Oh My Back

My next door neighbour told me a funny story the other day It’s about Phyllis who lives down the road She was out with her fancy piece called Tommy getting laid Having a bonk in his car down a country lane She was there with her legs open not thinking of her husband Going at like a prize stallion chasing a filly winning his race Then Tommy cried out in pain and started crying Phyllis thought he was joking about ‘Oh damn it! My back has gone Phyllis! Call the Fire Brigade!’ ‘You gotta be joking Kev. But hey! I love a man in uniform.’ Kev managed to reach his hands free kit and call 999 Within five minutes the fire engine arrived Four beefy firemen in uniform assessed the situation Hiding their smirks they planned what to do One fireman got the Jaws of Life from the fire engine It took several minutes to cut the roof off Kev’s Jaguar His expensive cool motor was now a convertible! Then over the next hour they slowly lifted Kev upwards And placed him in a rigid stretcher to minimise further injury An ambulance arrived and Kev was taken to hospital Phyllis got busy mucking and bucking each of the firemen In Kev’s convertible Jag which was now a grinding parlour... NIPPLE PASTE 2020 JIMMY BOOM SEMTEX