Hallie the Halloween cat had an evil look
Her eyes were amber, she was never shook
The stare she gave people made them shiver and shrink
I was terrified of her myself, as are the frig and the sink
I did not know appliances feared anything, someone said.
Are you kidding? One stare from that cat and they might be dead.
She has already put the dishwasher and garbage disposal on the brink.
Here Hallie comes again! Screamed the kitchen sink.
Twenty-five years
since we agreed to this and still,
I vow to be there,
just outside your line of sight,
as you confidently mispronounce quinoa,
as you decide, again, that the best way
to check if the pan is hot
is to touch it.
I vow to say nothing
as you eyeball the rice-to-water ratio,
as you insist the foundation holds weight,
as you press snooze believing
time is different for you.
I vow to remain clogged-drain quiet
as you tell the plumber,
No, I got it.
As you grab the Tupperware
stamped Do Not Microwave.
I vow to never stop you,
never correct you,
never intervene—
just smile softly,
like god’s understudy
only to exist,
always,
just beyond your reach,
a presence, a history, a silent witness
to your worst ideas,
like a Liberty half-dollar trapped in a garbage disposal,
like a key locking the door from the outside.
Oh, what a hideous subject to cross my path,
Addition, subtraction, division, multiplication,
Percentages and fractions, those I can grasp,
But the rest, oh, I wish to throw you in the pit,
I can’t see your point of view no matter what you do.
To me, you're the dragon that bites off my head,
A vicious lion, while I’m the innocent bunny that is caught in your claws.
You're the shark, and I am the fish you are gobbling up,
So don’t pretend that you're a friend to me.
I truly dislike you,
When you appear on my screen.
I imagine a million ways to get rid of you,
I'd toss you in a garbage disposal,
Watch you grind up into a million different pieces.
I'd throw you into the deepest part of the ocean's,
I wouldn’t be sad as I watch you sink.
Oh, if only I could launch you into space,
So fast that NASA would think you’re a UFO.
I wouldn’t regret your departure,
So far that you crash-land on Jupiter's third moon.
But in the end, it’s all just fantasy,
For it’s clear you’ll most likely be the death of me,
Before my school years are through.
If I was a gnat I know whom I would bother
I would hide in their garbage disposal
flying up into their face when they ran water in their sink
I would hit them in the mouth, disgusting them
when I tired of being a gnat I would become a mosquito
buzzing in the ears of my enemies, biting them with gnarly teeth
in my smallness, I would finally get the revenge I seek
Jahore Pakistani kind of terrorist driving a Tahoe shooting into my home attempting to impersonate me gain royalties from my American poetry sorry my ancestors served Wwll Vietnam Korean Afghanistan Iraq for these reasons I will never ever fear scum like you carrying a rubber badge you obtained from Gargano strip club on fletcher ave.in Tampa bay don’t forget who you are you are actually times 30 Gargano ran a garbage disposal strip club of females just like you only you become obsessed with my identity freak of nature back off sorry you got caught in bed with my abusive ex husband this gave you false hope that you could audition to become me after death Ha ha ha ha truly funny twisted and sick ha ha ha ha stop breaking in my home for underwear that won’t make you me dear ha ha ha ha you are very twisted ewwww thank you god for exposing this imposter jay Townsend Johnson Henry Tampainian clone.
I am American
The major problem in the world today
Is dealing with world garbage disposal
Tomorrow will be much too late
Humans when faced with a life changing event
Man is usually affected
We mostly respond in a positive manner
Let's hope tomorrow will have a similar outcome
I hear a cry from the kitchen:
“Who did it? Who’s the perp?
Who dumped down this slime and sludge?
The garbage disposal went burp!”
Contest Name: Your Best Quatrain
Sponsor: L. Milton Hankins
the garbage disposal
a smoothy for the sewer to swallow the brew
but are you ever coming back to the barn
for nestling to feed from a beak full of gnats
can we share a world you and me and share the seasons
the colibri looking for nectar I invite to slurp sugar
as the bumblebee is looking for colors and me for a pay check.
THE DARK LINE
when I woke there was a tiny rim of darkness
right around the rising sun
a warning that my feet
should not touch the floor today.
but if I told my boss
I dare not leave my bed
he'd call me a fool
another greedy soul
will put his name upon my desk
but if he did
perhaps the dark line would follow him today.
his children would lose their shoes
his taxi would not arrive on time
his wife would file for divorce
his garbage disposal would eat a spoon
his pants would tear as he sat in a conference
I peeked under the curtains just before the alarm declared true morning
the dark ring had disappeared behind the glow of the sun.
the miseries were non transferable--
and much better than yesterday.
V. Anderson-Throop 2/2104
The couch invisible,
hidden by a body of mass
His gut rises
His gigantic thighs
His round ankles
His flappy breasts
His chin rests on
a pillow of fat that
jiggles
He devours his heavy meals
conducting noises like
a garbage disposal
His ass anchors
the motionless weight
It sweats and sweats
His wife placing another bottle
of Coca Cola
(A straw is used)
so his neck dodges stress of bending
His weight is probably
due to a disease
Everyone has a disease
these days
Driving to their doctors
pleading for their prescription
then driving to the pharmacy
to gladly pick it up
Clinging to their pill case
As the fat man
slurps down more pizza
All of them proud
to be an American
He likes an egg
without a shell, cracked
by the careless act
of a grocery store clerk.
There's always some jerk
who could make you sick
then read your obit
with a pained expression
as if that session
and consequence grim
had nothing to do
with him.
The Og. loves
spaghetti
is always ready
when you've got
a question
of indigestion.
He loves a meal
of apple peel
(forgive me Giuseppi
of the Pinnochio
story). I do not care
for apple peel,
and though the Og.
is small, he
gobbles it all.
town by the tracks
train goes through
day and night
a passenger train station
making the town flourish
money made from the station
brings tourists
easier to get to and from the city
and then it truly is up to you
where you want to live
Town by the tracks
building a trainstation
so the town can make money
to make the town safe
purifying the water
and garbage disposal
and centres for the kids
a train could change ill fortune
more economical
less gas used
never a necesity to drive through thick fog
you can't see through
Looking for the formal definition, structure, and history of this poetry form? Visit the Poetry Dictionary entry below. Then return to explore how PoetrySoup members bring the form to life through their own poems.