What‘s better than a biscuit?
Hard to debunk
Treasure trunk funk
Should you let
It get wetter
Would you dare risk it?
The trick a quick dunk
Or could flunk..flick..kerplunk..
Mushy chunk sunk..messy junk
Slushy slunk..in the tea you drunk
So at your leisure
Pleasure one’s self
Don’t regret your stealth
Forget your health
Wealth beset on the shelf
So feeling restive?
Yearn for a digestive?
Appealing…suggestive
No shock..dark choc
What else will cut the mustard
With a brew…for a few bob
Recurring theme..does seem
Will always dream
About a custard cream
Almost sob…as I Lob
A hob-nob in me gob
Ta pour more cha
In fine fettle
Be a slob
Turn on the kettle
Bickies in the jar
On the sofa settle
Sins within tins
Spurn concern
Ignore the racket
As
Hats do doff
Knew from the off
On a roll
The sole goal
Quaff another cuppa
Down your cake hole
Scoff the whole packet!
tell me blue tell me
something that's out I had said
told was true by you
sticks and stones can break
my bones but names will never
hurt ~ my sticks and stones
there are three things that
can't be hid ~ sun moon truth and
your fat ~ make it four
bite the bullet till
you touch lead that will push you
through all your hardships
cry over spilt milk
that in time will sour like your
lamenting facade
bird in hands better
than two in the bush ~ now is
here ~ future is not
do to others that
you'd want them do to you ~ be
good~ if not then run
every cloud has a
silver ring ~ tarnish times be
polished shine next time
a dime a dozen
eighteen hundreds ~ a dime cost
most goods seldom rare
'O Henry Porter
wrote cut the mustard ~ soldiers
pass muster ranks up
hold your horses steads
the whipped horseback that's headstrong
~ patience ease the reins
It used to be that most of us chatted,
Over the fence with our neighbor for free,
Or even climbed over for a cup of tea.
Now most chat online,
Or text each other for a fee.
That does not include a cup of tea.
A letter in the post,
Was a pleasure for most,
Now if we get one it will be from a ghost,
Or a bill that will stop us from eating our toast.
It used to be that credit was hard to get,
And being debt free was a realistic target,
Now credit is hard not to get,
And being debt free is something to forget.
We didn't need to worry about what what was in our food,
As it was mainly grown in our own neighborhood,
Now what was just yummy food,
Is now classed as super food,
That comes from another neighborhood,
And when we can afford this food,
We find some does not cut the mustard in our neighborhood.
Through it all we could rely on some spontaneity,
And even a little gaiety,
Now there is just monotony,
Except for the few of us,
Who still have the habit of being quite friendly,
In a world that does not always treat us kindly.
7/28/17
My soul I will never sell
Even if I got to go through hell
Time will tell
If I'll excel
And propel
Doing poorly or swell
Wherever I dwell
Crooked or parallel from any citadel
And hotel
Are you the lion, cheetah or gazelle?
Can't afford to lack
Got to stay on track
At the drop of a hat
In the daylight or pitch black
Anywhere on the map
They can yap
And talk crap
But we'll see who has the last laugh
Onward and upward
Got to cut the mustard
Without being stubborn
No matter if I get a sunburn
With or without parachute cord
And a sword
Back to the drawing board
Still out to explore for even more
Moving toward
A place far away from the swarm
As well as any horde
Regardless of if it still gets cold and warm
Losing interest or rather adamant and passionate
Occasionally may be the devil's advocate
Among objects in motion or inanimate
Trying my best to stay afloat in ways that are adequate
On purpose this is no accident
What does it feel like, do you feel the same
Do you still have that seductive style
Do you still have a soft, sweet tender young body
Do you still have that come hither smile
Remember it well, those many years ago
Our age has surely changed us both
Even if you resemble Porky Pig or Bugs Bunny
No matter, I now resemble a sloth
Okay, maybe that a bit of an exaggeration
The Porky Pig and Bugs Bunny thing
Bet you can still warble like Celine Dion
Sure would like to hear my love sing
“Smitten” is the word that so aptly applies
To this dude with a receding hairline
This elderly old duffer can still cut the mustard
Can just see me as a CNN headline
Okay enough is enough of this silly banter
The reason I wrote this rhyme
Is just a reminder that I'll love you forever
And that's an extremely long time
© Jack Ellison 2014
Today I had some custard
But it didn't cut the mustard
Though I really thought that it would be the best.
Guess you can't make an assumption
Based on ice-cream loving gumption
That what looks impressive must leave you impressed.
So the next time I'll be cautious;
Though this didn't make me nauseous,
It was mediocre and not up to snuff.
A prediction's surely wasted
'Cause until your tongue has tasted
All that other information's not enough.
Retire To Florida?
By Elton Camp
It’s for old persons with leathery skin
The refuge of every sort of has been
Doctors who can’t hear a heart beat
Butchers who no longer can cut meat
Store clerks who are too old to sell
Musicians now unable to play well
The thief grown too feeble to steal
The card shark who can’t still deal
Bikers who can’t keep a Harley straight
Now a motorized wheelchair do rate
Any who can’t cut the mustard any more
Come knock on the Sunshine State door
Where Social Security rules as king
And income, no state taxes bring
If you can withstand a hurricane,
come to Florida and there remain
Where you get sand in your shoes
Hope that an alligator won’t choose
Or mosquitoes won’t take you away
And huge snakes you can keep at bay
I live in an adult lifestyle community
So what exactly does that mean?
It means most residents are old farts like me
Though there's some under sixty it seems
Don't know why they've chosen this place
With us decrepit and mangy old folks
Must be because their marriage seems safe
No competition from us “over the hill” blokes
The “put out to pasture” phrase comes to mind
Our usefulness no longer is obvious
Except for baking cookies for the craft show
The reports of our value are quite dubious
Here's a fact that us old guys will attest to
Seen it all, done it all, there's no doubt
We've got a whole lifetime of experience to offer
One problem may be our bouts with the gout
I live in an adult lifestyle community
So what exactly does that mean?
Means residents can't cut the mustard anymore
Just chillin' before us guys leave the scene
© Jack Ellison 2012
The decline of rich Men.
The numbers of American millionaires have declined
I read this as a news item and was amused.
I know of an old man who became a lotto millionaire
He had a facelift, and married a young woman.
But time was only on the woman’s side and he couldn’t
Cut the mustard…and sank into despondency.
Clutching dollar bills he went to hospital and begged
Doctors to restore his potency…they could not.
Expensive divorce, lawyers she had the best money
Could buy, and then he as poor again.
His old wife took him in but he has to live in the dog
House, feeds him rice pudding and combs his hair.
The numbers of American millionaires have declined
But I will not speculate on the reason why.
Morning approaches out of another sleepless night
Anticipation gathers around my bedposts come daylight
Decisions made in the dark,they fade away so fast
Was it a dream of consequences related to the past?
Should I disregard the calm I feel as I begin the day?
Maybe I will learn how to get out of my own way!
It's very good to have the strength to seek out all your choices
But not so great when all you hear are everybodys voices
Telling you this and meaning that just doesn't cut the mustard
It leaves you silently indignant and so very flustered
So just follow your voice within,find what you really need
Let the naysayers figure out you won't be taking heed