Lumberjacks Poems | Examples

Caloric Conundrum

The cheesecake in the bakery I want to devour,
dag-gone my crumbling willpower!
It's cherry topping so high,
makes me want to cry.
I walk on past the candy aisle,
and gaze at the cereal shelves awhile.
Euell Gibbon's "sticks and pebbles"
Grape Nuts brand-
that kind of breakfast I cannot stand.

Give me a cupcake piled with frosting,
never mind, the "guilt calisthenics" 
afterwards would be exhausting!
Stepping on the scale I hate,
I'd much prefer Kit Harington was my date,
yes, that's quite a fantasy,
so bugger off- I'm in my sixties!

My slim grandchildren eat like lumberjacks,
I gain easily, my metabolism is wack,
their ice cream consumption is legendary,
as I scowl eating yogurt and boysenberries.

If there is a monument somewhere for us
who try to lose weight,
before they engrave my name on, do hesitate,
as I'm hiding in my room and munching
in the dark,
peanut butter patties Girl Scout cookies-
but don't give me any snark!

Photo of Lumberjacks

The lumberjacks were talked into the photo.
It is in grayscale of course, this being 1911.
Colored photographs were not dreamed of yet.
Seventeen lumberjacks were rounded up for the photo.
When the photo was developed two extra men appeared
Who are these guys? The younger ones asked.
The new guys did not recognize them either.
They were standing next to you, Tom, someone said.
Tom did not remember seeing them.
Finally the photograph made it to the eyes of Donald.
He had been lumberjacking the longest.
Pete Johnson and Willy McCormick, he said.
Pete was killed in an accident in Oh six.
I think Willy was murdered in Oh eight.
No one looked at the photo the same after that.

Lumberjacks

[This little note is a word to the Woke…
(that’s people who can’t take a joke).
I hereby point out to avoid criminality
Murphy and Pat are of no known nationality…]

              ***

Patrick and Murphy had little to do
They feared their financial position
While looking for jobs they heard there were a few
At the forestry commission

Working outdoors was what they both desired
They hopped on the very next bus
Murphy said look there’s Tree Fellers required
But Pat said… there’s just two of us

              ***

[Based on a joke first published as a cave painting!]

The Talking Pine Cone

Can pine cones actually predict how harsh winter will be?
If a harsh winter is on the way, pine trees create more pine cones.Thinking if squirrels & birds share their opinion on the coming season, they will collect more pine seeds & stock up ahead of time 

Atop a decorative table a basket of pinecones sit festive and clean 
No resin to speak of no brittle edge left, from the forest of dreams 
A little girl with a tub full of glue stickied and sparkled until two    
Til' a pinecone flew out of the pile and yelled,    "Tell me, what is new! "   
They talked for a while then, she hopped into bed;  
Santa arrives with a jolly old bounce, leaving a doll with a flounce   
Down in the valley the lumberjacks cut, but up in the Country their sought  
Thank God for the pinecones that talk and for those that do not  
Its gonna be a long cold winter so "wear your winter mitts"
says the pinecone to a Jolly Santa, who jiggles and jangles 
then laughs with a tickling fit...
Atop a decoartive table the pinecones arranged all with shine,  
ready for a Christmas of love, that arrives just on time.

Antique Loggers

It’s a romanticized picture
hanging on my dining room wall,
1907 lumberjacks,
one perched atop lumber stacked tall.

It’s winter, and they have a sled
pulled by two horses, looking bored,
twelve-foot pile of logs they pull,
one teamster with long reigns aboard.

It’s somewhere in the wilderness,
the nothing of northern New York,
four men on foot stand alongside,
dressed in wool for cold winter work.

One holds an axe, that one looks young,
all wear bootpacks over their pants,
with hats and mustaches of old,
looks like a job for a real man.

The trees are dyed in sepia,
the colors are gradings of gray,
it’s the type of nostalgia that
just takes a worried mind away.

Compared to typing on a screen
it seems quite appealing to me,
then I stop and remind myself
most of them never reached sixty…

Halloween Screams

Halloween is a scream dressed in orange and black
A night of sneaky creeps that rattle and clack
Vampires conspire to send midnight bat attacks
Witches stirring cauldrons of potent purple snacks
Moonlit foggy streets filling with ghoulish packs
Of superheroes, princesses and lumberjacks
Cowboys with space toys and candy laden sacks
Evil clowns with smiles painted on out-of-whack
Hobos and gypsies from the wrong sides of the tracks
Mad hatters and kooky-eyed conspiracy quacks
Unlucky thirteens losing their crackerjacks
Curses from broken mirrors and stepped-on sidewalk cracks
Better give up the goodies if you don't want payback!

10/25/21

lumberjacks

lumberjacks fell on their knees

when the woods ran out of trees

no thought to give in

and after a spin

were soon modeling dickies.

My Tree

I rest 
I rest on a stump
the trees gone

My tree
I planted it
watered
nurtured,pruned

Watching it grow, sturdy and determined 
against life's insults and snubs

My tree
I left alone because it reached the required height, I took care it didn't get Dutch Elm disease or some other blight.
Still this healthy tree has felled surely as if by a lumberjacks hand
I rest on the stump because I am tired 
and it is what I know,
It's what I do now.

This mussing, its not a
"Giving Tree" fable,
cautionary tale or lecture about randomness. 

It's a spotlight on my illusion of protection 
I can't really protect him against much
maybe 
a winter flu 
or Dutch Elm.
certainly not Schizophrenia

Sonorous Insult

(after Robert Desnos)
 
I spit in the eye 
of the father of the bride 
of the blacksmith who made the axe 
with which the lumberjacks 
cut down the big old oak 
with a hundred lusty strokes 
and which they split in half 
and from which the bed was carved 
(with a swag of fruit and leaves) 
in which the fellow was conceived 
who became the great-grandfather 
of the guy with the massage parlor 
where, provocatively clad, 
your mother met your dad.

The Lgbt Club

Announcing it in the paper that day,
the LGBT club soon got under way,
meeting at Bruce's bike shop on their harley's,
is where they'd all meet before going on their journey,
some newcomers arrived as well,
and from the looks of them couldn't
tell if they were a woman or a fella,
some looking kind of like Mrs. Doubtfire,
while the younger ones like a Caitlin Jenner,
Bruce started scratching his head
and started to wonder,
why all of a sudden his club was so full of transgender's,
then he realized when he looked at the paper ad,
that he had to change the clubs lettering just a tad,
because his Lumberjacks Go Biking Tuesday's club,
was not going to be used anymore after that 
coming out masquerade fad!

Just For the Crack

condoms should be used on every conceivable occasion
remember Ballet is best learned using proper steps and stages.
every tree is relieved when Spring comes
a shotgun wedding: A case of wife or death.  
the dairy industry in the Middle-East depends on milk shakes.
every lumberjacks can keep accurate records because they understand logs.

look Once you've seen one shopping centre, you've seen a mall.
if you want good feedback ask any road-roller driver - they are natural flatterers.
fields of bare brown earth can be a harrowing site
every marriage, she got a new name and a dress.  





sorry soup all stolen from Google , was going to be for Christy teas comp 

This world is full of enough negativity. Any style give me a positive outlook on life. Hint: I'm fond of a play on words.

spells create life down the side and lots of word play put I can't enter it lol  smile value only :-)

Woodsmen Day

Woodsmen Day ( Poem)

Sport using handsaws
With a toothed edge blade
One or two handed sawing
On a woodsmen fair day

Traditional log rolling
Is a lumberjacks technique
Style used in river driving
The illustration is unique

Springboard tree is branchless
With live action you can’t beat
 Platform board is dangerous
A risk if you compete

Block ax chopping
Is a loggers sport indeed
Hard on your back swinging
Be careful of your feet
					
Woodsmen day activities
Is part of the fair you see
I bring it all to my channel
Cause that’s the place to be

By: Doris Anne Beaulieu
At :  https://www.youtube.com/user/Viewwithme2

Divided

Powerfully pandered not pondered and plotted 
Ostensibly organic not overtly originally spotted
Liars lipping lethargic lies lavishly construed and truly
Ire inducing ignorance imputing irresponsible foolery
Terrorizing timid tepid taxpayers to respond fast
In an impatient ill illegal inconceivable idiotic mad blast
Callously cold and cantankerously conniving bastards
Assiduously aspiring and aggravating masses mastered
Low lying lingering and living Luddite like lumberjacks
Limping 'long labored roads ludicrously lacking facts
Yet yearning yearly for yuppy snacks


 they wouldn't even know what to do with it, nor deserve it.

Splinters Left In Mind

By the time I saw
a feller for the trees
the lumberjacks had moved in
and cut me in half


A piece of me here 
shards there
still nothing
of substance remained


so I trapped the wind
into my apathy,
and bore titanic gusts
throwing four seas
into eight deserts
till


buried in the earth
but raising 
to move mountains aside
I vomit ash
and sing with a spray


crusts were broken
in communion
with cicadas,
the sacrament
burned my lips to the mantle


and the word was all mighty
until it became a mantra
for an obsession of the insane
drinking poisoned truths 
till petals of yellow
fall on the grass
in the confusion of seven


—


if any vision or dream
burns too bright
shadows pale the heart


and the rot draws flies

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