Flabby Poems | Examples

Water Margins

Dawn, a bed comes ashore,
dripping and fog laden.

Tuna sandwiches float
on foaming waves of nausea,
aqueous globs of salty oils,
surface.  Punctured sea-dreams
float; flabby and flatulent.

The day paddles around aimlessly,
tides, rather than wait,
slosh about spongy ankles.

A rubber flipper mislaid
off the Normandy coast,
slipstreams through time,
one lost sand-encrusted flip-flop
bobs on by.

May have to snorkel longer
if there is any hope of seeing
the sun sink.

Eventually aquatic ghosts
depart for a younger past.

Back on the swaying deck
of a queasy reality
a fresh wind dries sheets.

Footprints in the sand
are spied through a fisheye lens.
A shipwrecked yesterday
is waving,
glad to be finally rescued.

my sneaky boobs

My boobs are sneaky
inching themselves toward the floor
they were once firm and perky
now they are flabby giant jello blobs
stretching toward ground zero
whether I am looking or not
do I care?
worse.
Not only do I not care
I am no longer amused by them

Rattle

In light industrial units, sheet-metal roofs
ping under the rising heat of the sun.
Sounds of tin stretched into rhythm.
He tumbles out of a fuzzy dream
tramples over himself, sucks in
half-digested thoughts.
Morning on the edge
of a medium-sized mid-west city,
Mourning doves throttle a coo or two.
This late chiming morn,
he shares a first-rate breakfast tea
with the chug and chur
of a de-frosting fridge
wallows awhile in flabby abstractions.
Minor keys ding aluminum sidings,
gradually low-grade whispers
stutter into words, a kind of poem
he can almost hear.

why do you date him

Jake was flabby flaccid and wimpy overall
He is not handsome, truthful, honorable or tall
Why do you date him asked her son Call
Because he taught you how to play baseball
Remembering this, he tried to like him after all

The Command

The command is to write -
but every day you wake up
saying to yourself:

"I can't write, I was never taught,
my fingers are illiterate appendages
of a cheap Japanese laptop,
my mind is too oddly shaped
it has no dustcover
its pages have wormholes
holes that smaller worms fall through."

Every day the same old thing,

and a plasma screen mocks you,
mocks your open slack mouth,
your dull eyes,
the slow grinding inertia of every thought.

The command is insistent,
it prods the soft belly of your cringing ego,
demands a pound of flabby words
be made flesh,

and so, you tap random keys listlessly
until another string of consciousness
unwinds itself
into a last line,
that if not memorable,
yet at least will not live long enough
to disgrace you.

Menu of My Eating Pets Poems

Menu of Eating Pets Poems

naughty always knew
Trump mira lago menu
he will continue
 
cat creole soup
chewy cat clam chowder
flabby tabby patty
oodles of poodles with noodles
collie named Molly hit by trolley
always love lean lab
cat dying in mortal combat
putrid pit bull pot pie
candied cuddly kitten cutlets
BBQ 'ed Burned Beagle on bagel 
Remaining Raked over roadkill

about pet eating
from my list am deleting
Trump have been beating

Trump have pets deported
out from us Trump escorted
people Trump shorted

Lexical Abuse

The English language slapped me down.
I stabbed it thrice in its flabby gut.
I threw it in a pond to drown.
I asked myself as I made each cut, 
“Is this lexical abuse?”

Work Em

Push 'em, pull 'em, dip 'em, and squat'em.
Whatever you do, just don't neglect 'em

Aptly say no to loose and flabby
And yes, to tight 'cause loose is too shabby

No gym membership, Bowflex, or Peloton?
No worries 'cause pushing, pulling, dipping and squatting
will never be outdone

The mission is to push, pull, dip, and drop
So look good, feel good, and once you start, you're not gonna wanna stop

Walk it out too and allow the arms to buoyantly swing
A nice heel-to-toe flow; now listen to the heart sing

So push 'em, pull 'em, dip 'em, and squat'em.
But whatever you do, just make sure you never forget 'em

After the Game

Super bowl Sunday
ended yesterday
I was sure my diet had won

I did not prevail
when I saw the scale
and it read my old weight plus one

So now that football
won’t be back ‘til fall
I will get back to it again

No more tasty sweets
cookies, pies or treats
and this time I’m going to win

Going to work out
that’s what it’s about
making my flabby muscles strong

I look at the road
and see it has snowed
so starting today might be wrong

Attawitches

Wiccans do ride,
Our full moon tide,
Happy Halloween,
Magic is our scene,
Potions and charms,
Despite flabby arms,
Big girl britches,
Brooms aloft, attawitches!

Y'All Make Me Laugh So

Y'all make me laugh so
        hard...
silly it's as I've never laughed before

        then when...

you scribe your foolishness
  oh how my tummy akees
        my side...
my giggle will wiggle my
        flabby...
I'll wait-up all night
        for...
     you to call,
then you write me ~ I'll get...

Gibalie-goobbly-blop
Bibil-ly-boobsal-ly-goope
Jibery-momsal-ly-gue,
as if you were Mr. Magoo
       so, swell no regreat...
every time you contact me
 it all starts, just to hear your voice...
       again whoopee!
my giggles just can't stop,
out loud; Y'all make me laugh so!

Flabby But Fit

I'm flabby but fit
    At a bar I sit
  I play my guitar
    then squeeze into my car

  I'm dumb but I'm smart
    I buy modern art
  then I load up my cart
    to sell at flea mart

  I'm happy but sad
    'cos 2 + 2 I can't add
  Thought I'd reached nadir
    Pop bought me calculator

  I'm old but I'm young
    Come see my tongue
  Taste buds still sprout ~ 
    That's why my tummy sticks out

If Romeo and Juliet Had Survived

I was warned about you lazy Montagues
Some Romeo you turned out to be!
You’re so flabby you can’t see your own shoes
Where for art thou?  Watching sports on TV!

Enough, Juliet, you’ve turned into your mother
With your nagging, complaining, and ceaseless spending
All you Capulet women just hover and smother
How I yearn for Shakespeare’s grand ending!
10/13/22

Middle-aged crisis is one topic which William Shakespeare stayed away from.

Tabby Cat Footles

Cat Needs a Workout

Flabby 
Tabby

Chat Cat

Gabby
Tabby

Grumpy Cat’s Relative

Crabby
Tabby

Cat with 9 Violent Lives

Scabby
Tabby

Cat with Raggedy Coat

Shabby
Tabby

Cat of the Convent

Abbey 
Tabby

July 13, 2022

Contrarian Veterinarian

In Encino there's a veterinarian
who is the Valleys rudest contrarian
He'll insult a shy tabby
Greet a pug: Hey there, flabby!
But at home, he's a kind Presbyterian
                    5/17/22

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