Funny Nice Poems

Here’s Some Nice Poem By A, “Punny” Guy

Puns are nice, but I need a living
so I can get all life is giving,
but I don’t drive...

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I’m going to turn a new green leaf
No more Ms follow the rules
I’m going to be a woman so naughty
That lights the eyes of guys...

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Certain yarns with needles knit
Are not strong and likely will split
So please keep in mind
The seamstress is kind
And insists on try-ons for fit...

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At last, Mr. J Bugman is now a retired Judge-man.

For many years he has punished many, spared few.

His verdicts never alter even if there is...

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“Don’t you look nice!”, the waitress said
she left to get our ordered bread
	as his black coffee cooled
	he said, “You’ve got her fooled,”
and I went home...

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What if Santa snuck up on you?
Leaned in and whispered, I ‘Gotcha’
Look at you, ducking and dodging
All year round he has been watching 
Shorten that...

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IN THE MONTH OF MAY
                    ...

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There is a rare and special creature
lost in the mists of time
women search so far and wide
for a nice man divine

He hides away in a...

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My wife said to me
She didn't feel well,
And if I don't mind, would I cook.
I told her to lay down
And have a good rest,
While I...

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Hurray, hurray!
It’s a special day.
Grandma’s counting beans. 

Pick the rocks, 
Turn down your socks.
Grandma’s counting beans. 

In the pot, 
That’s what she taught.
One, two and...

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An ode to Hillary
Although the years have slowed your step, Hillary, you’re the man. You tried your best, but failed the test, maybe you shouldn’t...

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How... Floe N'ice Tubby In The Throes...
(breaking free of writer's block)

Asper this instance,
     when a dearth of ideas 
  ...

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My better other half 

Who I call Secsee

Today did say to me 

If you wish to continue our sexual liaison's 

Or want me to have...

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I am taking a nice relaxing bath
At 2,000 miles a minute
Tossing buckets of water over my head,
Faster than age 2 does it,
Even letting some fly...

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Two prates,

sick paste,

wanton waste,

yet terrible brain.


One more way,

for me in the daze,

then the song with the wait,

then the bong and your faith-

yes it's gone,
but no...

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