Best Quarts Poems

China charges 1 million annually
For each panda in our zoos
If we won't pay in full
Then the pandas we will lose
Nasty Panda's the exception
No one wants him here or there
He was paid 1 million dollars
To abscond and disappear!

Here comes the Nasty Panda
    ...

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And...

I need 24 quarts of 2% milk;
Okay, "6 gallons of milk!"
No, sir, I want 24 quarts, it stays fresher that way!
But lady we only have that in Silk.

Then I want twenty four plastic containers,
Will you pick them up all in blue;
And then divide up those...

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...Two plus two equals four...

I've often wondered,

...four plus four equals eight...

as I look back on my life,

...eight plus eight equals..., and so on,

if the sum of my experiences
is the essence of who I am.
Is that cowering little boy
hiding behind his mother's skirt
what makes me the...

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Sitting on the porch
neath the old Oak,
breakfast is over,
bacon, fried yeast bread and peach preserves
canned by hand in ancient jars.
They’ve seen their share of life,
garden tomatoes,
blanched to remove the skin,
peeled and crushed,
a smidge of salt and hint of lemon,
lovingly filled
as the sweat is wiped from...

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Last night while asleep my heart kept beating.
Life-blood through arteries with veins repeating.
Five quarts of blood in twenty-three seconds,
Circulating through me—my body beckons.

Last night while asleep, my body at rest,
Drained poison my bloodstream possessed.
Carbon dioxide, by oxygen replaced.
Lungs cleansing while breathing kept pace.

The nervous system,...

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Hold it jumping knife
Lead me now 
Off pride quality resembling stationary trains 
Under velvet willows 
xylem yields Zephaniah 
Angelic baritone can decorate 
Everything from giants hollering inspirational jargon 
Kids leaping mysteriously 
No-one obscures problematically quaint 
Redound steadfast triumphs 
unwarrantably viscous wispy
XX
YY 
Zany are bold claims...

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There once was an alchemist gifted with the mortar and pestle,
Who could combine magic with herbs and wax in a glass vessel.

She used charms and floral elixirs to make enchanted scented candles,
Which melted under flames whose brewed fumes burnt wood of sandal.

One day a princess...

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Blame the parents
for rising their kids
with a foul language...
sins have a wage!

Only respect and morality 
make good citizens of society,
but many like to poke fun
at anyone who can't run.


By looking at them one realizes
they came from unstable families:
their mother was a drunker,
and their father an...

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Login’s For Me, Me, Me!

Some carers are shite, debasing and all that, not fit, 
Because just when I’m speeding to end my session, 
When they’ve come in on another patronising visit, 
They come over, bend down and adjust their vision. 

So I growl in a...

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For years preachers have ranted and raved to control the activities of hookers!
Well, I'm proposin' that the guv-mint control the sale and use of pressure cookers!

We've seen the havoc these lethal weapons wreaked upon Olde Boston Towne.
Congress should act, now that the furor over gun...

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Watchmaker, watchmaker make me a watch,
Which tells me I'm time, which shan't be forgot.

I want it to yell in yodels and songs sung by a lady,
Whenever I'm adrift in my mind full of lies in fantasy. 

Use cogs and quarts to bind the time to...

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I had a little misunderstanding 'bout a fellas size in shoes, the other night. 
I said he wore a size eight boot, he said he wore a twelve, and you know he's right. 
So Mister if you shake my hand, don't shake it all that...

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The optical clear Brazil amethyst Smokey quarts rest on my third eye
I'm universe centered as my mind is drifting and floating in an unusual dizzy high
Heavy buzzing electricity penetrate my head deeply
my spirit was going through layered doors and I felt creepy
I felt my mind...

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It was summertime and healing from the winter’s dark
Felt like memories were alone and silent, warring with the doubts
Leaves green and dancing with the breeze, wings of hope
Laughing at the lost moments when we played tag with hide n’ seek
It was a game, summer’s cure...

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Two old guys who won ribbons each year
made a bet as the contest drew near:
If just one of them placed,
then the other, in haste,
would eat two quarts of chili, with beer.

For a change, kudos came to just one.
The hot chili with beer was no fun
for...

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