Long Hernia Poems

Offering Thanks to the Lord

                        Accept my thanks, Merciful Lord,
  ...

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There’s a man across the ward from me with a hearing aid that whines,
‘Old age coming on you see, I’m only seventy-nine.
Me hernia’s shot, and so’s me sight, my specs they’re thick like bottle.
But, I...

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Coming of the Magi
Matthew 2.1-12

Verse 1: “After Jesus was born in Bethlehem...Judea,
During the reign of King Herod, magi came [Yeshua],
From the east to Jerusalem. 2 They asked: [aroma],
‘Where is the newborn king of the Jews?...

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Truly, the bee hive innards hum 
Truly, the body inside gurgles 
Truly, the cave echoes the vortex 

Truly I know these sounds 
from last night 
4 cackling creatures spewed 
their saturated sayings upon 
the floor...

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It was in the summer past,
When I had a raging cold.
I felt something move ‘down there’
It was protruding and bold.
 
No, it wasn’t my male part,
The lump was next to that.
I could feel a bit of...

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I recently visited an animal farm
Accompanied by my favorite school marm.
She said that the antics were fun to behold
Of creatures that acted outrageous and bold.

Well, I didn't believe her when first we arrived
'Cause all that...

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Lord! Why is it some folks consider it their solemn obligation,
To render unto me the details of their every operation?
No matter whence I go, I go with the expectation,
That about someone's operation I'll suffer an...

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O you who believe!Be you not like those Who annoyed Moses,
But Allah proved his innocence of that which they alleged, 
And he was honorable In Allah's Sight."Surah 33 Ayat 69"
Book 55 Hadith 616 Volume 4
Narrated...

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A neighbor lady I hadn’t seen
in a year I heard was bedridden.
Her former husband dropped by, 
asked if I'd to take in her trash can 
when I brought in my own.
He lived in a city...

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is it possible that i am doing this now
seems like just last lifetime i was eating cold french bread and just as cold lunch buckets in a parking lot
i think i still have the footprints...

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Emerald Faerie Princess was eager to Find Lord Dragon Master
She had heard that he could fly her to England much faster
So many said he would be hiding in a farmer’s sweet pasture.
She used her magic...

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In the main, it's a pain in the brain.
Now just try not to buy I could die.
Patiently wait. Think, my fate will be great.
Now I'm face'n the preparation for the operation.

Pray'n for grace. Turn my...

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Here's some things that really irk me
They must irk some of you guys too
Loaded baskets in those Express Lanes
My face turns a scarlet hue

Imagine the gall of some irksome drivers
Doing fifty in a fifty mile...

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It's impossible to hum with your nose blocked
Don't try it you'll give yourself a hernia
About two hundred babies are born every minute
Guess there's not much doing in suburbia
 
Dust under your bed is your own...

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It's impossible to hum with your nose plugged
Don't try it you'll give yourself a hernia
About two hundred babies are born every minute
Guess there's not much doing in suburbia

Dust under your bed is your own dead...

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i booked this trip
just to see the look
on your face

it sounds cliché, but
your reactions are 
priceless

when we get over that
bridge, i knew that i had
made the right choice

it is in the smile of your
voice

during this...

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Today's a day for all of soup to rejoice
For Ralph the poet has found his voice
He writes in rhymes but so do I
Don't tell him his words can make me cry

And I'll deny it until...

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The other fun things I love having include:Heart Failure, skin infections, painful 
umbilical hernia,heat stroke, gastritous, anemia, anxiety, high blood pressure,
dental pain unreal!, chronic nausea...and a few others to boot...I have been in 
every hospital...

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There's nothing funnier than a cross-eyed chicken
With legs the size of your arm
The Chicken Emporiums would sure love to know 
The name of this progressive farm

Aside from the unnerving cross-eyed feature
The implications are really immense
Imagine...

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There's nothing funnier than a cross-eyed chicken
With legs the size of your arm
Kentucky Fried Chicken would sure love to know 
The name of this progressive farm

Aside from the unnerving cross-eyed feature
The implications are immense
Imagine a...

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There's nothing funnier than cross-eyed chickens
With legs the size of your arm
Kentucky Fried Chicken would sure love to know 
The name of this progressive farm

Aside from the unnerving cross-eyed feature
The implications are immense
Imagine a leg...

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Igbo Sex Words I have observed
Are High-Low Tone steady bearers:
To ‘High-Low’ markedly reserved,
Save in ears of tone-deaf hearers…

All her words for Male Genital
Picked by ears not from hospital
And Females’ one’s ears digital;
To Proof subject in...

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I once had corrective surgery, a hernia operation,
and was asked if I would authorize a scan of my palm,
so that in the event I showed up unconscious during an emergency,
they could access my medical records...

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Hot shot in my head writhing the guz let it swim in the round to twirl around the world charm junky paty you can see it Jennifer can't wait can you dusty cobwebs frothing mouth...

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Went to St Richards early today
Had an appointment so that was okay
The problem is this; I went in with a hernia
But when I came out... I had hyperthermia

Whilst no radiator did radiate heat
And I was...

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