Short Crap Poems
Short Crap Poems. Below are examples of the most popular short poems about Crap by PoetrySoup poets. Search short poems about Crap by length and keyword.
When a know-it-all paints the wall
With your silhouette in excrement...
Do not engage the louse,
For a fly does not enter a closed mouth.
8/15/2019
There was a man named Hickenlooper.
Who invented a dog poop scooper.
Something went awry
Flinging contents into the sky
And stinking the town into a stupor.
I know a woman
Whose name is Jeff
Her last names forman
And she is deaf
It's not her real name
Only for pretend
Not close to the same
She left in the end
He rolls the dice just for fun
But then he goes on a run
Forgot that he had played for fun
But though that he had just won
Until he was shown the butt of a gun
mud on your face flung dung comes around
18.01.04
Composed for Silent One's
Monoku 5: Cliche - Poetry Contest
"what goes around comes around"
Super Bowel Half Time Rap Crap
Whole super bowel half time rap,
Was really a total bunch of crap;
Will not care;
A sad affair;
Resulting in humongous mishap.
Jim Horn
Na- Nu Na-Nu
greetings earthlings How do you do
I'm captain Zendor from planet Sur Render
shazbot someone crashed into my spaceship's fender
hit me so hard made me go krap-poo
Pritzker gleaned his mansion of crappers
for the purpose of not paying taxes
but when his belly gurgled
alleyways filled with his turds
a homeless gal just sat back and laughed
Grounding pounding wanna grab
Jousty jack wanna stab
Anger clutching his mind
Crack spouting nonsense
Idiotic ineffable reason
The conflict season..
Note.Nonsense makes no sense..
Are we ready for the crap soon at hand
Earth's in danger of succumbing to man's plan
Our natural resources
Will all be lost to us
Can we stop this disaster or just sit on our fan
Day are getting shorter, my tooth is getting longer
It's an ongoing process, we're all trying to conquer
So far it ain't working
The gods are smirking
Crap happens anyway in spite of the author
Some days are diamonds, some days are pure crap
Jury's out, today could go either way, could overlap
Those days cause friction
Tween reality and fiction
I'm confused enough without adding to my handicap
A professor has published his thesis
On removal of impacted faeces
Use the end of a pencil
Or a kitchen utensil
to dislodge clumps of faeces in pieces!
Told you it was a crap poem!
05/14/20
King Pin and Needle Queen
Sitting in their court
The jester tosses coloured eggs
To amuse them with his sport
The king will catch a red one
The queen, she grabs a blue
But when they crack them open
They’re filled with chicken poo.
Release the hounds
Call out the guard
Some simple fool
Crapped in my yard
Oh woe is me
Oh heavy sigh
Look at this poo
Piled a mile high
No words will help
No song be sung
Just tell me now
Who flung the dung
CRAP SHOOT
Take your chance, random.
No worry: sure, to click once.
‘But,’ If’ or ‘Perhaps’
events roll, life progresses.
Probability makes way.
05/04/19
'THE CRAP SHOOT ' Contest by John Lawless.
No matter how we try to create or imagine
Some sort of utopia within this pathetic world ?
Welcome to another day I heard the bleeping fool say
As they sailed away atop their tactical tortoise tombstone ships....
Ichneumonflies his mete's lap dog larvae enterprise; epileptic metempsychosis.
Form:
The toxins in dried sewage paste
Have left our farm land poison laced
This waste on crops spread
Won’t hurt if you’re dead
And doesn’t affect the food taste
Fertilizer’s best bargain brand
Is dried solid sludge on farm land
Now the food we eat
Contains something sweet
And our scientists want it banned
My aunt Shay was creative, inventive and fun.
She made dolls for us out of scraps of our clothes.
It was terrific to see what she concocted and constructed.
She could make things out of ribbons, yarn, bits of nothing.
She was clever and playful, and the dolls reflected it.
She had the personality and the childlike qualities of a pixie.
Long wanders across hills
Expiring - Three of my steps were one of my Dad's
Halting will
Refuelling near
Banks brandished fennell freely had
Revered
Herb young
Stung by green glad
Tongue
Washed down with water swills
Sweaty bunch became invalid
Flung
29th July 2020
Minichu an Innocent Childhood Memory
Mohan Chutani
How faithfully my calories I count.
Believe me, I have counted them
since age fifteen. Oh, the amount
of food for decades I had!
But after each new decade - CRAP!
Metabolism slows down. Things get bad.
I recalculate calories or exercise more.
Otherwise, I fatten. THAT I deplore!
Oct. 6, 2020
For John Lawless' The Crap Shoot #2 Poetry Contest
I compose my poems like Wallace Stevens
by walking the streets of my town.
But unlike the esteemed Wallace Stevens,
I don't have to memorize or write my poems down.
I just turn on my cellphone's recorder,
then slowly whisper my word into it.
But instead of composing gems, like Wallace Stevens,
I tend to produce just a drivel of shhhhh~it.
Cat faeces in piles on the grass
I’m tempted to butt plug cat’s ass
But two solar cat scarers
Have stopped cat crap terrors
Their solar charged tone works first class!
No kitty poop piles this week
Though daily its cat poop I seek
There’s no turds on my lawn
I’m no longer forlorn
Cat’s crapping elsewhere, YES! I shriek!
You were a hot shooter for a while.
Your point making earned me a pile.
However, you just sevened-out.
To me, there is no doubt.
With a new partner, I am coming out.
I have no more love for you.
Your love for me was untrue.
You did things that were not nice.
Now it’s time to pass the dice.
All your bets are gone from the table.
Another shooter is ready, willing, and able.
Grandpa Franken Monster did a cha cha cha
after he ate his breakfast- tomatoes and bacon raw
Why does he eat that crap? Asked his wife maw
They were at a restaurant during the Mardi Gras
The waitress said he is not the only one
I used to have a husband who ate bullets from his gun
Pica? I asked, thinking I knew something, just for fun.
No, he was insane, said this waitress, as is our son.