Humorous Husband Poems

He thinks post nor prior, poor man’s married,
He looks but sees no more, poor man’s married.

Late from office and empty-handed still,
Now catches up with chore,...

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I made a good impression today April 19th, 2023...

getting fitted for a new pair of dentures
at Liberty Dental in Phoenixville, Pennsylvania;
The tab picked up courtesy
Aetna...

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Try mumbo jumbo chicken gumbo soup saith dumbo

Yours truly an unfortunate hostage
within *****sapien zoo
presenting poetic hodge podge 
and mish mash to you
looking for unwitting...

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A wise poet said:
“You are captain of your own ship!”
My employer said: “Not here, Buddy!”
My wife said, “Yes dear, after you take
out the garbage and...

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So much effort
goes into feeling well...Man,
I’m exhausted! There’s nausea
from supplements, the squeak
and throb, Just One More Rep!~ exercising…
Man, I’m exhausted! 
    ...

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Darling, I’m thinking of getting implants.
Right fine, I was going to the gardening centre today, we can go together
No, silly, breast implants.
You already have two...

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She never liked it here this her confession
I knew all along I had a connection
her husband passed away
and the very next day
A rental truck in...

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While attempting going to sleep after midnight...

December 27th, 2023,
the missus pounded mine posterior
(she played paddywhack 
on me blimey buttucks)
not only causing contusion, 
but flaying percussive...

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As a non-golfing husband I revel at tales
Of sunshine filled days chasing small balls,
Some in the rough others in sand,
All these brave girls fighting nature's...

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there was a young man from Seville
whose wife's voice was chillingly shrill
	he said please shut up
	he’d more than enough
sending him looking for advil!

(caveat: no endorsement...

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Please help yarn hexed door neighbor...

Yours truly pinned down by invisible 
vestiges of coronavirus and
getting attacked from angry plague 
of buttons, plus huge spools of...

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A peacock to some, 
but to others a confident and close friend.
Confidence, humorous, 
displays feathers, 
selects the perfect mate.

Unbeknownst is he of the 
defects 
within...

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The pink polka-dot nightgown,                     ...

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Hal is a catfisher.
He has had lots of dates this month.
He cannot believe how fast women are these days.
They practically tear your pants off.

He poses...

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The missus pounded mine posterior...
causing percussive rumpus 
to vibrate like jelly

Me experienced quite disruptive sleep
(quite early in the morning 
of November 10th 2022 -
no shut...

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