Kerplunk Poems | Examples

Yeah, I know -- my poetic output contains a fair bit of junk but

Yeah, I know ~ my poetic output contains a fair bit of junk.
But then ~ even God created something called a skunk.
In the works of all unparalleled thinkers,
you can expect quite a few stinkers.
Most attempts at art never attain great heights ~
most just immediately go ~ kerplunk.
I don't take myself too seriously.
If ever I did, it was only deliriously.
I'm a straight, middle of the road kinda guy,
with an IQ neither too low ~ nor too high.
And as to whether I'll ever do anything significant in my life ~ 
please stand by.

Biscuits

What‘s better than a biscuit?

Hard to debunk 

Treasure trunk funk 

Should you let

It get wetter

Would you dare risk it?


The trick a quick dunk

Or could flunk..flick..kerplunk.. 

Mushy chunk sunk..messy junk

Slushy slunk..in the tea you drunk


So at your leisure

Pleasure one’s self

Don’t regret your stealth

Forget your health

Wealth beset on the shelf


So feeling restive?

Yearn for a digestive?

Appealing…suggestive

No shock..dark choc

What else will cut the mustard

With a brew…for a few bob

Recurring theme..does seem

Will always dream 

About a custard cream 

Almost sob…as I Lob

A hob-nob in me gob
 

Ta pour more cha

In fine fettle

Be a slob

Turn on the kettle

Bickies in the jar

On the sofa settle

Sins within tins

Spurn concern

Ignore the racket


As


Hats do doff

Knew from the off 

On a roll

The sole goal

Quaff another cuppa

Down your cake hole

Scoff the whole packet!

You've Been Sanctity Claused

I was a potato type of guy, forget the cookies and carrots, 
didn't believe in Santa nor Cinderellas with golden chariots .
Twas' late at night as I crunched my chips I watched  TV  
lo and behold what did I hear ? a large thump and a humf,  
coming from the chimney, Oh Dear ! 
He stomped and he clomped then he said to me,  
" You live like a pigster and where is your sister ? 
clean up your place, what the Hee!  " 
He held up a sock and my heart went KerPlunk  
as I watched him remove all my favorite junk...   
He then gave me a card that was both soft and hard 
dipped in gold.  It was lanced with a sweet magical stance.      
He then waited and hummed as he Jingle Belled some 
"It's time for my pension" he said, then he paused. 
 "Guess what ol' chap, you've been Sanctity Claused !"

Marvelling in the Pink afternoon

Marvelling in the pink afternoon, pretending
to crochet a drawstring. I’ve done it before,
at least once before, followed the pattern. Closed
the purse. I can’t nearly begin
to learn that not all things are meant
to bring pleasure to me…they are oft’ meant
to gift, to love, to let go
of. Don’t
pull too hard…enclose a piece of your heart
on a little toy ship…let the paper sailboat
head toward the pond-swan. Even
mom’s precious teacups sunk
to the glass bottom, broke
in pieces. Her words stay,
meaningful & meaningless.
She meant us siblings to cheek-kiss.
Dad’s eyes see through the glass bottom -
either smiling bright or sad if we fight,
so we mustn’t fight. Marvelling
in the pink afternoon, pretending
to pour tea. Laying linen
on familial laps. Kind cubes
of sugar, kerplunk, splash
about with leafy-hugs. the drawstring closes
over promising memories. Marvelling
in the pink afternoon, letting go of…

Kerplunk

Sometimes we get stuck in place
And all the dreams we used to chase
Have vanished, so it’s time to face
The fact our world has shrunken.

The plans and goals we’d once embrace
Have left without a single trace
And looking forward, we must brace
For hopes, once high, now sunken.

However, there’s a saving grace – 
We simply have to slow our pace
As lofty futures we erase,
Not letting any funk in.

Please Come Back

Old man bullfrog
Croaking at the pond
Splash, kerplunk!
Now he’s gone.

Wise old crow
Strutting in the grass
Caw! There’s a grub;
Flies off fast

Shh, there they are:
Fawn and doe
Snap! goes the twig;
Off they go

High in a tree,
Red-tailed hawk
Won’t let me close;
He won’t talk

Squirrels on the ground
Chasing tails
Missy scares ‘em off;
Never fails

Mister black racer
Warming in the sun
Slithers when we get there;
You’re no fun!

Wait, little friends,
We won’t attack
Just want to visit,
Please come back!

Endless Torrent

Multiple sources
combine forces to create
a mighty current.
Quiet babbling brooks become
a cacophonic thunder.

Arcing in sunlight,
a stone lands with a kerplunk,
sends water skyward.
Swept downstream, it vanishes,
no evidence of impact.

Countless words flood forth:
mirth, anguish, anger, joy, awe.
Cast into the soup,
briefly visible to all,
swept downstream into the void.

Over You

Here I am, sitting alone in my room:
There's nothing here but despair and gloom.
I cry when I see your picture in a frame
And whenever I call your name.
Time goes by really fast,
But things haven't been the same.
I only have myself to blame
For the costly mistakes I've made in the past.
Since you've been gone, I tried to move on:
But in reality, it's been difficult for me.
Your smile and laugh always brightens my day:
Now I'm distraught because you're far away.
I said that I needed to snap out of this funk,
Even though my heart just went "KERPLUNK"!
I never wanted to hear you say, "We're through!"
I'm dying inside with the tears I can't hide, 
And the only thing I have left is my pride.
Now I don't know what else to do,
But I miss you terribly and will never get over you.

Ripples Across the Lake

Ripples flow across the lake
A profusion of serpents swimming
Wriggling from shore to shore

Skimming stone takes four hops
causing rings to widen
Circles created by the hand of man
kerplunk, splish and splash 

Dragonfly perched on a cattail
flitting its wings in the air
making shadows that look like lace
Sunlight highlights them like prisms
sparkling in the peak of twilight

A frog jumps from a driftwood stump
half submerged among duckweed
Swirls of undulating wavelets

Wind driven movements
Riffling the surface
catch my eye
expanding ripples displayed
ripples across the lake

A Wee Orphaned Lad

There was a wee orphaned lad named Kerplunk
Poor kid wore clothes to school that always stunk
   The principal despaired
   Asked, 'Kerplunk, don't you care?'
Said Plunk: 'What if your new parents were skunks?'

Got Milk, a California Tale

She happily drove to the market,
To get food and things for her family.
Alas, how heartbroken was she!
With no dairy products in the store to see.
She drove home,sobbing ever so tearfully.

Then she spied some cows in yon meadow.
Aha, a light went on in her head, though!
I have a big silver bucket in my trunk.
She took it, under the cow's magic udders, 
it went, kerplunk!

She worked those udders till her bucket was full.
Ah, that joy she did it and was so successful!
With great joy and relief she drove home.
Knowing she lived in God's hands, a happy tome.






                        March 20, 2020
                            5am PST

Tom Boy

As a child I was called a Tom Boy,
following my twin brother like a shadow,
wherever he went I would tag along,
hanging out with school boys to belong.

Backyard kickball kept us out of trouble,
playing for hours during the summer,
I learned to play rough like the others,
being the only girl I considered them brothers.

The neighborhood park was our hangout,
this was where we would meet and greet,
toss a ball and climb a sturdy shade tree,
as an initiation the boys encouraged me.

Being the shortest member of the gang,
they hoisted me up the tall and leafy tree,
the sun was setting and I yelled to get down,
no one answered me as I cried with a frown.

What seemed like forever, my brother arrived,
he and a neighbor carried a wooden ladder,
placed it against the tall and rough trunk,
climbing down slowly I landed with a kerplunk.

Driving It Home

Dressed in spike shoes
And summer whites
He steps onto the manicured fairway
Heart in the game and focused

Toting proudly a new bag
With left-handed custom
Putters drivers and irons
Glistening in the sun

Studying every curvature of the lawn
He carefully analyzes distances
Sandy bunkers and water hazards
Pulling out the perfect driver

Defending his championship title
His tournament life on the line
Practicing the swing in his mind
Like he’s done a million times

Stepping up to the tee
A prayer under breath
Positioning the ball just so
There it is the perfect swing

In control of every motion
Everyone follows the flight of the ball
Towards the flag fluttering in the breeze
Kerplunk right in the victory cup

A hole in one !!
Crowd roars and there it is
The jubilant victory dance
And a kiss for that lucky driver



Published in my 24-page photo/anthology ~RANDOM MUSINGS VOL.1~ 2020

AP: 2nd place 2025, 2nd place 2022

Submitted on June 6, 2019 for contest DRIVER OF VICTORY sponsored by JULIA WARD  -  RANKED 2ND

Anyone Game

Guess who the mad gab is all about
It's us, a well known pack of old geezers
Old grandpas that are in trouble no doubt
Now most of us are coughers and weezers

It was a risk to be cool and not hide
Drawn to the taboo tobacco, that's right
While John and Paul sang ticket to ride
We would smoke that tobacco all night!

Some warned against it when sales began
Others would speak out and say balderdash
We are just cool like the Marlboro man
And for cigs, kerplunk, put down their cash

Our life has gone up in smoke it's true
Now we need oxygen close to our heads
But don't feel bad for this old sorry crew 
We do have some fancy hospital beds!




3/11/2019
For Anyone Game? contest
By Carol Connell

Utter Balderdash

"That's utter balderdash," I loudly screamed
you can't catch a dragon with a mousetrap.
This operation proves you have no clue
we're in trouble; put on your thinking cap! 

I'm sorry, but luck is not on our side
and we don't have the time for dissension.
Apples to apples we don't stand a chance
it's your life; you had best pay attention.

Jumpy, you're frightened of your own shadow
and before nightfall you'll be hearing things.
Setting traps is a total waste of time
it's a foolish plan, for dragons have wings.

You boggle my mind; I have to speak out
let’s let common sense affect the outcome.
Don't risk getting seen, until we spot it
and don’t attack it with pitchforks, that’s dumb.

We'll need to do everything in stealth mode
using a password other than guess who.
And by employing our wits, we’ll listen
for a kerplunk; dragons like water too.

And then we’ll fling out all our fishing nets
that we'll secretly prepare in advance.
And hope it gets hopelessly entangled
for I think drowning it is our best chance.

(Quatrain)


Mar. 04, 2019

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