Diet Starts Monday

Time to change myself once more It's my mantra every Sunday Be good with food and have less wine This always starts on Monday Commence with gentle exercise And eat a smaller ration By Tuesday this is going well I'm full of strength and passion It's Wednesday I am feeling weak I want to drink some claret I tell myself to carry on So instead I eat a carrot I put myself to bed that night Hoping not to suffer Tomorrow is another day Of course I'll be much tougher By Thursday I am back on track I'm feeling rather dandy I force myself to eat less snacks And have a little brandy By Friday it is getting tough I'm feeling so much weaker I pour a glass of cold crisp wine And then fill another beaker Come Saturday I am off the plan I've gelled into my sofa I fill my face with tasty treats And turn in to a loafer The sabbath day I carry on I may as well keep eating Hereafter I will start again And do it without cheating