Searching for the chemistry that we had
Was it ur age?
She is ur age and yet not the same
Was it ur blonde hair?
She has blonde hair and still not like u
Looking for the qualities that only u possess
Smoking myself into a coma every night
Clearly out of my mind
Thoughts of u send my mind into a tailspin
Lost with no communication
Searching an uncharted piece of my soul
I have never had these damned feelings
The words u told me were lies of a hopeful heart
We will never pick up where we left off
This emptiness will never be filled
I thought that I had loved and lost before
I had no idea it was like this...
My happy place is listening to Harry Styles with u on the porch in the sunshine of May. Ur blonde hair glowing in the sunshine. White tank top, short jean shorts. Ur yellow toe nail polish.
Soon after, reality starts to take over
The clouds roll in and slowly take away my sunshine, as u disappear into the fading sunshine. I am left alone in the gloom of an overly cloudy, grey sky. I wait through the rain and snow, hoping to catch a glimpse of ur face in the sunshine.
THERE’S SOMETHING ABOUT U-
Something about you;
Have realigned my view;
The thought of you;
Come clear so true;
Darling just I say, I love U;
Whatever you do;
I’d always be true;
At 1st, 2nd and ever glance;
Come alas my darling (I) choose;
To just be humbly devoted to you;
Sometimes you;
Come unto;
A being so true;
So ever true;
You’re sunshiny face;
Your heaven warmth your grace;
Anoints you steps every pace by pace;
Darling just I say, I love U
Y
Comes so clear ever so true;
I’d never, ever be blue;
With those thoughts of U;
You’ve realigned my view;
Ahh! There’s something about U;
3/25/21
Written words by James Edward Lee Sr. ©2021
Wanted dead or alive
When I want u so bad I could have died inside
Died Inside my mind with out even noticing
Screaming at myself without hearing a note of it
Thoughts of u are running through my veins
Like a poison ivy strangling my brain
Every thought is consumed by u
Like my every breath is controlled by u
Wanted dead or alive the poster reads
It’s like it’s advertising my deepest needs
A few simple words summing up my submission
Forcing myself to this dark admission
A deep dark world and your the only vision
The light in my eyes, my reason for living
Here goes another day,
I think of you while ur away at work,
I know u think all I do is play.
Throughout my day.
But really it ain't the same
I do my best to hold up my part,
U blame me for,
Things of all sorts...
What you dont see is
That I care for u in every way...
An thoughts of u is,
What gets me through my day
Till u come home with a smiling face
That over fills heart
With joy...
the wind is blowing,
my blood is flowing,
the thoughts of u are in my head,
trying to get out of this bed,
u made me crazy, thinking of how i made u sick,
the wrong i've done, in two im gonna split,
i need to show u, that ive changed,
there is a price i have to pay,
your heart is filled with hate and disgrace,
i lied to u, but im going to make ur pain fly away,
show u a way, that i am the same,
the little girl that was ur angel,
the little girl that was ur best freind, ur daughter..
Spring is here! and I'm sprung baby i really need you
I'm happy to be in your heart still, you know we be close friends
like we was posted as a cute pair, you eyes lead me up into you like blue stairs
Stuck well feel the power of skills as i mauneuver,
Baby slammed me with bamboo cupids arrow be thick planted deep inside my chest
She speaks and i hear the cutest things
Thoughts of u consumed me i couldn't think, I could'nt become complacent
Be honest my days great! my life is spring only if its u with flowers and blooming
i lie here
but never can i sleep
thoughts of u haunt me in my dreams
i find ways to make it easier to forget u
but u still remain in my soul
this is not fair
why am i the one left to bleed
why must i cut myself open to release u
ashes to ashes and dust to dust
but im the only one who got burned
i dont understand why i cant heal from this
hearts mend so slow
never again will i fall for this
guard myself from the world
surround myself with safe faces
but they seem to drift away
not knowing why or were things went wrong
still tears me apart
if u wanted me to think it was my fault
u did your job
i try to stay away from u
but i find myself staring right at u
endless lies ive tried to fool myself
hell maybe they're true
all i kno is u dont think of me
so why i cant forget you
Your an undeniable energy
beaming, nurturing my mental,
Shining his alluring nature on me. A
billion times brighter than the sun,
his wisdom a blessing, yes ... better
then silver or gold. He levitates me
without hand's, just promise you'll
never let go! Treasure at the end of
a rainbow u are, half of I ... Gemini.
Our minds collaboration is more
wet then rain falling from the sky.
More euphoric then any high, our
bond whatever we desire to create
whether dancing on blazing sun or
resting on crescent moon... together
incredibly molded from God in the
blesseth month of June! I bathe in
ur light... resurrection in the form of
heaven to ur kiss, longing for just
1... grateful for our unification.
Supreme god body u... your a gift
and thoughts of u endless!! WILL -I-
AM__ (S)hining!!! FALLING……… And
just like our sign I can never be in
just one place or be just one thing,
multi dreaming of belonging to a
multitude of u, mind, body & soul. I
Take II have & to hold forevermore!
King ... keep shining ur light on me!
And in return I'll promise to be all
the things u need to keep a man like
u complete ... will u let me?
Flashback memoirs of when i longed for ur attention
Untangible thoughts of u placed me in subdued submission
Undeniable adversion came along with this decision
To leave you behind instead of continuious remissions
Of retracing footsteps back to you
Everytime you did something you knew made me yearn for you
The presence you gave me came across like a photograph
Capturing glimpes of ur love yes they last
But Only in the form of a painful memory
Remembered we used to be encased in the same senerary
Once we drew the same line, walked the same path
Until you became the better half of me
Now it seems loneliness has become my company
Never did I imagine I would hear a lovers cry
Never did I think it would be coming from my eyes
But as time goes on i began to realize
Now with you gone I have a new sunrise
And it sets with knowing with the in and outs and conjures of my soul
That my trues love resides inside of me and never grows old
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