Best Bummer Poems

I knew I had to call a plumber  
   but he was busy 'til next summer. 
               Now I have no loo.
      ...

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Here we are sitting in the summer heat.
I paid forty-three bucks a piece for each seat.
For box seats, that’s some money in a heap.
If we sat in the bleachers, you would call me cheap.
A nice sultry Sunday afternoon we would choose.
However, we are watching our...

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On holiday whilst in South Zante
My uncle is caught ‘in flagrante’
Found in the jacuzzi
With fat floozie Susie
He’s no chance of coitus with aunty!
 
Aunt Bertha's quite livid with Mel
She kicked him out of their hotel
The lowlife, the fool
Now sleeps by the pool
Aunt certainly made his...

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My mood has been anything but jolly lately
Winter's coming, feels like I've had more than eighty
Into hibernation I go
Had way too much snow
Enough for ten lifetimes, guess I sound like a crybaby


© Jack Ellison 2015...

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So much is said of true love
And how it is sure to last
I don’t believe all that fluff
I have wisely moved on passed

Love lasts for a short, sweet time
Until he sees the baggage
The one he called a goddess
Has turned into a cabbage

He looks passed the...

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There was a young man from Nantucket,
Whose logic for life was to duck it. 
Scoffed “ignorance is bliss”
Till the fates took a piss,
Now life’s gone to hell in a bucket. 

February 6, 2023...

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The late Eddie Cochran summed it up well in his song.
The current situation I’m in is all wrong.
It is summertime, and that’s where we belong.
Folks hibernating all winter are doing their thing.
The weather is warm, and there are many birds that sing.
Although today is so...

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Support Your Local Po' Whet (Hick) Bummer, i.e. me

Freedom from onset of pervasive gloom 
(attendant with profusely perspiring palms, 
hut tree men duh us aggravation), would be 
a dog send to this melon collie bow wow 
wing *****sapien aging baby boomer. 

I already attend...

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Driving along in my new automobile
Eyes on the road, hands on the wheel
Ninety miles an hour, smile on my face
Today I'm in love with the whole human race
 
                ...

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I
Moon is a Necco
Wafer, Sugar Babies, we
‘Neath the Milky Way.

	II
Yorks, the Musketeers!
The Swedish Fish froth away
From the Whopper Balls.

	III
The dark side of Mars,
The Salt Kiss on the Heath,
No mint’s on the bed....

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A baboon at the zoo cleverly

made gestures to me like a friend,

then turned right around, displaying to me

his giant red ugly rear end!


Aug. 23, 2017 for the Animal Nonsense Poetry Contest...

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BUMMER

The last sad day of June my true love said goodby
She packed a bulging overnight
                              ...

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I am floating
Floating on a path towards destruction
Brimming on insanity
I walk the line
 
Water drops caress my cheeks 
On a dry summer's day
I feel them carve their way down through the skin 
Gravity plops them onto the grimy floor
 
The flowers are blooming now
And some days I...

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June has arrived-at last it is summer'
I'm up with the sun,(tho' in class I did slumber.)
But unlike others in that schoolhouse mob,
I can't be bothered to look for a summertime job.

Each day my buddy and I head to the beach,
Where a babe and a cold...

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The musical was near ready to start
When someone let off a rip roaring fart
The smell was horrific 
All had a sniff of it
‘Twas a bummer of an ass drummer’s fine art.

The show opened with a trumpet fanfare 
As the audience were gasping for air
The one...

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