Best Stilton Poems
Hickory, dickory, dock.
Jerry the mouse ran up the clock
Tom smelled him from afar
Jumped up on top like a star.
Jerry as always was quite wise.
And with a rod struck Tom’s eyes.
The cat fell nastily on the clock
And received a decisive knock.
But alas the clock fell to the ground.
Mammy Two Shoes with a broom chased Tom around.
Jerry slinked into the kitchen for cheese
Cheddar, mozzarella, stilton and more of these.
But Mammy Two Shoes mad at Tom’s disaster fling,
With a broom chased him to make him sing.
Then threw him in the garden quite dark,
Let Spike bully dog ran after him with a bark.
14 March 20211
Nursery Rhyme 2 Poetry Contest
Sponsored by: Eve Roper
With apologies to Agatha Christie's
for use of her great detective book
Hickory, Dickory Dock.
Categories:
stilton, cat, nursery rhyme,
Form:
Rhyme
I went to a cheese and wine party on Saturday,
where huge platters of cheese were on display.
There was Gorgonzola and creamy white Brie,
I devoured huge chunks with a glass of Chablis.
Danish Blue, Mozzarella and Swiss Emmental,
of course I had to try a sample of them all!
I declined Edam and Gouda, I find them too waxy -
and the last time I ate them I was sick in the taxi!
Soft creamy Camembert and blue Roquefort,
went down a treat with a glass of vintage port.
Crumbly Cheshire and Cheddar were so divine,
and tasted heavenly with red Beaujolais wine.
I’d chomped through all of the Stinking Bishop,
our hostess had to restock the whole dish up!
Then I munched little cubes of Monterey Jack -
if my doctor saw me he’d have a heart attack!
When our host carried in a blue Stilton in a truckle,
I loosened a notch on my now straining belt buckle!
I admit blue cheese can smell like men's sweaty socks
but ripe Stilton and crackers, this cheese simply rocks!
Write a poem about Cheese Contest
Sponsored by Barry Stebbings
FICTION POEM FOR CONTEST
11/12/18
Categories:
stilton, food, humorous,
Form:
Rhyme
I followed milky and mouldy scents,
down cobbled and narrow paths,
only to see it riddled with rats,
feasting on Feta and Camembert,
whilst the wine sipping Uppers prepared to
clash against the cider swigging downers!
The Fromage Frenzy and Curd Craze deli.
across from the Dizzy Duck and the Boastful Bard taverns
had been ransacked with only cracker crumbs on the floor.
All the cheesemongers were hiding in their basements.
All the landlords locked away in their cellars!
Bar stools dripping with Chardonnay and Merlot,
carpets soaked in 'Scrumpy Jack' and 'Strongbow.'
It was utter chaos as the 'cheese shed' raged on...
The goats and the cows watched,
as the town folk gathered on either side.
Anger in their eyes, yelling insults like;
'Cheap cheddar gobblers' and 'stinky Stilton munchers.'
This was not cultural tensions,
nor issues with tariffs, quotas or labelling practises-
this was a war of the social classes!
They were not fighting with fists or weapons,
oh no, no no..
The Downers started squirting stinky cheese sauce,
drenching the Uppers with its reeking stench.
However, when the Uppers started hurling
Storico and Caciocavallo Podolico,
back at the Downers, they simply,
started consuming it with their cider!
Both fractions kept pelting and sprinkling,
until little Joey from the farm,
reminded them the football had started,
so off they plodded to watch the game,
singing and laughing together,
arm in arm, munching on cheese
they had salvaged from their skirmish.
Categories:
stilton, allusion, conflict, society,
Form:
Free verse
Leading his horse in the heat of the day
Been gone a long time but he still knows the way
Just a few shacks when he went for the gold
He’d found a few nuggets but now he’s too old
So, home to the town that he’s heard has expanded
He’s also aware that the town’s been rebranded
He knows he’s too late to catch up with the guy
Who’d bid him farewell but now lives in the sky
He stops on the trail by the boundary sign
He don’t read-n-write but he knows the design
He knows that the words on the board aren’t the same
Must’ve been changed to display the new name
“Howdy, Old timer,” a passerby said
“The hotel’s just yonder for resting your head.”
The prospector said, with a big toothless grin,
“What’s the new name of this town that we’re in?”
“It’s now ‘Milton Creek’, as it says on the sign
It’s new name remembers a good friend of mine.”
The old fella, grinning and shaking his head
Said, “Milt said he’d live on long after he’s dead.
“I used to tell him he was being absurd
but he always was just as good as his word.
To be sure that fella deserved the ovation
But can we just rename the towns in this nation?”
The passerby said, “There are them that makes rules
And then there’s the ones that behave like their mules
But sooner or later things get a bit rich
And the mules all rear up and scratch at that itch
“Soup Creek fell prey to the powers that scheme
With lynchings and lashings an ongoing theme.
There’s cells in the jailhouse where innocents dwell
Soup Creek’s reputation had heard its death knell.
“You see ‘Soup’ emerged as a four letter word,
And good folk would tremble when e’er ‘Soup’ was heard.
So we ditched the mouldy old cheese for best stilton
And renamed our town to remember our Milton.”
The prospector slapped on the passerby’s arm,
“You think I just ran from the old funny farm?
When you said ‘Stilton’ twas just for the rhyme.”
The passerby grinned, “Fella… got it first time.”
Categories:
stilton, western,
Form:
Rhyme
List one: climb up to Machu Picchu,
ride the Orient Express,
see the Terracotta Warriors,
find a monster in Loch Ness,
brave the winds of Patagonia,
hike along an Everest ridge,
visit Paul Gaugin’s Tahiti,
stand on Sydney Harbour Bridge,
stroll round Angkor Wat, Cambodia,
cross the Alps in a balloon,
gaze in awe at Easter Island,
catch a rocket to the moon.
List two: sit in the garden scribbling,
eat a wedge of Stilton cheese,
drink a glass of Chilean Merlot,
watch the sunset through the trees,
play the bass just one more time
in the pub with my rock band,
look both ways then cross the street
holding my granddaughter’s hand,
see my grandson run towards me
smiling, waving, full of life,
meet my son and talk and listen,
phone my daughter, kiss my wife.
Yes. Two lists. There is a reason.
Once I heard a wise man say
Dream as if you’ll live forever;
live as if you’ll die today.
Categories:
stilton, dream, feelings, philosophy,
Form:
Rhyme
Blue Cheese
There is Cheshire, Red Leicester, Emmental and Brie,
Double Gloucester and Edam, a delight for all to see,
Stilton, Caerphilly, or Cheddar mature and mild,
Lots of subtle flavours to drive my taste bud’s wild.
There is Lancashire, Wensleydale or Derby to please,
So why, oh’ why, would you serve me Blue Cheese?
That smelly Blue cheese you know I cannot stand,
Give me Shropshire Mild, or something rather bland.
I don’t want that stinking dairy, in my salad box,
Opening the lid to an odour of sweaty socks.
So, hear my request I am begging of you please,
No more, no more, of that smelly blue cheese.
Categories:
stilton, blue, food, funny, word
Form:
Rhyme
i love to eat, it is my dream to eat and eat,
and while the tastes, to heaven take, I fry
up half a pound of hake, but that is nothing
my lips to take, when in the fiery kitchen bake,
a cake of such proportions make, washed down
with Guinness, then medium steak.
then there’s sweets and candies too, and warm
buttered breads with jams a few and while we’re here,
asparagus spear, with roast potatoes, crispy sear…
yet best of all, in banquet hall, are cheeses firm
and soft; stilton, yarg but that’s not all, there’s
wensleydale matured and tall
so where’s this going I heard you ask, buttered scone,
alimentary task?...well all is simple, plain to see, just
come to mine, share some tea, chocs and toffees,
biscuits rare, we’ll eat the lot, like we don’t care
and as the setting sun rolls down, we’ll scoff at diets with
hearty frown, for ours is not to trim or skip, but simply
moisten cherry lip
Categories:
stilton, food, humor,
Form:
Rhyme
I had some pickled onions,
With stilton cheese and garlic bread:
This breath of love is just for you!
(Although you gag and turn your head…)
for Gayle's contest
Categories:
stilton, romance,
Form:
Rhyme
Dining with devotion
generates joy and satisfaction;
with best food served on the table,
truly, an act of celebration.
I dawdle in getting to the food
to let others take their choice;
my favorites showcase their flavor
filled with a finely made concoction.
Tomatoes seem quite ubiquitous
in many cuisines like Italian flavor;
macaroni and cheese with white truffles
creamy and tasteful, so edible!
Farfalle is my pasta shape of choice,
with gorgonzola, parmigian, or mature Stilton
all good combinations for an Italian version.
Wine, not alt-beer with an enticing taste;
like brands of Goose Island or Uerige Sticke Alt
the choice of many that’s fresh and lively.
A gorgeous fillet of salmon, so delicious!
with adorable broccoli and string beans
a path to healthy meals, an invitation
with distinctive tastes that hail good combinations.
Categories:
stilton, food, imagination,
Form:
Rhyme
What color is it? that luminous llght,
throwing patterns past midnight under my archway,
and on the sandy beach of our island ocean,
where I used to wade home in the surf
from Moore's dance floor, where there was a real,
live band on Labor Day at summer's end,
where window after window facing the roiling
sea brought a salt aphrodisiac, as if
the moon was not enough.
Is it the pale blue blend of Roquefort, or
more like Stilton, color of cream, more radiant
than light spilled by the indecent bright glare
of the Sun God? It's the midnight stare
of the Maid In The Moon, no matter its color.
She wakes us from sleep to place our feet
in her deep-cast beauty, to trouble our hearts
for lost youth and love, and if she's not
made of cheese, as folklore tells us-- No
matter! She brings us to our knees.
Categories:
stilton, visionary, labor day,
Form:
Idyll (Idyl)
Chestnut & stilton pate
Perfect roast turkey
with sweet potato roasties
Glazed sprouts in garlic
Poached clementines
Giving thanks
Bless !
Date Written 12/23/2008
Writing Challenge- December, 2019 - I Want Christmas Poems
Sponsor, Dear Heart - Wiishkobi Ode
Categories:
stilton, anniversary, food,
Form:
Epulaeryu
Aunt Bessie adores eating cheese
The trouble is cheese makes her sneeze
She sneezes gloopy snot
but does not give a jot
and gobbles more Stilton with ease
2/20/19
Categories:
stilton, food, fun, humorous,
Form:
Limerick
There was a poet named Milton
Who never slept in a Hilton
But Paris he knew
And Cambridgeshire, too,
Which is where he bought his Stilton*
* Stilton is an English cheese sans Marmite
Categories:
stilton, humor,
Form:
Limerick
My bone crumbles
Osteoporosis to blame
if bones should crumble then I'll take tumbles
and life won’t be the same
eating calcium rich cheese, so Doc will be pleased
Stilton ~ Cheddar ~ Brie… calcium rich guarantees
no longer are my bones diseased
Cholesterol high ~ statins no cheese ~ Doc grumbles
Written 10th June 2019
2nd PLACE
Contest: Writing Challenge, June 2019, Crumbling Rhyme
Sponsor: Dear Heart
Categories:
stilton, food, health, how i
Form:
Rhyme
See those blue mouldy lines
snake across its creamy
surface. When it’s cut it
smells like dad’s sweaty socks!
Served after dessert with
some crackers, grapes, and Port.
Save some for me to eat!
Stilton is a blue cheese traditionally served after Christmas dinner
My Merry Christmas Party Pleiades Contest Sponsored by Andrea Dietrich
6 syllables per line checked with how many syllables
12~11~16
Categories:
stilton, celebration, christmas, food,
Form:
Verse