I Phone Poems

I-phone-itis

I checked my e-mail
Deleted the spammer
Then fixed my “I phone”
With a store-bought hammer

The Dr. scheduled a video visit
I told him “I’d take a pass”
Cuz there’s no way I’m stickin’
My own finger up my a..

My “phone” and I 
Seem to disagree
‘bout who’s in charge
“IT” or me

I asked SIRI what do you think
“she” replied: I don’t
I just

Taken Hostage By An I Phone

Ouch! What had I hit with my left hand, on that side of the bed?
It was my I-phone, who should have been in the kitchen instead.
What are you doing here? I asked her, in a stunned kind of way.
Shut up you Peon!” she shouted at me; I could see she did not play.

If you want

I-Phone Interruptions

I-phone
seeks attention
constantly chiming sounds
irritating interruption
I-phone

Whiz Bang Chat This Morning

They had a whiz-bang chatter this morning.
A grandma grandson yackety-yak
Chatty Chat Chat Smile Laugh Laugh
On Facetime, an I-phone application

It was waggery talk
Mischievous but harmless
Nothing offensive was said
It brought a calm to both parties

The FaceTime concept less intimidating than I thought
At first it had bewildered and perplexed us
Grandma did not want to try it until this

My Phone Dings For No Reason

My phone dings for no reason.
I am not playing video games.
I am not trying to speak to a friend.

I am sitting in the living room
And I hear my phone dinging in the kitchen.
I pick it up and stare at it.

There are no alerts.
No messages.
No indicators at all.

I leave it in the kitchen
And it happens again

If You Want To Miscommunicate

If you want harsh feelings
If you strive to miscommunicate
If you adore confrontation
If you want hatred to call you out
If your brain is disengaged
If you do not remember how harsh written words are
If you love to miscommunicate
Text someone

Blue Tooth Ready

in case someone phones
i am wearing my headpiece
to no avail

anticipation
certainly blue tooth ready
it is sunday right

Taking a Selfie

He takes a selfie.
Eaten by a bear.
She takes a selfie.
Carried off screaming.
He takes a selfie.
Plunges to his death.
She takes a selfie,
Run over by a semi.
He takes a selfie.
Carried away by the flood waters.
Do any of the rest of you see a pattern here?

Word Game Obsession

I sit with two I-pads on my lap 
Four hours at a time
Sometimes six
Playing word games
Why two?
Because one is thinking
While I am pounding the keys on the other one.
I do not abide thinking time.
I have spent too many years wasting mine.
So now it is more precious
My husband walks through and speaks
Irritating me.
What was that word

Advice Today Different Than Maybe Yesterday

So I had to tell her to BLEEP off, Grandma.
She is fourteen, as of forty-six hours ago.
I am shocked.  
I wisely decide to give her some Grandmotherly advice.
Me:  Were there witnesses?
Molly: No.
Me:  Did anyone have their I-phone out?
Molly:  One, but I chased her down and smacked it out of her hand

Third Time This Month

Priscilla raced to her favorite spot to celebrate,
and take another peek at her prized possessions 
Her dainty, pointed to precision faerie ears.
She laid on her tummy on conglomerate cliff, 
Her favorite cliff, as it was made of pearls, shells, and diamonds

As her ginger hair spiraled toward the water's surface, she
relived the conversation with her mother.
"It

The Trick Was On Him

a reindeer with hooves so thick
thought he would really be slick
gonna use an I-phone
to tease his good friend Gnome
pushing the buttons was a trick!

Written 12-14-2018  Contest:  Funny Reindeer Limerick
                        

Talk, Rush, Bye, Click, Good Friends

Wearing headphones, every day, when I jump out of the car,
talking into my blue tooth, with one friend or another, so the
thirty-two minutes will not be a complete waste of time.

Home now, wanting to take a potty, jump into my pajamas,
and be left totally alone. 

But I owe them a little something for
entertaining me for

I-Phones

I-phones have changed our paradigms
People no longer
Have to talk to each other
Or
Need to form relationships with human beings.
Evolving into an electronic virtual culture,
Suddenly we live in a surreal, imitation world, and we are avatars, not humans.

I-Pad and I-Phone Annoyance

The I-phone buzzes off and on all night.
An annoying sound, perils of playing multitude of word games.
Mostly scrabble, but others. Bzz. Bzz. Bzz. Bzz. Bzz.
I turn it off, but the buzzing continues. In uneven intervals,
Not a pretty rhythm or sound.
My I-pad is a culprit now. It is now buzzing too.
How she linked up with my

• Short I Phone Poems
• Famous I Phone Poems
• Best I Phone Poems
• Read I Phone Poems
• Long I Phone Poems
• I Phone Quotes