Best Big Bucks Poems
I have a little something that I want you to see.
It’s a sample of great-grandpa’s secret recipe.
Blend of ingredients in the right combination;
hidden formula passed down to my generation.
Great-grandpa was a man having great longevity.
He lived to the ripe old age of one hundred and three.
This stuff was a contributor without any doubt.
When he was cremated, the fire wouldn’t go out!
Grandpa took over after great-grandpa passed away.
That’s why the legacy continues up to today.
The neighbors didn’t show the slightest inhibition.
Because grandpa made big bucks during Prohibition!
Another generation passed, and my pa would say:
“My son, it’s time to make some more of that stuff today.
But please boy, bring out the still without making a sound.
Somebody told me there’s some G-boys coming around!”
So my friend, I want to make a toast to you right here.
May you be filled with happiness without pain or fear.
So down the hatch with this stuff that I want you to try.
L’chaim, happy landing, here’s some mud in your eye!
Political life isn't cheap
moats are costly to clean when their deep
big bucks for a **** movie
and a duck house thats groovy,
it's enough to make Gordon Brown weep.
Cowboyin' seems so romantical as seen in th' pitcher shows.
Ain't a lick uv truth in that as ever' workin' cowpoke knows.
Movie stars is paid big bucks with a fancy saddle fer thar horse,
An' always ride off into th' sunset with a purty gal, uv course!
Real cowpokes don't wear designer jeans er fancy rhinestone suits.
You can tell a real buckaroo by th' looks uv his scruffy boots!
He's rousted out uv his bunk at th' break uv day;
(Seems it wuz jes' an hour er so ago, since he'd hit th' hay!)
He ain't got no time to strum a git'tar an' croon to a purty gal.
You'll usually find him ropin' an' a-sweatin' in a hot corral.
More'n likely them big stars lunch on caviar at th' country club,
While a cowpuncher eats beans an' bacon fer his daily grub!
In them western movies, handsome dudes ride tall in th' saddle.
A cowpoke has bowlegs frum years ridin' his cayuse astraddle.
Stunt men are handy to take th' falls fer fragile movie stars,
But a cowboy has to rough it an' can prove it by his scars!
When day is done th' movie cowboy goes home to his plush chalet.
A workin' cowboy goes to his humble bunkhouse at th' end uv day.
Cowpokes wonder why they cowboy - it shore ain't fer th' pay,
But they'll keep on a-ropin' and a-ridin' til they're old an' gray!
Robert L. Hinshaw, CMSgt, USAF, Retired (© All Rights Reserved)
KEEPING UP WITH THE DOW JONESES
These here are the indisputable facts
I was born on the right side of the tracks
WITH People who only smiled if their stocks or equity increased
If not they wouldn’t have minded becoming deceased
They had big cars, big bucks and big time class
With a million dollar house mortgaged up the a*s
Their children went to private schools in uniforms
With charming and well decorated dorms
I looked at their faces and wondered why I didn’t fit
That’s when the fire in my belly was originally lit
I had no desire to play with kids from private schools
Nor did I ever agree to obey by their rules
So one day I skipped over steel and these here are the facts
The people I found lived in tents, not even shanties or shacks
But they didn’t have to read Dow Jones in order to smile
And couldn’t care less about having Gucci type style
They smiled at things people ignore like little tykes at play
And somehow or other they AWOKE contented day after day
They had no stocks to watch fretfully fall or RESOUNDINGLY rise
And you could see the easiness in their gleaming eyes
That which I observed in them appealed to me a great deal
The wrong side people taught me how satisfied I could feel
They lived out of back-packs, antique cedar chests and sacks
So if you come a’looking for me I’ll be on the wrong side of the tracks
© 2011.…Phreepoetree ~free cee!~
Where are your voices, Me-too, Planned Parenthood, NOW
your Jewish sisters violated, raped by the dozens - How
come you've gone quiet,
your silence deafens ...
Those Jewish sisters supported you during hard times
contributed big bucks, marched with you to protest crimes ...
Now, your covert antisemitism ~
your future credibility threatens
Go ahead, ask me
Am I'm proud of my dear son Scott
You can bet your sweet darn bippy I am
Proud as one of them peacocks
Turned out to be a guru
In the fast paced world of computers
There ain't no problem my Scottie can't solve
Nuttin' can stump my Scooter
Destined to make big bucks
In the fast paced world of promotions
Not too long fore he's living on easy street
People will say what's this commotion
The commotion will be my Scottie
Setting the pharmaceutical world on fire
With ingenious solutions to all their problems
Reaching goals to which I aspired
Was once a guru like Scooter
Was a whole lot different in those days
No computers, just a big bunch of magic markers
Creating ads the old fashioned way
Go ahead, ask me
Am I'm proud of my dear Scooter boy
You better believe it, I'm over the top thrilled
He's my absolute pride and joy!
Do you think I'm a proud Papa?
Everyone wants free help from that Computer expert, Hubby of mine.
They want to know his computer secrets, on what he does, each time.
So let me give you some hints, for he’s brilliant, in what he can do!
Then, if you believe me… Well, that will be…strictly up to you.
Whenever the line SLOWS down, it’s a FBSOW! What’s does that mean?
That there’s a Fat Bird Sitting On the Wire, hanging on so tight…
That he’s choking your signal off… So, you see! It’s time to call a tech!
He’ll be able to send a signal out to… Yep, to Kick that big ole’ Bird off!
When you try to turn your computer on, and it doesn’t want to come on?
Hubby will send a signal to kick it, in its’ illustrious little ole’, tin pants!
You see, there’s no better way to wake up… the Slug-A-Bug there…
That’s stopping it from coming on, cause he wants to snooze, some more!
You’ve a computer that squeaks and grinds, and isn’t acting very nice?
Then he’ll send it a little more juice that’ll oil, its spinning hinges up.
You’d be amazed what a little juice can do…to help those Hamsters’ out!
He’ll make it hum, as those Hamsters run, and enjoy themselves, all night!
Hey… Got Bug-A-Boos’ in the system? Having trouble with The Internet?
He’ll send another type of signal to send those amazing spider-bots out.
They can catch those spy-bots quick, within those webs they love to spin.
You know! Spy-bots that mine your info, and love to give it out, again!
But too many cobwebs can begin, to clog everything, slowing it, way down.
Then Hubby can sic that Fat Bird Sitting On the Wire to clean them out!
What! What did you think made him so fat? Surely, you must of, seen that?
But Hubby knows, and that’s WHY, as a computer tech, he gets big bucks!
All this time, you’ve been none the wiser! Now, what do you think of that!
Written by Mike and Carol Eastman
I slipped on a fry and hurt my back
Sue Burger King! said my lawyer Jack
I asked for big bucks
But Jack kinda sucks
Now I carry my stuff in a sack
Bring back blonde babes
with big boobs and butts,
showing bare bellies, wearing black and brown boots.
Because they get the bikers and big boys
to bring in big bucks buying bottles of
Budweiser and, blue ribbon beer,
Besides the booze and beef burgers
on buns with bacon and baked beans
for brunch while they watch and
bet on baseball games or boxing matches.as
they banter with their buddies at the bar
or in the booths and bathroom.
The jukebox plays Blondie, Blues brothers
big Bands, Bono, Bananarama, Brandi, Billy Ray Cyrus.
Benny King., Backstreet boys., Beach Boys, Billy Idol
Bobby Brown, and so much more
at Big Busty Babes Bar
Bring your best buddies with you to
Big Busty babe's bar. Down on Broadway and Bakers Boulevards
Near Buster's Barbecue and Bobby's Billiards and Bank of America.
Bonnie J Hollywood-Cutts
Ode to a Writer
Who will find it?
my consonants of Gold,
and vowels of Silver,
my pearls of poetry,
and rubies of writing,
Who will find me?
So, I can be paid
the Big, Big bucks?,
So I can hob knob
with Who's Who,
and lecture them
on such and such.
Publishers out there,
I got plots to pitch,
ideas to discuss,
Ways to make you rich
But All in All,
I'm tired of waiting
And God,
I've been praying
for that right way of saying,
Sir, would you, Uh
Ma'am, could you, Um.
What if I Uh
Maybe I could Um.
Who will find it?
my consonants of Gold,
and vowels of Silver,
my pearls of poetry,
and rubies of writing.
NoelsArt
Comments: Like many of us, I hope to be discovered, go “viral”. I like the “Sir, would, Uh”, shows my shyness, awkwardness, wanting and fearing fame I guess. FEEDBACK WELCOME.
There was something odd about this stranger
She called herself a holistic healer
But truly there was nothing “holy” about her
“Bring me an eye of a young newt,” she said
“Two toads that haven’t recently been fed
Be sure to include a Vampire Bat’s head”
“But I just have a problem sleeping in bed;
Shouldn’t I drink chamomile tea instead?”
The scowl she offered filled me with great dread
“You asked for my help; do you really want it?
You risk seeing your name in an obit.”
She scared me to action, I must admit
It took some work, but when I returned
Over to her all her requests I turned
Thinking a cure I must surely have earned
“Ah,” she said wickedly, “thank you, my dear.”
She handed me chamomile tea in good cheer
So I asked why she’d made requests so *****
“Stick around, you’ve more problems than you know
I have to treat that scaly patch that grows
From the top of your head down to your toes”
Ran out, I did, pledged never to come back
Saw in a mirror skin flaking and black
Vowed to find a doctor who’s not a quack!
The newt, toads and bat caused this reaction
Now I needed a full skin extraction
Paid a real doc big bucks for satisfaction
*Written in honor of Deborah Guzzi's The Road to Wellville contest
Satan, I don’t like your hating.
Satan, I don’t want any part of you.
No fractions, none of your distractions,
I want to live the life that’s true.
This life guarantees the ultimate satisfaction.
Satan, I don’t want to have any dealings with you
You hinder my life that is true. No one wants to
Be sad and blue and tear everything up like you do
Satan, you messed up. You have too many whammies.
You’re pressed out of luck. I want big bucks but,
Not in the manner that you get them. That way want
Last and will not benefit anyone else in God’s kingdom
To ever get GLAD. Satan, I don’t want any part of
Your MAD. I want the best for my God-given, created,
Can’t be faded life. Something that you gave up a long
Time ago and you suffered a great big fall like Humpty
Dumpty on the wall, all of the kingdom’s horses and
All of the kingdom’s men should not have the desire
To put you together for your selfish desires to win so
Many will catch on fire as a result of you. Satan, you
Lie on me and my God-given, created, family. Satan,
You see the worst in me and want me to believe it’s true.
Satan, in Hell you’ll be skating on your wannabe icy
Lake of fire because you had the desire to be the Creator
And be a hater to what God made greatly. So skate ornately
And leave me alone. I want to live with God and not
In your heated home. Satan, I don’t want any part of you.
No fractions, no distractions, I want to live the life that’s true.
1-26-11
Go ahead, ask me
Am I'm proud of my dear son Scott
You can bet your sweet little bippy I am
Proud as one of them peacocks
Turned out to be a guru
In the fast paced world of computers
There ain't no problem my Scottie can't solve
Nuttin' can stump my Scooter
Destined to make big bucks
In the fast paced world of promotions
Not too long fore he's living on easy street
People will say what's this commotion
The commotion will be my Scottie
Setting the pharmaceutical world on fire
With ingenious solutions to all their problems
Reaching goals to which I aspired
Was once a guru like Scooter
Was a whole lot different in those days
No computers, just a big bunch of magic markers
Creating ads the old fashioned way
Go ahead, ask me
Am I'm proud of my dear Scooter boy
You better believe it, I'm over the top thrilled
He's my absolute pride and joy!
© Jack Ellison 2013
Do you think I'm a proud Papa?
Why do people pay big bucks
For something by Chanel?
I realize that they’re selling to
A wealthy clientele…
But I really just don’t get it.
Every pocketbook or such
With that famous logo goes for
What most folks would say too much.
And by that, I’m talking thousands
Just to own, what seems to me,
Quite an ugly choice of purses
With a fancy pedigree.
Still, so many women want them
And I really wish I knew
What’s the root of their attraction,
For I haven’t got a clue.
Real love is what I desire.
I'm burning hotter that fifty fires.
It's been a long time. Big bucks
No longer turn me on. Real love
Is what I want. Big bucks have
No luck with me. Real love is
Destined to be. I will sail to
The farthest sea. Real love is
What I need. Somewhere not
Too far from me, real love has
Planted a seed. I want it to grow
More and more closer to me.
The fire is blazing hotter than
Fifty fires. Real love is with you
And it is the only love that I
The only love that I desire.
4-7-11