Handy Poems - Poems about Handy

Handy Randy

It’s nice to know a handyman 
To help when things go wrong,
Who fixes things around the house
And you don’t wait too long.

A pipe that drips, a door that sticks,
A light to be replaced
And any of a hundred other
Problems you have faced.

When someone with both time and tools
Can luckily be found,
Be grateful for his expertise
And hope

Too Handy

I need a helping hand                     Sorry, Mr Turpin, you won't be suitable.

Keep It Handy: Pg 13

There was a beautiful girl called Mandy 
Barman Andy loved mixing her Shandy 
He did strange cocktails 
Topped with frothy ales 
She blew off his foam, to sip the Brandy


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11/06/22

The Handy Heart

You have three hands; the third hand is the heart,
it squeezes and lets go, grabs and releases.

The heart that is a hand
pummels you from the inside when you fall in love,
it does not like to be ignored.

If you fall for another,
you had better let that hand in your heart
know that it’s the best of all

The Handy Work of God

The Handy Work of God
David J Walker

I call them my flowers

	as if
They were really mine
	
As if I really 
Owned the earth 

	as if I could
Make the sun shine

	as if  could 
call down the rain

	as if I could refrain
 the storms angry hailstones

	As if
I were anything more 
Than the gardener 

Admiring the handy work
	of God

A Lost Candy Is Handy

Now, you see your mislaid candy,
Still your very property and handy.

So, don’t words with your sister bandy 
Nor repeat that her hair is sandy: 
You might be saying she was The Thief,
Recklessly priming her for noisy grief;
For that’s what ‘Sandy’ supplies in brief
Whilst no daughter thief is fathered by a chief …

And-Alas!-you let candy your

Handy Andy

Handy Andy, fine figured and dandy
Asked his mother for a piece of candy
She gave him some gum
But she came undone
When he chomped it like their milk cow Mandy

Not Handy, Just Dandy

A man who isn't handy
  is not necessarily a dandy
If in trying times he's there
  What matter he can't fix a chair

Breakup Senrus Ii

More break-up Senryus
to quickly, subtly cut that
relationship cord:

You’re a guy, I’m
a girl... it turns out we’re
just too different!

Look, It’s not you – it’s 
me - turns out I don’t like
you much anymore.

Allegory time!
You're a turkey, ok? And 
I'm going on a diet.

You smile at him,
and then say: "You've helped
realize I'm gay."

Handy Andy

Andy's guided a train
  Flown a small plane
Steered the wheel of a ship
  Spurred a horse with a whip

Maneuvered a 64-foot truck
   Kayaked in a typhoon
Won a motorcycle race
   Landed perfectly on the moon

Then Andy went on a date
  Pop, Pop -- two flat tires
Said, 'I'm not much

Deep Thoughts Not By Jack Handy

I suppose it wouldn't be that bad to star in a cheesy tv show if the show was about cheese.

Careful what you order in the Korean noodle shop. It might arrive with mayonnaise on top.

Why are there no great InCel stand-up comics? And people say feminists aren't funny.

Ever heard of "Story Mapping"? Apparently it's a

Back For Renewals

Workman Abe always left his tools for you.
His hammer, his level, his wrench, his nails.

His electric drill, clamps, vice grips, screws too
Left them hither and yon, habit never fails.

From Timbuktu to Hackensack his stuff he lends. 
Some called him up to give him back his stuff.

Unconcerned, he said that’s okay; keep them my friends.
Workman Abe

From Snicker To Liquor

Rollo Rigby was a lover of candy
he kept a big supply ever handy.
But he became so obese
he waddled like geese.
He quit candy but is hooked on brandy
(making his life fine and dandy).

A Handy Dandy Family Thing I Did Not Know From Adam

A handy dandy family thing, I did not know from Adam

Monstrous disembodied giant hairy hand...
reached out thru Macbook Pro
Lenovo external screen
"no way can this be real,"
I muttered to no one in particular.

Bug eyed, slack jawed, yours truly froze
petrified as an insidious wrist took rat -
manifested arm - matured
into huge fingered palm meadowed beast,

reached out thru

A Craftsman Named Handy--

There was a craftsman named Handy
Who used to a craftsman dandy
everyday day he'd make
a craved wooden stakes
and boxes shaped like hearts to hold candies


7/11/19
Written words by James Edward Lee Sr. 2019©

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