Long Fire brigade Poems

Once again it’s Saturday; the day when footy reigns supreme.
The Dogs are up against the Cats, the premier favoured team,
but I’ve got no doubts the mighty Dogs will surely cope with that.
I couldn’t think of...

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Chernobyl.


A nuclear disaster, in the Russian town Chernobyl,
An odor-less killer, the invisible force.
As the radiation escapes, from the crumbling reactor,
We must cool it down, before it blows.


Evacuate Pripyat, the employee’s town,
The town of 35000; first...

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Unquotable quotes: Fat People – XXIX

(I know this piece sounds mean and cruel but as every single parent must have experienced, this is also the expression of utter exasperation, and perhaps there’s also the slightest...

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Unquotable quotes: Beggars - XXX

Who said beggars cannot be choosers?

Who chooses for them the place, the moment or the people they choose to beg from; the hours of the begging day; the alms they refuse;...

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I never knew that Stonehenge refers to hanging gallows


While solstice gives solace as the sun dial moves forth

Many years of mysteries immortalized for sacred worship

	Blue Stones transported from Pembrokeshire

	For a giant Cromlech by magic or...

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Now I probably would have stayed out if I had not known for a fact that
LaDonna  Poirret had been allowed entrance and she had never hand washed his dirty socks before a game and...

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Our dear leader
Our favorite President
President Trump
Once again

Interjected himself
Into areas that he knows nothing about
Making a fool of himself 
In the process

Why does he do this?
Time after time
Talking nonsense
It is because

He is the smartest man
In the...

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Oh gosh, what memories pancakes brings back to me …
As a child I used to make them every week for my dad
He adored them but I never ate them! It’s been many years since I...

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IF EVER I HAD A COUNTRY : LXII - LXIII

			LXII

If ever I had a country with streets under graffiti
And if ever I were the Minister of Transport who travels about for free
I'd give a free...

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First, you need to mix the potion.
You must read the instructions very carefully
You don’t want to be summoning up any old witch.
So make sure it’s the October manual.
Especially as we know what happened last year.
How...

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1	
the goose is putting signature
on the plume detaching from its tail

the queue is overflowed with crowd

groping in the memory of the gathering people 
so many safety pins and cello-tapes
are found  

on the shoulders of...

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Twenty odd years ago I was driving towards Oxford. As I came round a bend there were three vehicles involved in a horrific crash. I was first on scene so called 999 and reported it.
The...

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Dear Sir or Madam

I’m not in the habit of talking to air
But just for the moment I’ll talk like you’re there
My mind isn’t closed to your actual existence
My doubts are not simply a stubborn resistance

But...

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There's a breed of Aussie hero who has served this nation well 
and they don a yellow uniform to face the fires of hell. 
When day temperatures are soaring and the high winds blow a...

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The old veteran leaned on his cane watching the passing parade,
The usual equestrians, John Deere tractors, the local fire brigade.
With a trembling hand he saluted Old Glory as it passed by.
His chest swelled with pride...

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Here we go,
We decided to go for a walk in the park 
I remember it was summer so the evening isn’t dark
Now me misses is not small
Rather large, but not tall

So we have to walk...

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Unquotable quotes – V

Constant dipping wears out the hardest bone.
Out of sight, out of bind.
Too many cooks spoil the school books.
Be a cuckoo and lay your eggs at the cuckold’s next door.
When lightning strikes, the...

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Her name was Methane Bertha
And if you met you'd know why
There's always a southern wind blowing
Everyone she meets holds their nose
And then says goodbye.

She eats nothing but sprouts coffee and beans
She has a massive deriaire...

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Ugah Fugah (A moralistic tale)

.Ugah Fugah lived in a cave, 
away back at Earths dawn. 
You would have really liked him. 
( he never cut the lawn.) 

Now eating was a hassle, 
there was no...

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Benedict was tired, he’d been driving all day.  
This was his last delivery, 2 tonnes of eggs delivered to Safeway.  
The kid came out of nowhere, stared Benedict in the face,
He tried to...

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Mabel was so busy knitting baby things  she sold them at the fair
Used spiders webs as knitting wool or sometimes babies hair

Sent her friend Beryl searching for more to finish the bonnet she was...

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My next door neighbour told me a funny story the other day
It’s about Phyllis who lives down the road
She was out with her fancy piece called Tommy getting laid
Having a bonk in his car down...

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HOUSE ON FIRE

       If house catches fire,
        on instant reflex action, I will call Fire Brigade and make hurry
   ...

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The sixth of July, the postman passed by
The stork brought little old me
Come rain or come shine I’d want to know ‘why?’
And wrote my name when I was three 
I’d read and I’d write whatever...

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New York times and Washington post, better watch
The reports in the columns you host, keep within any
Remit, for the wokesters wish to poke' specially those in
The big-house, who'll treat as serious any old joke'
Don't be...

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