poor choice
snack shame
junk food
guilt glitter
bean dip
lazy lava
nachos
cheesy
cheese chaos
melt mess
Cheetos
cheese demons
cheesy popcorn
crunch riot
Fritos
crunchy
crunchy
shrapnel
tooth doom
broke tooth
tooth pain
dentist
dentist
visit
snacking
failure
Falling in love
is really quite simple–
The girl ahead of me
in line today
ordered a small pitcher
of beer and one single
bag of fritos.
2 cups of crushed pork rinds ( hot and spicy) or crushed fritos
1 tablespoon of Garlic powder
2 tablespoons of cayeene
1 tablespoon of onion power
1 tablespoon of salt
2 tablespoons of cornstarch
2 cups of flour
In a plastic bag, shake until evenly mixed.
Set aside.
1/4 cup of buttermilk
3/4 cup of milk
3 eggs
Mix with a whisk, set aside.
5 chicken breast filleted
Moistened with 2 tablespoons of buttermilk
Dip into flour and coat, dip into eggwash, and back into flour, fry in hot olive oil or cornoil.
10 bacon strips
5 lettuce leaves
10 slices of tomatoes
Mayo
5 submarine rolls
1 cup of crush spicy pork rinds
1/2 diced salami
1 teaspoon of minced garlic
5 tablespoons of cream cheese
5 tablespoons of chopped chives
1 cup of softened goat cheese
Hollow some plum
tomatoes and fill with cream mixture.
Mix 1/4 cup of olive oil and 1/4 of lemon juice
Drizzle the tops.
Juillene some potatoes blanch for 15 minutes in salt water. Cool the and fry crisp in oil.
Settlement
If I take off my shoes
And I sell my toes
Does that make my toes, Fritos
If I close my eyes at night
am I legally blind, lost my sight
All I know is yes and no
and that air is light and darkness
the electrician fixed the wall switch
I put my mitten on my feet
I place my feet above my head
Now this is the time even corpse wish they were dead
Settlement
10/09/17
written by James Edward Lee Sr.
i was just a kid the first time i met him
he borrowed my brand new wrist-rocket
and scampered off into the night, laughing like a ghoul
the sound of two young lovers on a beach, punctuated by howls of pain
the returning of footfalls and mad laughter
he had his fun, now it was time to party
i had no way of knowing this crazy man was to be in my life for many years to come
i had no way of knowing he would help shape who i was to become
he drug us from the beaches of Oregon to the deltas and forests of California
forever altering the path i strode upon
once, he had me and his son dig a 6X6 pit and bury him up to his neck
pre-emptive of him "Nutting up".
we fed him beer and fritos at his request... we unburied him after he came down
There are stories to be told that i cannot tell here.... but alive and fertile in my memories.
one day i will see him again and ask permission to tell some....
But it won't matter..... you wouldn't believe them anyway!!!!!
Super Bowl Sunday is finally here
same excitement as Staubach and Griese
drinkers have an excuse to drink more beer
today’s Super Bowl not sure if I’ll see
the Super Bowl is much more than a game
those commercials bring excitement also
Fritos and Pepsi will also get fame
for many the game is the only show
I’ve have been to two Super Bowl parties
last one was the Chargers and the Niners
I worked those Mondays without a tardy
I’m not granddad I’m not with those miners
so eat drink and enjoy the game today
once the work week starts there is no more play
More Zany Warnings
By Elton Camp
On the metal barrel of a rifle, not to be debated:
“Misuse may cause injury or death,” tis stated
On wrapper of a Fruit Roll-Up snack we see:
“Remove plastic before eating.” My, oh me!
Warning found on a remote control for a TV:
“Not dishwasher safe” are the words we see
“Safe for use around pets” is assurance told
On box of cat litter that we have been sold
Fritos bag says, “No purchase necessary to win”
And then it explains that the details are within
“Cleans and refreshes without water or soap,”
Contains water and soap says the same dope
Instructions on muffin package can’t be beat:
“Remove wrapper, open mouth, insert and eat”
Then this taken from a Swann frozen dinner:
“Serving suggestion: Defrost” is sure a winner
On a Domino’s sandwich box this we are bid:
“For heat-retaining to function, close the lid”
My name is Charlie Munford
I am all Redneck, not a nerd
I have the gas sucking truck, big bald muddin' tires
I needed some money, so I sat my truck on fire
If you come over empty handed, no beer or snacks
Prepare for an old fashioned butt whippin' or you better make some tracks
Poor mannered guests make me mean
I am a legend in the Redneck community, they call me Niller Bean
I sleep among the empty beer cans and potato chip bags
I fall asleep staring at my Rebel flag
When I go grocery shopping, it is scratch and dent all the way
The discount food game I know how to play
I grab a bag of Fritos and crush them, then use a black marker and write crushed
on the outside
Every week I take the grocery store on my discount ride
I do these tactics where I can't be seen
I sign my credit card receipt as Niller Bean
People call me crazy, I am just misunderstood
If you get to know me, you will see, my intentions are good
Now I am Jammin' to some Patsy Cline
Women call me a pig, I prefer the term swine
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