Funny Clothes Poems

How do I know,                                         ...

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"All a man really wants, is a girl who looks good in a bikini."
- Jack Freestone

More skin makes my heart pound,    ...

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Just clicked on an ad here --on the side-- for the cutest "sun hat!" :)
But it had no brim, and since I'm not bald-- what's...

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I woke up this mornin' and got stung by a bee
Why is everybody always pickin' on me?
The glaciers are melting and the core's cooling down...

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Living in a house very old,  
it was always drafty and cold.  
Metal stairs to the basement lead,  
from an old pirate's...

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"Very Bad Girl" read the words
Boldly on the lady's sweater!
Nothing in her deportment or deeds
Took the story any further.

Only, I was left to wonder
Why she...

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I stand here beneath a beautiful fig tree,                 ...

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Harmless guest


Underneath Zoom chair
Some small creature fleeing in confusion

Ah ha, a brown lizard, harmless four-legged guest

Hiding and scared, aren’t you?
So am I
Please do not visit...

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FANCY DRESS

We went to great pains, my wife and I
To get our costumes right.
We’d won first prize as Tarzan and Jane
Back on New Year’s night
So...

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I dashed off to the ladies' room
just after Sunday School was through.
The service that would soon begin,
I'd relish from my favorite pew.

As I sailed down...

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Poor Nog Rafi had a funny habit
Unzipped his pants and out came a rabbit
   This really wouldn't do
   For the monks...

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Look at this place I did a sink full of dishes,              ...

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she was always a class act 
she died at 100 
wearing adult  diapers
from PPrada
with two Ps
...

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We bought the get-up
at the local thrift store.
 
I elected to dress like a cop,
much to the amusement
of the female Dollar Store employees
who whistled and...

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My hanger looks like
A bow without an arrow
Hunting what to wear
...

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