Funny Satire Poems

I bought me a horse from a feller named Clyde,
said, "She’s gentle and sweet, just a joy for to ride."
Well, "Maybe" she was, and maybe...

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Holy Slime of Spring™
Seasonal Epic -- Limited Drop

A divine ooze imbued with chaotic Easter energy.
Hand-delivered by a suspiciously muscular bunny and sealed in a glitter...

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TimeSteep™ Tea Leaves
Brew your past. Sip your future. Choke on your destiny.

Tired of basic herbal blends that just soothe your throat?
Want a cup that knows...

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MysticMisfits™ Return Policy
(Cursed Edition)
--for when you regret your haunted impulse buys but the universe has other plans.
Please read carefully. Some conditions may apply to your...

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MysticMisfits™ Staff Directory

Staff Spotlight:The WanderPoet
Position: Ephemeral Verse Consultant
Clock-in Time: Unknown
Clock-out Time: Immediately After You Notice Him

You won’t see him arrive.
You might catch a glimpse--
a flicker...

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Presenting...

LipHex™ Balm
The kiss that lingers… like a spell.

Are your kisses lacking oomph?
Need to make a statement that’s equal parts soft and sinister?

Introducing LipHex™ Balm--
infused with...

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How to Find the Shop
A whispered map for the bold, the broken, and the slightly curious.

--A cryptic guide for those who seek the odd, the...

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The MysticMisfits™ Catalog
 “Where the arcane meets the absurd.” 

Featured Products:

MysticMist™ Eye Drops – See the truth. Regret immediately.

BoneTone™ Music Box – Wind your way...

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Introducing... BoneTone™ Music Box!
Tired of basic playlists?
Want music with soul -- and possibly a few spirits?

Crank open your ancestral vault
with the BoneTone™ Music Box--
the only...

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Introducing... MysticMist™ Eye Drops! 
See the unseen. Blink into the beyond.

Are your regular eye drops leaving you… underwhelmed?
Do you yearn to gaze into the fabric...

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I’m an Asian
So, I’m civilized!

-Really?

I’m a European; an American white
I’m an Oceania and I’m civilized!

-Really!?

I’m an African
Victim of apartheid
An oppressed black
But, I’m civilized!

-Really!?

I’m a highly...

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When I reminded her that the Bible does tell
to love not only yourself, but your neighbor as well,
she said, "But Mister Tabor,
you're not my neighbor,
so,...

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Cold death it is, descending from the sky,
That like a shroud, across the land doth lie.

And why need death be cold?
Let we this tale unfold.
Dire...

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A sentence or two, nothing more.
Five rhymes, and then back out the door.
A meter that’s strained,
Some topic profaned:
Ah me! What’s a limerick for?
...

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Why do politicians lie
And our wallets deftly pry,
Puff and bluster all the time
Their intent to cheat sublime.

Are we dumb or just naive
Of that talent to...

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