Funny Clothes Poems

The knights that in histories lurk,
They never wore spandex to work.
O’er heroes today
That dress in this way,
The dragons, they snort and they smirk.
...

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When you are old not much seems new
But technology trolls and cars suck too
I like the old cars with frames solid heavy
Does good a heart...

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The man who a Pharaoh would be
Must dress for success to the T.
The hair 'neath his chin
Must wrap round his shin:
It cannot be just to...

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   My girlfriend grew up in West Virginny
   The mirror told her she was too skinny ~
    ...

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Asleep in the bottom drawer
A place I now call home
I hear a voice call my name
"Sockie, Sockie" where are you 

I am here
I seem to...

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I once met a girl whose name was Heather,
whatever she wore ‘twas always leather.
It rained, it poured, we got all wet,
She said, “this leather smells...

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Always be sarcastic, but not so much that it's rude.
Be very careful to pretend not to notice what others think.
Clothes don't matter, but they do....

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Elasticated waistbands, at what age?
Comfortable trousers are all the rage.
For a mature figure and the oversized,
Some teenager's just take the rise.

Long-sleeved shirts in summer months
Cover...

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What comes of Lady Sugarton  
                  ...

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Just clicked on an ad here --on the side-- for the cutest "sun hat!" :)
But it had no brim, and since I'm not bald-- what's...

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I woke up this mornin' and got stung by a bee
Why is everybody always pickin' on me?
The glaciers are melting and the core's cooling down...

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"Very Bad Girl" read the words
Boldly on the lady's sweater!
Nothing in her deportment or deeds
Took the story any further.

Only, I was left to wonder
Why she...

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Harmless guest


Underneath Zoom chair
Some small creature fleeing in confusion

Ah ha, a brown lizard, harmless four-legged guest

Hiding and scared, aren’t you?
So am I
Please do not visit...

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FANCY DRESS

We went to great pains, my wife and I
To get our costumes right.
We’d won first prize as Tarzan and Jane
Back on New Year’s night
So...

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I dashed off to the ladies' room
just after Sunday School was through.
The service that would soon begin,
I'd relish from my favorite pew.

As I sailed down...

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