Long Huckster Poems

February 27th, 2018 literary tinkering rejiggered October 11th, 2024

I believed fortune cookie maxim 
cryptic message couched
Apple Macbook Pro update process
alternately titled “markedly 
a Luke warm welcome Matt unfurled
courtesy Jimmy John,
who embarked on 
imp apostle bull...

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Limericks IV - Donald Trump

The Hair Flap
by Michael R. Burch aka "The Loyal Opposition"

The hair flap was truly a scare:
Trump’s bald as a billiard back there!
The whole nation laughed
At the state of his graft;
Now the...

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Spirit and sponsor sane sexagenarian scribe (and his spouse) to a Utopian country

He seeks (in tandem with the missus) 
legal asylum in Canada...
New Brunswick, Newfoundland, 
Nova Scotia, et cetera,
or any other socially 
progressive European country,
and...

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Sane sexagenarian scribe seeks asylum in Canada...

should Trump swindle electorate by hook or crook,
(1003 days, 9 hours, and
32 minutes until 2024 election),
yours truly steels, girds, braces... himself,
and plots serious outlook
pondering exiting United States
(stage door left)
while...

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It’s Sunday afternoon and several of us, Leong, Sunny, Anna, Lisa and her new BF Dave (well, he isn’t ‘new,’ he’s 26) and I are watching an NFL football game. The Eagles vs the Jets.

There’s...

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Yukon just coon sitter me a copacetic, energetic, ironic language lover (English is ma lingua franca late mother tongue), who waxes poetic, but tall so one babbling, creaking, and dabbling dis arming marine naval (gazing)...

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Courtesy handy dandy
palmar hyperhidrosis
impossible mission to defeat
except poe wet tickly
even courtesy drysol.

(Me slippery fingers slither,
slip and slide splashing ala
Jackson Pollock), sans slap
dash experimental, swiftly

tailored and harried writing
style, yes on par with purging,
spewing, venting...unexpurgated,
unexpressed, unexplained... 
words,...

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(Me slippery fingers slither,
slip and slide splashing ala
Jackson Pollock), sans slap
dash experimental, swiftly

tailored and harried writing
style, yes on par with purging,
spewing, venting...unexpurgated,
unexpressed, unexplained... 
words, which this Engelbert

Humperdinck singer/songwriter,
(whose name inexplicably popped
into the mind of this...

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OUR LIBRARIAN

I once remember the
Librarian in my college  
Meticulous ,and savvy
His love for knowledge 
Knows no bound.  

I once remember the 
Librarian in my University
A man with a large heart for others 
His...

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By Then It Be To Late
By Roy Merritt

I suppose it isn’t just people subject to intoxication 
If your citizens all taking toxins apt be your nation 
How eager a man be to martyr himself for...

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The King of Trumpland

From TV land and a brash hotel
Appeared a huckster who lived to sell
Dreams to those who longed to hear
A voice free of bull, pity and fear,
Selling the dream of a new frontier,
He...

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My mother thinks I'm a doctor
I just don't have the guts
To tell her I spent all my college doe
On beer, wine, women and such

So after I faked my graduation
Said I was moving to the South
To...

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Ice cream and ices, ice cream and ices
Get your fudgywugies here is screamed
Heard clear emerging from the tunnels
Under the boardwalks promenade shadows 
Loud and clear come good humor men in white
Ridiculous in their black shoes...

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Two Words
 
Dream
Scheme

Beam
Team

Shout
Pout

Duel
Shot

Life
Death

Brain
Drain

Stupid
Cupid

Dumb
Numb

Rum
Thumb

Prosecute
Electrocute

Einstein
Infinity

Immigrant
Us

Atom
Bomb

Strength
Weakness

Love
Hurt 

Fate
Destiny

God
Cosmos

Lucifer
Lost

Passion
Torpid

Feelings
Flatline

Politician
Huckster

Glorious
Despicable

Moon
Mars

Space 
Race

Beguile
Style

Truth
Lie

Cake
Pie

Bicycle
Tricycle

Car
Jar

Balloon
Burst

First
Last

Lust
Like

Fist
Fight

Right
Write

Left
Deft

Genius
Idiot

Manners
Rude

Give
Take

Rate
Deflate 

Washington
Jefferson

Hamilton
Burr

Trump
Nixon

Hitler
Wotan

Karloff
Lugosi

Frankenstein
Dracula

Foot
Fall

Think
Blink

Popcorn
Unicorn

Coffin
Fly

Fish
Fry

Good
Bad

Think
Drink

Smile
Scowl

Teeth
Towel

Grimace
Ace

Lash
Bash

Date
Hate

Hurry
Wait

Freeze
Animate

Brave
Wave

Holocaust
Heydrich

Fool
Drool

Slob
Blob

Dead
Undead

Alive
Thrive

Evolution
Revolution

Vampire
Umpire

Wire
Dire

Flour
Flower

Alien
Robot

Klaatu
Gort

Tower
Power

Rush
Hour

Talk
Walk

Hysterical
Empirical

Gary Bateman, Copyright © All Rights Reserved
July 8, 2018 (Short-Form Free Verse)...

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I saw a buggy at the antique store today, its beauty unsurpassed!
I couldn't help but sit and muse awhile about its esoteric past.
It was shiny black with roll-up curtains to fend the stormy weather.
Its lone...

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Nails are common fasteners in the carpentry trade
And for DIY enthusiasts, as well.
When considering the varieties of nails,
It’s a counter-intuitive fact that cut nails, 
With their angular shafts and blunt tips,
Work better than drawn wire...

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'Umbrella Jim' was the sneakiest scoundrel west of the Missisip'!
Usin' the shell game and sleight of hand, of yer purse he'd gyp.
He'd set up shop 'neath an umbrella whether inside or under an oak.
Usin' three...

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Democracy hating, dictator loving,
media baiting, neo-Nazi hugging
... Duck! Donald
I heard someone in the rally crowd cry,
then I saw a blurred object come flying by
Someone lobbed a hard truth brick,
and hollered, start building your wall with...

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You'd hear them every morning
Like a band of baritones
The echoes of the horseshoes
Clacking, on the cobblestones
Each huckster with a wagon
Pulled behind a blindered roan
Parading back and forth between
The rows of old brownstones

One would have fresh...

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Hope forewarned
 Such was Jeremiah's call:
 Go, tell my people what I'm going to do;
 Know that they will not listen to you.

 Hope forlorn
 determining the odds on a bet:
 You choose this or...

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Just an SUV driving, habitually late American man
High on coffee, low on energy and full of raisin bran
Lured by the social network swept into the dustpan
Looking for lost memories, old friends and a new plan
Never...

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I sought to write verse tried and true, 

But jester scuttled my muse making me blue.

I responded with childhood rhymes I once knew,

Yet that clown pilfered all and then withdrew.

Rebounding, I sought rhythm's cadence to...

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