Best Flabby Poems
Colorful flowers and spaghetti straps
And my flabby arms from seams overlap
But the sundress still beckons
It’s diet time, I reckon
Girdle needed, my tummy to entrap
Seeking new ways for calories to burn
To wear that sundress, I’ll let famine churn
Want to look provocative
Avoid stares accusative
Hunger overwhelms, for ice cream I yearn
Sign up for Biggest Loser on TV
So Jillian Michaels can torture me
Pushing boulders up steep hills
To accentuate the frills
Of a small sundress designed for Twiggy
Jillian cracks the whip with no remorse
I drag tired bones through the exercise course
Now slim, I sleep peacefully
Blessed with deep serenity
While friends say, “She makes a beautiful corpse.”
*Entry for “The Sundress,” a contest sponsored by Constance La France ~A
Rambling Poet~
by Carolyn Devonshire
Categories:
flabby, funny
Form:
Limerick
The Serial Detective
I turned the last page,
It is time to say “goodbye.”
We embraced most of many days,
My tears are salty, though your eyes are dry.
I’ll miss your tummy, the touch of your hand,
Your flabby cheek, the moon, the band.
The way you made notes in your tiny book,
The way you put together the facts while I cooked.
You could solve a case with a burnt cigar,
And go on to another killing not far
You’re fearsome, yet lovesome, yet have a good head,
How many books have you written in my bed
Categories:
flabby, books, fantasy,
Form:
Rhyme
A small desire like a spark, I do not know lit from where,
Frenzy of becoming an orator in me did flair;
I watched often, like blackbirds, seldom shutting my eye-lids,
Each speech of great orators, staying solid like lipids...!
It's time to perform - said well-wishers, relatives and friends,
Good-time was what all waited for anxieties to cleanse;
I was then a little boy just reaching adolescence,
Emotions and feelings had invaded my common-sense...!
There came, as though the final judgment, the appointed day,
I was ready, on our school stage, to perform my best way;
All applauded, as I entered the stage very happy,
Why this tremor? Why blankness of mind? Why heart goes flabby...?
Many laughed, howled and hooted; my kith and kin stood perplexed;
I left the dais, like a lunatic, humbled and vexed;
Pain of shame, like bark scorpion, my internals did sting,
Despair and frustration within, like eagles, did spread wing...!
I went dumbstruck and plunged into a cave of silence,
Knowing, my people left me to my inner violence;
That I come out, like a lion, courageous and robust,
Excel in performance, full of self-confidence and trust...!
What clicked, then, exactly, I still verily do not know,
Was it the resolve within that like flood of lava, flow?
My oration out-poured like a cloudburst, thunderously,
In this art, now, I shine like Sirius star, wondrously...!
31 May 2022
The Greatest Performance of My Life Poetry Contest
Sponsored by: JCB Brul
Categories:
flabby, confidence, courage, trust,
Form:
Rhyme
Cat Needs a Workout
Flabby
Tabby
Chat Cat
Gabby
Tabby
Grumpy Cat’s Relative
Crabby
Tabby
Cat with 9 Violent Lives
Scabby
Tabby
Cat with Raggedy Coat
Shabby
Tabby
Cat of the Convent
Abbey
Tabby
July 13, 2022
Categories:
flabby, cat,
Form:
Footle
Written: February 25, 2024
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A sun sets in the west; oh, boy, he has gone to rest,
Mama grips her breast in an apocalyptic pain quest.
Each diaphanous creature feeds on crimson land,
Grass on city streets—an effusive sight as we stand.
After the juice ran out, the town turned silent,
Silence, a somber speech—no swoon is violent.
Yet, something has splashed up on the beach,
A man who is still alive but too flabby to reach.
After millennia, a desultory one can fathom,
The chimera, an epiphany of root phantom.
Humanity perished—ephemeral rapt by the void,
Lambent nature likes a vacuum, such a devoid.
Earth purged, and no desuetude of amort era,
Ideal and dwarf beings graze on reddish terra.
Lawns on sidewalks are an emollient reminder,
A vibrant town, now conflate on a flow grinder.
Washed up ashore, just a transient figure,
In a post-man scene—an evanescent creature.
His arrival bestows a nostalgic gaze on the past,
A calyx relic from a world that couldn't last.
The town remains quiet—a haunting hush,
As nature reclaims what was once lush.
But a man on shore is a relic of our fate,
A transient being left to contemplate.
In a post-man script, beshrew a world once alive,
But now, it's just a memory, a fading strive.
The man on the beach, a symbol of our demise,
He gazes at the sky with weary eyes.
Apocalyptic distress engulfs us all,
As we witness the closing, the final fall.
But amidst the chaos, a sparkle of hope,
In the transient nature of humanity's scope.
Grass that grows on city streets is a resilient sign,
Cynosure nature prevails, even in mankind's decline.
Cities may be quiet, but echoes of our past remain,
Whispers of the wind and the rhythm of the rain.
Categories:
flabby, analogy, appreciation, celebrity, song,
Form:
Rhyme
Gee, how we blame our culture for starting this!
Oh, how ignorant can we be!
We blame men as evil and macho?
Yet we drooled when younger over Ralph. Macchio.
Ask any woman who gets up at three!
How great it is to get out there and earn a salary?
Then not only commute but slave all day.
Pick up the kids at three, and then the kids
overburdened with hours of homework?
Mom has to help them like a enslaved Turk!
Then each night prepare dinner for all three?
While clothes in the washing machine be?
Women's Liberation~~
My, my .....oh me!
I have not listed endless shopping or sports
on this list!
Gloria Steinheim's neck and women's lib needs
a quick twist.
Women brainwashed to theif very core.
Now think its an honor to wear
pants, which I abhor.
We are far to flabby in buttocks and thighs.
Walking, our legs look like an
earthquake, Richter Scale 5~jello surprise!
Perms begone, no more pretty hair, we must look
like men?
What's comes next?
Smoking cigars in tweed jackets in the den?
Sorry to rant, but I miss women
having time,looking fine...
To run a home, not looking for
a shoeshine.
I will write later of the history of
a woman's place being in the home.
And it's close to the time of Ancient Rome.
October 11, 2019
Categories:
flabby, america, family, home, humorous,
Form:
Rhyme
Ripples
Down the dusty road,
in tattered rags,
He came,
weary,
wilted,
and
withered.
Body bent with age,
bones sticking out of the flabby skin,
with a tremor
running down his limbs.
With eyes reflecting hope,
he waited at my doorstep.
No words came out from pursed lips
but,
in mute language
begged for alms,
hopeful he would never be betrayed
I held his shriveled hand,
helped him ascend the steps.
Like a child obeying it’s Elder,
he sat on a chair in the patio.
The sumptuous fare, served before,
he surveyed with eyes
bulging out in utter disbelief,
and greedily devoured
every bit of morsel.
A rare gleam lighted up his face.
With hands folded in benison
he stood up and silently took leave.
I watched him stumble
along the country track
and fade away in the distance.
Ripples of joy stirred my mind
in ever widening circles
as, a pebble idly tossed
causes ripples in still waters
over a random act of kindness
idly tossed !
Kindness
Down the dusty road, in tattered rags he came-
An old man- weary, wilted, and withered.
Supported on a stick, still he staggered lame,
And with age and fatigue, his body quivered.
I could see a tremor running down his hips.
With expectant eyes, he waited at my doorstep.
No words came out of his pursed lips.
He was tottering as he took each step.
I held his hand, helped him to the patio.
Like a child obeying its elder, he sat on a chair
With eyes sending out a radiant glow,
From the sumptuous fare served, he ate his share.
As he finished his meal, a gleam lighted up his face.
He stood up with hands folded in benison
And took leave, bowing and smiling in grace.
I was so happy that I could make his world blazon.
I watched him stumble along the uneven track
And fade away like a shadow in the distance.
So elated I was that the tears of joy I couldn’t hold back,
With an ebullience penetrating my mind’s outer surface.
As a pebble idly tossed cause ripples in still water,
A random act of kindness idly tossed gave me such delight.
As the ripples keep widening and on the banks splatter,
In me, the joy over my kind act, as waves began to beat.
Categories:
flabby, happy, how i feel,
Form:
Free verse
Best for last
Lizard lips
Blizzard tips
Cow pies
Cannon fodder
Tobacco breath
Primitive Quest
Papilloma’s daughter
Whale droppings
Frantic knocking
Eutectic solder
**** eyes
Flabby thighs
Don’t bother
Petal pink
Purple ink
Sugar water
Melon slice
Sticky rice
Bubbly juice
Fruit tree
Pretty feet
Bustin loose
Air guitar
Morning star
Spruce goose
Genius type
No hype
Sweet night
Categories:
flabby, allusion, humorous, wisdom,
Form:
List
Oh, finely feathered fellow
with plumage of green and yellow,
your Houdini-esque abilities
and astounding circus-like agilities
make my flabby jowls drop with surprise
at how easily your hooked beak can prise
any dwarf-sized opening in your cage,
to open so easily, under your gauge.
Your stuffed, fat, feathered body can
fit through anything. Yes, I'm a fan.
Your squeaky, squawky, shrill talking
lets me know my efforts you're mocking
as I try to burglar proof your cage
as you shriek at me in indignant rage.
You really should hope that I succeed
because if I don't, the cat you'll feed.
04/04/2013
~~~ for Suzanne's Synathroesmic Cat contest ~~~
Categories:
flabby, humorous, pets, cat, me,
Form:
Couplet
Do we read newspapers
Or ignore the world?
Do we vote
Or do we complain?
Do we ask questions of elected officials
Or are we complacent?
Do we right a wrong
Or remain silent?
Do we stay
Or do we go?
Do we sing
Or do we dance?
Do we run or
Do we walk?
Do we study
Or do we wing it?
Do we listen or
Do we yell?
Are our stomachs firm or flabby?
Are we smart
Or are we stupid?
Do we even care?
Categories:
flabby, life,
Form:
Narrative
My thighs may slap together
My bum, it may be huge
But if you look a little deeper
You'll find my heart is true
My stomach may be rounded
My bingo wings? Disaster
But my friends will always stick around
While yours will leave much faster
Everything may wobble
On my walk across to work
But the smiles I get are genuine
While yours are just a smirk
I may have got a second chin
And be all over flabby
But you get your joy from others pain
While my friends make me happy
So while your comments hurt me
And make me sad and worry
I can't wallow in self pity
As it's for you that I feel sorry
Categories:
flabby, friendship, health, may, me,
Form:
Chastushka
Written January 17, 2011
Sit down in an empty room
No one makes a sound
Unless I ring the alarm and sound all the sirens
The angel of darkness swoons to reel in its catch
If he leads, then I'll follow suit
Preacher preach to me now, while I'm being lifted off of the ground
Rhetoric can't raise the dead
So pull me back before he reels me in with steady hands and fills my mind with lead
I'll leave my best regards to all of those who tried to snap his line in attempts to reel me back
But friends are only friends
You can throw me in an ambulance but as soon as you close the doors
I'll be gone into the weight of my regrets
Following the angel of death into the darkest depths
Until I see the light of all that's left
But at what point do I cross the line in the sand?
How do I know that this could just be the roll of the tide whispering in my ear?
Oh how it digs into my mind
Torn between which side of brightness I will find
Split between the bony hand of disconnect and the flabby flesh of past regret
There I remain waiting for a miracle, looking for a sign
Or am I too far for miracles, am I too blind for signs?
Oh have I let the artist down?
Categories:
flabby, dark, death, depression, emotions,
Form:
Lyric
I whispered lightly as a rose
To grease my oily bagpipe,
And sniffing with her hairy nose
A dwarf flew into sight.
‘Pull down your flabby chopsticks, man.’
She ordered like a waiter,
And lowering my name to Stan
Got on all fours to cater.
‘I am Dame Doris Chucklebum.’
She laughed but half an inch.
‘I like things that are rarely done.’
Then stroked me with a pinch.
‘Take back thy sweaty chollocks, love.’
I pleaded like a pro,
And with a hefty boxing glove
Took on the lady so.
It lasted less than half a tick,
Less if you counted slow.
And with a little knowing trick
Fled fleeing on the go.
‘Come back! Don’t go!’ she wept with ploy,
‘I’ll change like Whitney Whopper.’
Enjoying but a little joy
And playing with her chopper.
Categories:
flabby, funny, hilarious, humor, humorous,
Form:
Lyric
Oh where does the dragonfly go, between the reeds,
And murky shore.
Gently dipping his wings edges, in the waters cooling
Ripples, dancing across the tingling ponds waves,
To moisten it's beautiful translucent appendages,
So sheer and delicate of design.
Danger's bullfrog, on the Lilly pads so sits still,
Waiting ever so patiently, for the dragonfly to slip.
Yet awareness’s great aerial acrobat, knows better
Not to mess around with this amphibian's slick
Devilish tongue.
So flights fancy leads him beyond, the flabby
Froggies reach.
Testing limitations boundaries, this lighter
Than air insect, soars at mercy's whim,
Gliding the currents wind, and tasting freedom's
Glory of wonderment.
Inspiration's tiniest of miracles, melts the poetic
Heart within, humbling one to pause, at nature's
Beauty beyond words expression.
Gleaming beneath the summers sun, the light
Shines and shimmers, as if made of glass,
A reflective surface of diamonds, cast asunder
With hews deepest blues, as it's aquatic canvas
Background below.
In this spiritual garden of the wetlands, cannot
Thee taste the essence of true purity, amongst
Clarity’s crystal clear air.
Oh do I not envy such a creature, as this the
Dragonfly, to drift a aloft from reed, to the
Abandoned Lillie pad, and see such magnificent
Natural beauty within nature itself.
BY: CHERYL ANNA DUNN
Categories:
flabby, beauty, imagery, imagination, inspiration,
Form:
Free verse
My Christmas Box by Rob Barratt
We’ll have an X-Men, X-files, X-Box, no socks, X-Factor, Max Factor, Max Bygraves, no war
graves of a Christmas
I want empathy, an MP3, a hemp-free, hump-free, grump-free, Humperdink, have-a drink
of a Christmas
An Oh Come All Ye Faithful, Oh strictly come dancing, come-on come-on, curmudgeonly
comfy chair of a Christmas
A Doctor Do-Little, Doctor Who, PS2, Snoop Dog, poop scoop, Scooby Doo, *doo-bi-doo-bi-
doo, bi-doo-bi-doo-bi, …doo-bi-doo-bi-doo, bi-doo-bi-doo-bi …. of a Christmas
*(sing this bit to “Strangers in the Night” by Frank Sinatra)
A God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen, eat, drink and be very, very, very merry, Neneh Cherry,
cherubim, seraphim, Cherry B, Babycham, Babyshambles, Baby Jesus of a Christmas
An Electric Ladyland, electronic toy, Toy Story, Tolstoy, toyboy, ladyboy, ladyshave,
Ladybird, Ladysmith Black Mambazo of a Christmas
We’ll have a Kung Fu Panda pandemic, planned pandemonium, potted plants, Pirates of
Penzance, pants of a Christmas
A no God, I-pod, I want, I got, what a lot, why not, chestnut-hot, gut rot of a Christmas
We’ll have a Band Aid, slow fade, old Slade, teasmaid, Lucozade, “Look at my presents!” of a
Christmas
I want a no-Mugabe, Punjabi, kohlrabi, Westminster Abbey, get flabby, kimosabe, Abu
Dhabi, yabba-dabba-doo, fandabidozi, Beaky, Mick and Tich ……of a Christmas
I don’t believe angels exist
‘Cos I’m a bit of an atheist
But I hope you all have………….
An archangel Gabriel, Hark the Herald Angels Sing, wing-ding, wild thing, Angel Delight, no
fights, fairy lights, angel cake, William Blake, Angel Clare, love everywhere, angels above,
peace and love, peace and love, peace and love….. of a Christmas
Merry Christmas!
Categories:
flabby, funnypeace, angel, angel, drink,
Form:
Light Verse