Best Bazooka Poems


Premium Member For All The Sweet Lovers

Flying Saucers, Flake, Bar Six
Country Style, Gobstoppers, Twix

Arrow Bars and Sherbert Dabs
Sweet Tobacco, Lucky Bags

Toffee Crisp and Dairy Crunch
Grand Seville and Milky Lunch

Beta Bars, Loot, Candy Floss
The mysterious chewing gum flavour loss

Golden Crisp, Nut Crisp and Fuse
Extra, Bliss and Trebor Chews

Caramel and Raspberry Ruffles
Drifter and Milk Chocolate Truffles

‘99’ Flake ice cream cones
Zooms and Fabs and Toblerones

Coffee Break, Bitz, Victory Vs
Cadbury’s Special Recipes

Swisskit, Gold Mine, Apple Jack
Tiffin, Feast and Caramac

Welcome, Skippy and Sultana
Nutty, Banjo and Cabana

Chewing Nuts, Cough Candy Twist
Butterscotch and Butterkist

Crunchie, Topic, Fudge, Mintola
Super Mousse, Crazy Joe Cola

Golden Cup, Fruit Flavoured Rocks
(The secret of) The Black Magic Box

Floral Gums and Cherry Lips
Olde English Spangles, Walnut Whips

Kinder toys encased in plastic
Necklace sweets linked on elastic

Butter Mints, Fruit Polos, Yorkies
Sherbert Lemons, Sherbert Strawberries

Bazooka Joes and Liquorice pipes
Lollipops with swirly stripes

Mint Cracknel, Taxis, long red laces
Texan Bars and Funny Faces

Winter Mixture, Rainbow Drops
Jazzies, Kit Kat, Pips, Ice Pops

Toffee Bon Bons, Drumsticks, Rolos
Amazin’ Raisin, Aztec, Mojos

Barley Sugar, Chocolate Limes
Daims that changed their name from Dimes

Jelly Babies, Jelly Tots
Milk Gums, Munchies, Mars, Pear Drops

Coltsford Rock and Anglo Bubblies
Sugared Almonds, Frozen Jubliies

Peanut Brittle, Prize, Ice Breaker
Dolly Mixtures, Old Jamaica

Kop Kops, Wine Gums, Laughs and Treets
Jap Desserts and whistling sweets

Fishermen's Friends and Hacks and Zubes
Pineapple Chunks and Cola Cubes

Everton Mints and Pontefract Cakes
White chocolate mice and jelly snakes

Refreshers, Teacakes, Swizzles, Pacers
Toffee Logs, Fruit Gums and Waifers

Rumba, Dipped Flake, T Bar, Tunes
Fry's Five Centres, Macaroons

Bars and boxes of Milk Tray
Milky Bar and Milky Way


This ‘Pick and Mix’ is yours to share

With all sweet lovers 

everywhere.

Premium Member Daddies Girl

the smell of Carmel corn 
fills the air – I think of you Dad
your hand in mine, four steps to your one
the carousel music scores happiness
bells of laughter ting-a-ling-ing

Cotton candy, pink as bazooka bubble gum,
melts to sugary paste on teeth and tongue
you are there Dad, hanky in hand
spit bathing my four year old cheeks
moon-faced, eyes crinkled

lifted skyward as the horses stop
I pick the girlie one but sit straddled
you pinch my knees and pull down my skirt
muscle man strong --  your hands strap me in
they rest after on the small of my back as I rise
then I come [the brass pole all gummy
from my hands]

last week we walked the country fair
my hand now as big as yours
aged like two apple dolls, we meander
you buy me cotton candy
spit on your thumb and wipe
it from my cheek

A Thump on the Head - No Regrets

In times of impending demise, you might see your life being replayed across your mind. Sometimes it’s in fast forward, sometimes in slow motion, sometimes both at once. Life flashes in random order, constantly cycling in and out like an out of control tilt-a-whirl at the county fair. You’d think that with all those moments stuck on a playback loop that one would walk away with perfect recall of all the events. Not true. You can remember things like the first time you pooped in your diaper and that piece of Bazooka Joe bubble gum you pocketed when you were ten years old. Every detail, no matter how small or insignificant will come flooding back. But what the heck just went down, draws a complete blank.

when death feels certain, 
life flashes by in seconds—
don’t regret the show


Take Two Bullets

Take Two Bullets

Take two bullets orally with gun powder dry
Loaded water as a chaser can shoot them down
Some cinnamon for flavor to encase the rounds
Ensures the procedure is correct, is profound
Torpedoes are too difficult to swallow
Something about their shape and size
Avoid bazooka breath when you digest
The aftertaste is hollow and benign 
Keep projectiles away from children
Who creep up from behind
Stir things up with barrels of a pistol
Two bullets is what the doctor ordered
But not as suppositories
If all goes well with the original directions
Fragments should come out intact about the other side
We can project that these projectiles
Will have a happy healthy outcome in the end
Keep extra ammunition by your side in bed
Always check the expiration dates
Take your bullets every day to stay alive

Bubble Gum Is Yummy Yum

Bubblegum is sweet and chewy
Blowing bubbles can get gooey
When it pops inside your hair
Trying to pull it out with care
Doesn't work neither does washing
SO scissors are used for forcing
Out this yummy ooey treat
That every kid loves to eat
Trident and Dentyne caress
Your mouth with a nice freshness
So people aren't scared away
It also helps with tooth decay
Bazooka Joe was really fun 
Comics wrapped around the gum
With funny jokes and prize points too
Gifts could be mailed to you
Zebra gum was full of rainbows
Colored bubbles you could blow
Different flavors in each stick
Finding your favorite was the trick
Chicklets are so cute and square
You could take them anywhere
In a box they are protected
The smallest gum that was invented
The best gum came in a pack
Of trading cards you could stack
And trade with all of your friends
Complete collections int eh end
People chew gum everyday
A trend that is here to stay
Being chewed so merrily
A treat that is happi8ly 
Part of everybody's world
But please don't be like the girl
Who was acting so stingy
And turned into a blueberry

Bazooka Joe Is Gum - 1000 Ways To Die

David slings a rock
Cop holsters a glock, Lizzie Borden packs an axe
Mac he packs the knife, Billy battles with a club, Tommy’s gun is a sub
Kelly’s got one too, Bazooka Joe Is Gum, Peter Gunn isn't,Colt45not malt
Nor is it a horse, horseshoes & handgrenades, canons have big balls, Doc 
Holiday had TB Rock Hudson had HIV, James Dean crashes his car,Hank Williams crashes a bar, Natalie Wood don’t float, Cain killed his brother,  Juliette  drank poison for her lover, Rev. Jim Jones killed with cool-aid,         Whitey Bulger he got paid,dead man walking gets to eat Rodney King 
got beat, Cupid’s arrow as Clyde Barrow, Mama Cass choked on ham 
57,000 gone in Nam, Four dead in Ohio, Kamikazes fall 1941, again 
they fall 2001Iraqi leader with a rope, John Belushi too much dope, 
Charles Manson is alive MichaelJackson isn’t,Saturday night special 
is very ordinary, Fast and furious is the crime, Dick Clark just his 
time Pirate victims walk the plank, THINK,
Next I’ll come rolling in a tank
Hear the whistle of my missile
Dirty Harry had the biggest
The  Derringer  is  small
Smokey Bear forest fire
Greek funeral is a pyre
Too many +’s or -’s
Is electric surges
 Woman and child      
sing the dirges
Walking dead
Are zombies
Fat man and
Little Boy
Are atom
Bombies


Donald Duck and the Ak47

I first seen this bird 
When I was seven
His name is Donald Duck
And he's got an A.K.47
Why you ask does this bird got heat
Well he's from American where there's a need
Mickey mouse carrie's a 30 ot 6
Minnie's liberal she carrie's a stick
Goofie's got a sub machine gun
That silly dog is lot's of fun
Then we have Snow White and the 7 dwarfs
Who enjoy target practice at the golf course
They like themselve's a 45
There also wanted dead or alive
Peter Pan and Tinker Bell
Both of them can rot in he**
As for Mr. Walt himself
He's a bazooka man that launches elve's
So the next time you goto disneyland
Better bring some ammo and some sand

Warner C Baxter -Acrostic

Words of Warner is the title of my second book, coming soon
Author, songwriter, musician, producer, philosopher, poet
Recognized as a poet of merit International Society of Poets
Nominated as poet of the year 2007 by The Society of Poets
Editors choice award, Howard Ely managing editor poetry.com 
Romance rhyme rant ribaldry rhythmic lyrics patriotic and more

Collection of titles

Bazooka Joe is Gum, Belated, Be Kind, Big Brown Eyes
American Time, Arizona spring, ABC's of Pie, Amazing
X rated: Hedgehog, Miss Honey Lynn, **** star Prayer
Tumultuous Traveler, Tom’s a Peeper, Time, Tomorrow
Easter Acrostic, Every day is Father's day, Easter Cross
Rock ‘n Roll Dream, Renegade Man, Rising from the East


and so much more

Bazooka Joe Is Gum

WESSON
GIVES A LESSON
WITH   A   .357
DAVID SLINGS A ROCK
COP HOLSTERS A GLOCK
LIZZY BORDEN PACKS AN AXE
MAC HE PACKS THE KNIFE
BILLY BATTLES WITH A CLUB
TOMMY’S GUN IS A SUB
KELLY’S GOT ONE TOO
BAZOOKA JOE IS GUM
PETER GUNN IS NOT
COLT .45 IS NOT MALT
NOR IS IT A HORSE
HORSESHOES AND
HAND GRENADES
CANONS HAVE BIG BALLS
DOC HOLIDAY HAD TB
ROCK HUDSON HAD HIV
NATILIE WOOD DON’T FLOAT
NATILIE HOLLAWAY DON'T FLOAT
THE TITANIC BOAT DON'T FLOAT 
JAMES DEAN CRASHED HIS CAR
HANK WILLIAMS CRASHED HIS BAR
DIRTY HARRY HAD THE BIGGEST
THE DERRINGER IS SMALLEST
CAIN MURDERED HIS BROTHER
JULIETTE DRANK POISON FOR HER LOVER
JIM JONES KILLED WITH COOL-AID
SLASHING WRISTS WITH A BLADE
BOW AND ARROW KILLS THE SAME 
AS BONNIE OR CLYDE BARROW
CHARLES MANSON IS ALIVE
MICHAEL JACKSON IS NOT
IRAQI RULER WITH A ROPE
JOHN BELUSHI  TOO MUCH DOPE
SATURDAY NIGHT SPECIAL IS ORDINARY
FAST AND FURIOUS IS THE CRIME
PIRATE VICTIMS WALK THE PLANK
THINK! NEXT TIME I”LL BRING A TANK
HEAR THE WHISTLE OF MY MISSILE?
AFTER THAT WHAT DO YOU BET?
I’LL COME FLYING IN A FIGHTER JET
SMOKEY BEAR’S RIGHT TO “BEAR” ARMS
OR  DID  WE  JUST  ARM  BEARS?
NEVER STIFLE MY RIFLE
THIS IS MY RIFLE THIS IS MY GUN
ONE FOR FIGHTING ONE FOR FUN
CADENCE…
BANG - BANG - BANG - BANG - BANG - BANG
RELOAD
MOLON LABE
COME AND TAKE THEM
THE ONLY WAY FREEDOM OF SPEECH WORKS
IS BECAUSE THE 1st AMENDMENT 
IS BACKED BY THE 2nd AMENDMENT

Premium Member Lollapalooza

Here's a cool word, it's a “lollapalooza”
From ancient times just like “zippity-doo-da”
You young'uns have yours
But old folks more mature
Have our own cool lingo like a gum called Bazooka


© Jack Ellison 2015

Premium Member The Rat - In Trumps Own Words

Cohen’s a snitch, an eel,
A despicable squeal,
Why I once trusted this horrible man,
This sniveling lawyer whose life is a sham,
Is simply beyond me a momentary lapse,
Yet one more sharp pain that my energy saps.
And while this all irks, stealing my time,
I revel in knowing the payback’s sublime.
His next stop a cell, depressing and cramped,
The perfect abode for this creep to be dumped.
As for these democrats digging for dirt
Little they realize their pistols just squirt,
I’ve the bazooka loaded and primed
Waiting to fire at the moment best timed,
So let them all revel while they still can
For I am the gale force to their puny fan.

Premium Member Lollapalooza

Here's a cool word, it's a “lollapalooza”
From ancient times just like “zippity-doo-da”
You young'uns have yours
But old folks more mature
Have our own cool lingo like a gum called Bazooka

Cowabunga

7/13/17



Cowabunga
I'm coming in with a hunga munga
Near and far from any rotunda
Going in and out the umbra
While close and beyond yucca
Across desert, grassland, forest and tundra

Yargh!
Now I'm wielding a katar
And scimitar
On par
Ready to spar
Time I raise the bar

Hallelujah
Next I'll use the zhua
Above and below plants and fruit trees such as satsuma
Regarding any terrain with or without puma and vicuna
As well as waters that do or don't have tuna, beluga and barracuda
If that doesn't work, then surely will the bazooka

Man From Nkandla

I know a man from Nkandla called Zuma
He has an offspring like tuna
He thinks shower
Has the power
To repair his broken bazooka

All

9/9/17


A continual downfall
Daily was at a crawl
From so much alcohol
This problem I'm going to solve
When you keep bringing in the haul
It's sad how many of ya'll
Want to brawl
Just another brick in the wall
I'm out to ball
Unread messages and missed calls
No time to stall
When it's money, I want it all
Got to stack it tall
Not getting involved in anything small

Not pseudo
Numero uno
Out for mucho
Heart colder than pluto

It's like hallelujah
When I get that moola
Here to always outdo ya
Even If I got to use a bazooka
Or put you in waters with shark and barracuda
From here to beyond the Bermuda

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