Best Commercial Poems

the 
thick message 
competes with reality,
 pulls us like string puppets, 
wags the tail of truth,
prevents positive emotion,
obscures historic changes,
stopping time....
....slowing progress

increasing
 shareholder
value...

Continue reading...

I JUST CAN’T HELP IT, YA KNOW?

Elderly Lady: Help! I’ve fallen and I can’t get up!
First Alert: Duly noted, will there be anything else?
Elderly Lady: Are you going to call an ambulance?
First Alert: Ambulance?  Heck no! Call one yourself
Elderly Lady: But I’ve fallen and...

Continue reading...

DISGUSTING COMMERCIAL

As one gets older things begin to sag
Belly hangs over, energy lags

Better take thought for your health old man
Heed this add, start our diet plan

Oh, there’s fat-free, sugar-free, freedom from gas
Beach ball bloating a thing of the past

Darlene B,, bikini beauty, she lost fifty
From...

Continue reading...

Pringles with presentation in flavor
The chip itself is something to sliver
One bite and you know the taste is fresh
We look and you know you need to buy
All it takes is one try
The crispness being at its best
Other potato chip competitors in their contest
Lays with no...

Continue reading...

AN APPOINTMENT WITH DR. VIAGRA

Husband: Honey, I consulted a doctor before using this product and my ******** has lasted four or more hours so I guess I'm going to have to seek immediate medical attention
Wife: UH-UHH big boy, GET back over here
Husband: But honey, It...

Continue reading...

Act of inspiration wrestle pythons
Research scientists are the primary audience 
ethics and research breakthroughs

bring the beauty, multi-media presentation allows
photographers 
Auto loading service pistol-  long awaited culmination

Brutally overbuilt 
disregard" the request for help 
generally docile  the loudest creatures on earth

Shoot, shovel, and shut-up
collaborators use...

Continue reading...

Commercial  (The TV Miniseries)

I watch TV all day, even when I play or sleep
Information about cars, phones, pharmaceuticals
Is what I’m craving for, so give me more
Drug companies pay billions to make a score
To educate, inform, cure us of diseases we don’t have
They make sure...

Continue reading...

The city is famed
Stilettos on cobbled street
Glamorization...

Continue reading...

Santa was a fat cat
Who gave all his wealth away,
Taking toys to boys and girls
With his reindeer and red sleigh.
The pricey gifts for which kids asked
Put Santa in the hole.
He had to get himself a job
To stay off of the dole. 
So now you find...

Continue reading...

Ladies. Are you tired of having the family underfoot?
Are you fed up with their boorish behavior?

Great News. For a limited time only...
We present the must have product of the year.
       "Common Sense in a Can.'
Just apply it to the...

Continue reading...

Look-see into the Telly,
let that buy Idol Eye soil your soul
Go to sleep,
and fall deep
into the Cyclops’ belly
Allow the remote 
to take rip van winkle plug control
A lower case hypnotic beam
will put your credit card 
	         purchased...

Continue reading...

I have just the detergent,
To clean your dirty clothes,
I will even guarantee to you,
They will smell like a rose.

Even if you have no machine,
There is no need to fret,
In a pan soak them in this, 
Until they become very wet.

Leave your clothes one hour,
They will...

Continue reading...

The light is a game that changed our name
Made our lives this simple stain
Your life is pain I cannot sustain
Born to entertain, drown in the rain

All we do is fight
For what we think is right
Too bored to be suicidal
So denial takes a life

The screen is...

Continue reading...

We have been here all morning,
and we can be here all night.
Jack, I will have to give you a warning:
We will keep trying until you get it right.

Just say “Mama mia, atsa spicy meatball”.
Follow the procedure and say it.  That’s all!
Jack, are you getting...

Continue reading...

I am listening to a list of glorious disclaimers on TV
That follow a commercial about a terrific new wonder drug that
helps you blow freckles off your arms.

Usually I am in the kitchen getting
Something to eat by now, but this time I already had my little
banana...

Continue reading...