Long Eat less Poems

Wide-eyed and poised today, as I look at yesterday, I can see tomorrow.* If nothing else, yesterday taught me that tomorrow will be a little like today, because today has features of yesterday and tomorrow....

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The council meets, all hours, to hear old batty dames yell, what a *****,
we don't think she's a good person, because she doesn't look and act like us.

The soldier's hall considers, is it fair to...

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They told me
only one month left
that was two months ago.

They told me
do it right the first time
and it won't happen again
yet here we are.
AGAIN.

They told me
push through
and you'll get to where you want to be,
but...

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I will live in poverty again
I will eat less
Warm my home at 55 degrees
I will walk in thrift and dream in commonality again
I will tread gently
Walk faster
Work harder
I will face my tide of want with...

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Jack Sprat and wife Mary, lived in a glory of lemony, chiffon days;
Like maroon birds keep on singing, until the sunset, orange phase.

They were comfy and happy, like a picnic in lavish, emerald grass;
And had...

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Uncomfortable confronting 
your continuous consumption to which you're accustomed, 
the crunch, the chew, it's all you do, 
most munch at lunch while you the whole day through, 
can't get a grip like a hug holding...

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The alarm blasts me awake
From a fitful night’s sleep,
Another day of bills to pay
And promises to keep.
Dropping Patanol in my eyes 
As I attempt to slowly rise,
Feeling disparate deja vus 
As my morning coffee brews.

And...

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This is my story about Menudo, and not the boy band Menudo
Mexican Menudo soup, known as the breakfast of champions
It’s what borracho’s, and Ricky Martin and all el mundo saludo
Chili mix, cilantro and lemon or...

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I did notice that they do something wrong.
But when it was not related to me, but others, when the "do" was replaced with a "did" I didn't saw a reason to not share my love...

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The world, his wife, or her partner, and the kids
Are mostly upsized, overweight, bloated or even worse obese.
Millions of scientists, doctors and nutrients can't figure out why
Too many theories, too many claims and counter claims,...

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They don’t believe the Earth is dying
Slowly, painfully, day by day
They think that money can fix the problems
For the few they admit, they sit and pray

They think money can fix the problems
Surgeries to make you...

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A woman says to her dentist, “Don't know what's worse
Having a tooth pulled or having a baby”
Dentist says, “Must adjust the chair to make us more comfortable
So make up your mind, got others waiting”

A Chinese...

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I guess I'm what one would call a "Chocoholic" 
     I make trips to Wockenfuss Candies more than the average guy. 
 I wish I could only go on Valentine's Day,...

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Get in shape, lose some weight.
Every year it’s always the same.
Read a book, stay home and cook,
And I only have myself to blame.

Till some land, lend a hand.
You’d think that I’d be smart enough,
Cards to...

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You told me I could not.
You said it would never happen.
You told me these lies.
And so I never even imagined.

Your words filled my head.
With such hate and such disdain.
Your words flooded my mind,
As the alcohol...

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In the past I made many resolutions
To stop smoking
Eat less and exercise more
Go the gym
Walk the dog
Endure these activities
Even though they’re a complete bore

Although never quite successful
We all do it as an annual event
Do what...

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Join the runners at the line,
clean out all those pantry shelves.
Make a promise to spend time,
creating a healthy self.

Throw away all the junk food,
maybe head down to the gym.
Eat less, get more sleep, and walk,
try...

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Each animal was brought in and penned, and then the poor thing cornered 
Then in any barbaric way they so choose the animals are then slaughtered

And are as cut up, packed, and sold, to feed...

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Let's weigh in on all the people out there trying to lose weight
The makeup of our bodies we have had a long time to create
If it is easy to shed those unwanted pounds the task...

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For more 
sleep I will drink 
a few more beers, then I 
will sleep like a pooped baby 
all night.

Nothing 
in a bottle, 
nothing in a jar, and 
nothing in the cabinet but one 
something.

Your...

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A SCIENTIFIC DISCOVERY
A great discovery has been found,
It’s a wonderful scientific fact,
That chocolate now is good for you,
The Nobel prize is worthy of that

Chocolate was seen as the enemy,
Saying it would forever be on the...

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Time to change myself once more
It's my mantra every Sunday
Be good with food and have less wine
This always starts on Monday

Commence with gentle exercise
And eat a smaller ration
By Tuesday this is going well
I'm full of...

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Speak no ill of our 3 letter government agencies;
they are always watching out for our rights,
they are working for us.

Don't you know you are just peddling enemy disinformation!
Don't you know you are just repeating
conspiracy theories?
Nothing...

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The Coming Bacon Shortage

By Elton Camp

Even though the press release was mistaken,
It told of an unavoidable shortage of bacon

Then when it was picked up on the Internet,
Loads of worldwide publicity it did get

That fat &...

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It has been a long time 
Since I put paper to pen
Maybe I should revise it'
And then start again.

What happened to the pencil
How did the pen win
Was it actually paper
Or papyrus back then

My new glasses
Aren't...

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