Long Frighteningly Poems
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Written: April 27, 2025, for contest by Anoucheka Gangabissoon
Quote: "Your task is not to seek love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it." By Rumi
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When love weakens, a vacuum remains,
A canvas painted with countless shades of gray.
Laughter fades into a quiet pain,
And joy shifts into a foreboding sway.
A world of vibrant colors unfolds before you,
Yet now dull tones steal away a fading dream.
The echo of your presence hits frighteningly true,
A spectral grip, a limitless gleam.
Once filled with laughter, now it's a mournful sigh,
Craving the touch of a once-lovely grace.
My spirit shrinks and begins to softly die,
As darkness stretches across my face.
Yet a spark still flickers amid gloom,
An unknown strength; a will to rise anew.
A phoenix emerges from the grave of doom,
A reborn self, strong, courageous, and true.
Though love may have faded, a lesson shines bright;
To spot the beauty in a tightly clenched shell.
To conquer suffering, I must stand and fight,
Learning to love myself and embrace the tale to tell.
Accept the love that escaped you,
Love is not a feeling, but rather a choice.
Being able to love is even more untrue,
A strong love adorns our lives with rejoice.
initially I saw no humanoid qualities in the beast
he was a throwback, not orangutan, but not man either
his eyes were frighteningly dark with glowing suns in the center
how could I communicate with this being?
I heard a thought in my head that I knew was not mine
okay, he can implant thoughts, so is he reading mine?
I tried to be more careful about what I thought
desperately not looking at his jagged teeth
they were stained a crimson red
was he a cannibal?
He threw back his head and howled
it was a mysteriously infectious sound
I threw back my head and howled too
we might not be the same species
but it was kismet that we landed on the same island
it had been a day since I saw another survivor from the plane
a tattooed teenage boy who had run off into the jungle
a few minutes later, I heard shrieks and screams
I plan to stay here, I told the beast, as I built a fire.
He gave me a slow smile and I wondered if I would be his dinner.
On the battlefield fights a maiden so fair.
With her blood soaked golden hair.
She fights for the right to be free.
To live her life as she wants it to be.
With sword and spear.
She boldly fights without fear.
Men fall at her feet
Their blood soaks the young wheat.
She cuts and jabs many have died at her hands.
They don’t know her name or where from she came.
She is the vision of an angel.
But her price is death.
Her reward is your life in her hands.
Then she kills you so your blood floods the land.
But one who sees her through the haze.
Has no remorse if he has to kill.
She is just another warrior she will bleed.
He rides towards her on his black steed.
She ducks her head and moves to the side.
And with one swift move removes his head
He lies there now hes the one dead.
There comes a time when too much blood has been spilt.
It covers her sword from the blade to the hilt.
She looks round at all the dying.
The screams the cries. The clash of steel.
The scene has become a nightmare.
So Frighteningly surreal.
The time came when her life had to end.
In the darkness a small light glows.
In the distance the faces of slain men.
They greet her as friends and she learns
This is what life is. it has no end.
Sandals
On a golden sandy beach.
On a dusty dry footpath with warm air
around your feet.
Music.
Spanish guitars play sounds so sweet.
The evening light is warm and friendly,
the night sky blends into the ocean as
the waves lap at your feet.
A stark sound, a whale crashing helplessly
on the beach.
Bird flight, low level their squawking
screeching, nothing normal is here to
let them feed.
Tide rise, the ocean sounds darker with
fiercer speed. It seems to be saying
something but we don’t listen we just
use it to fill our bellies with selfish greed.
Night sky the moon hides behind the dark
clouds.
Rain comes out of nowhere and
rain comes falling down so heavy the ground
can’t cope and neither can the streets!
People.
People crying on flooded streets.
Their homes now under water, along with their
lives, their belongings, and their dreams.
Nature.
I hear it screaming in the winds.
I stop and turn to face it and I see it look at me.
Like a kraken raising an eye out of the ocean
it wants me to know it’s upset with us,
so upset indeed.
Feelings.
Scared now of forces we can’t control or see.
The dark side of humanity still taunting and
laughing at nature as nature turns around and
glares at humanity so frighteningly!
I could be a prima ballerina or a semi driver
could rename myself McCellihouti or McGiver
could become a psychologist, biologist, zoologist,
anthropologist, or an ultra-mologist.
My therapist stops me.
What is an ultra-mologist?
It’s a person who trains for every position just in case.
In case we get to live under the ocean or outer space.
I am not discounting any ideas, for they are all great you see.
Might even become an explorer and discover an unknown sea.
I could be a pirate queen and make others walk the plank.
Could become a wayfarer like my Uncle Hank.
I am open to any profession, for I am great at everything.
Can dance, knit, work on car engines, what will my life bring?
This might seem braggadocio from another.
But I am brilliant and talented – just ask my mother.
Life cannot put any limits on me, you see.
I am confident and wild and wooly and free.
You tapped my shoulder, lightly…eagerly…
Before it happened, I sensed your eyes,
And I turned ever so slightly,
Your face in the corner of my eye
Your face…it was serious…
As if getting my attention was a chore
It was a chore…to withhold all my tears…
I absolutely love you—how sickened I am…
You crush me in your green eyes…
Those words…though few, annihilate me
I am certain in your mind you were pleading for words
You wanted to flee from my sight, but I was there first
Sketching on my notebook, a girl in love-verse
I know you meant to speak to me,
To get it all over with…
So that the chore could be over
And you could return in your shell
As I wallow in the suspense of my nervous hell
I was not waiting for you to speak…
I heard your mind before your hesitant touch
As if you were fooling with fire…
And I licked your fingers with burns
I cherished your pained attention
How foolish, how pitiable…
I felt much, when you tapped my shoulder,
So restlessly, so quickly, so frighteningly…
I turned my head at you…
The chance was yours to take
I never meant to burn you…
Now, alone, I must settle with your ashes……..
Of course not, you don't mean it
No one ever does
The new sacrificial lamb at your foul altar
Lost among historical fuzz
Should we live another century
The history books will claim
It was a violent tragedy
For which villains we must blame
But villainy is frighteningly common
When the status quo is shaken
Millennials cling to Harry Potter
And our lives are forsaken
"Quiet you, it's not so bad,
Now vote for your slow death."
To use us for sweet brownie points
And damn us with your next breath
It's never offering a lifting hand
Or a place onboard the Ark
It's always shame and scarce-veiled threats
Of leaving us in the dark
Clinging to false roles you learned
When you were but a teen
Biology is so much more
Yet you hide behind a screen
Cover your eyes, state your pride
Say you're better than the rest
Yet cast your lot with abusers
Since nicely they were dressed
I've no faith in baby blue
That shade has become red
Because I've seen you in sheep's clothing
Wishing that I was dead.
I've known my love for what now seems to be a long time
And yet I'd forced myself not to acknowledge it
Not to let my heart intrude upon the determination of my mind
I'm dying for your love
I wish to dig your heart out and drink your blood
Now, words seem to beat against me as if someone else was saying them
Repeating them over and over again until they drummed in my ears ,growing louder and louder
Until my whole body vibrated to the rhythm of it
Oh darling I'm dying for your love
Though I'd never told you
You must have been aware
That my heart turned over whenever our eyes met
I yearned for you the very moment i saw you
I remember how beautiful you'd appeared as you walked towards me
We kissed as you made your way down to the garden of eden
Atleast I'll have that to remember
I admit now that since then I'd not gone to sleep
Trying to recapture the feels of your lips on mine
The strength of your arms when you held me against you
That kiss has spoilt me
Because never again would it be possible for another being to touch me
Even on the hand without feeling revolted by it
Now one , two ,three,twelve hours before midnight
When he kissed my hand
I felt a cold shiver run through my veins
As almost as if his lips had been those of a reptile
But then insidiously, frighteningly so
The fact was born in upon me that he was man enough to want more from me than a kiss
There had been a look in his eyes as he spoke which was impossible to misinterpret
Had he approached me closely I'd want to run panic stricken to safety
And what did safety mean ever since i entered the love era except you ?
I love you ..i love you
And as always i go back to the same drumming and throbing sound within my heart
The same yearning which prevaded my whole body
Like an aching wound until i knew
It was impossible to face life without you
So here we are
now together in this eternal circle
around death's latest victim
in our apartisan lives.
We pause,
each to invite a quieter humbling access
to silent comfort
from this ministering circle
Each, and together,
facing this our inevitable personal
frighteningly human,
naturally spiritual
and inspirationally natural trauma
Asking forgiveness from ourselves
and each Other in this soon parting Circle,
letting go of flawed relationships
in which we have done and said,
and too often not peacefully done
and said,
harm to ourselves
and to these encircled Others
Here doing our health and wellness best
we can
knowing some days and nights
like this death day,
with nighttime fears
and angers against cruel
and unusual mortality,
we will add to our shared ecology
and theology
of Trauma:
[invite Circle to add their own feelings]
Loss
Suffering
Pain
A degenerating climate
Hopelessness
Despair...
Yet, also in this Sacred Pause
before dispersing
shared Death's hard inevitability,
we may also invite remembering
this our circling resonance,
When,
in our most robust compassion moments,
health care giving
is also wealth receiving resilient
brilliant,
physically empowering
and spiritually enlightening
We embrace
and celebrate our recircling Trauma facing
sacred place
warmly regarding space
For all that we have said and done
and have not said and not done
from heart-felt compassion
with ________________;
[full name of deceased/ing]
This inside silent day
and dark night,
and those before
and yet to come
trusted truths
and healthiest beauty
Circles gathering Earth's compassion
celebrating this sacred pause
in our wealth of healthcare lives
encircling death's departure.
It was not yet night, it was dark
I was not thinking, I have a thought
I can hear the beating of my heart
The end can finally begin, I cannot
I can read the words in my mind
But to the silence about I cannot say
This dark, a given darkness to shine
Did my eyes flicker? Yet they turn, they sway
I started to feel for things... I touch
There wasn’t yet to be, I... cannot yet see
It was frighteningly beautiful as such
Yet to see not... I am blind, I can only be
An illusion, an imagination, a delusion
I can neither feel or see, either touch nor hear
A distinction, a resolution, an obligation
I can neither heal nor be... either parch or fear
It has fallen into night, it was dark
I can yet see what I see not, I cannot
I can hear only the thumping of my heart
I begin to think... the end was my thought