Ern Poems | Examples


Premium Member Communion wine drinker me'

Last month I prayed for rain in California..So the
Flames would die.  And people could survive.' Now
I'm giving thanks in feb-ru-ary.. That our Lords still
The same in this.. Twenty twenty five.!
i asked the One, behind the clouds.!
For His mer-cy. and He answered. Faster than  an ex-press
Train.'  Now if they ask me? who was that foo-l in the cor-ner?
Praying out? I'll say
' com-mun-ion..Wine drinker me ' Yeah
 com-munion wine drinker; oh me.!
A branch of the 'true vine' of et-ern-ity..!

BYE ERN

BYE ERN

There once was a man from Bavaria
Whose actions could not be scarier
In the woods where he lurked
And at night where he worked
It was designated as a no-go area

But at heart he was a secretive guy 
Of ill repute, but couldn’t see why
All those songs that were sung
About him being well hung
From a tree in the woods so high


Premium Member My Wife Ernestine

My Wife Ernestine
12/21/1944
Miracle Man
12/1/2023

Today is “Ern’s” day
December the twenty First
Happy Birthday Ern

Premium Member Miss Josie

“Miss Josie”
Miracle Man
2/25/2022 

Our neighbor Josie don’t like the snow,
she comes to visit and then won’t go.
Josie always eats three squares a day,
she seems to think that we’re her Cafe.

Sometimes she decides to stay at night,
bringing to my wife great delight.
Josie has become somewhat heavy with age, 
so Ern always gives Miss Josie the stage.

In her younger days she was a real dish,
but to see less of her is my every day wish.
Josie had three children and wanted more,
but for health reasons that wasn’t in store.

Always well groomed, without shoes on her feet,
Josie is a cat that belongs up the street.
When first she came my wife was smitten,
a skinny little thing no more than a kitten.

Premium Member Uncle Albert

He was always known to everyone as Uncle Albert,
He used to sign all my birthday cards as Uncle Albert,
He used to turn around when I shouted Uncle Albert,
He was who we visited when we went to see Uncle Albert.

But I'm sorry to say, he's now belated,
Sadly passed away, dead and cremated.

And what I can't understand,
And what I am eager to learn,
Is why has everyone stopped calling him Uncle Albert,
And started calling him Uncle Ern?


Premium Member Whitey Was

Whitey Was
By: Tom
1/15/2021

O-utstanding
U-nfettered
R-escued

C-aptivating
A-ffectionate
T-eachable

L-ively
I-dolized
T-rustworthy
T-ops
L-issome
E-nergetic

W-hite
H-andsome
I-ntelligent
T-rue blue
E-xceptional
Y-oung at heart

B-eloved
O-ver
Y-ern

Ipnotico Suggestions


Crocodile voices whisper
in the loneliness of your serotonin void
Calling out from the dark deep,
they 
        speak 
                   seductively ... 
urging you to come closer 
	to the edge,
and step off into the murkiness — 
Dark Shadow depths of moral ambiguity

Attic warm, wooly fond memories 
clothe the coldness
of your heavy cynical chest
Those emotional cumbersome, faded picture frames
only tell half the story

As you sink into the Darth abyss,
		to greet the devouring Vader words 
which temptingly suggest — 
That you can have the whole
of whatever it was you lost   ...   and so much more

A glut of pleasurable sinsations
          velvet touch drown 
your chaste, austere inhibitions 
The drip      drip      drip   of temporal torture,
fills your cracked     ern thoughts
                              st
                           ci
with vain epidermal things ... 
Naked desires, which heretofore 
were foreign to you

Ipnotico suggestions,
of coral reef carnal beauty,
lures you into the deep  deep sleep ...

where awakened Leviathan jaws
are opening

Premium Member The Teach's From Brookl'N / Dedicated Ta Sweetheart

T hey’d aughta not called nookie
H eaven’s blessed cookie...
E ither burd or bee, cause neither's a lookie! 

B urds well der feathered, not like me?
I n da interest of clarity, I’m certainly NO bee?
R obins do have red breasts and I have two, see?
D ern, maybe dat's why dey calls dem da burds and da bees?
S o, if da ladies da burd, da guy must be da bee? 

A nyway, why didn’t dey call IT da cows and da doves?
N ow, cows at least got legs and doves are for luv!
D rat, I still don’t get da bee stingy thingie, "Gov?"

T he bees has a sting YIKE and bees sure love honey.
H ell, maybe they thought a man'd sting ya for money?
E ither dat or “Hmmm,” some ladies are real punny?

B et we women smell real sweet, I guess, and da bees fly to honey?
E eeeeeekkk, I so confuddled, I feel like Mikey Rooney? 
E ach dern metaphors is making me more looney tooney!
S imply forget da dern foolishness and give me a groomie!

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