Best Pitying Poems
I sit here alone...wondering...how much longer this...and in hearing
the question a silent icy fear blankets my body...the answer would
come wearing both masks...tragedy...comedy...this is my life. with
freedom comes death...it hangs over me like a Mexican piñata filled
with chocolate covered blades...so each day firmly slipped into
neutral I exist...barely a choice to live...so I ask myself...how
did I get here...the answer comes thundering from up above...
a dead poet speaks...son that is the path you chose at your fork
in the road... you don't argue the truth...you just throw cold water on
your face...no...you step into a frigid shower...cleanse your thoughts
...stand in defeat happy to feel something even if it is just the pain of
your nerve endings screaming...soaking wet and naked is the only life
you presently afford yourself...there is no one to hear your tears...
what little sound they make rolling down your cheeks...they are not
self pitying but rather wanting...of a loss so deep...what in your own
self appreciation defined you...you want back your art...it...that so
often led you back to the promised land...still you are not that hot
headed fool you once were...you will not stand on the mountain only
to shatter the tablets with their ten commandments...a cooler head
prevails...so you think...like a soap opera...these are the days of my
life...I am strong and vibrant...yes I am and I will walk as slowly as I
must towards my light and yes I will come out the other side a better
man for this.
08~01~2015
Armand
I hardly noticed the first tiny crack,
through the deluge of tears I cried.
Perhaps too numb to feel the sting of pain
or the fissure exposing my wounded heart,
but in sorrow, I chose to ignore it
in the futile hope that it would heal itself.
Adversity seldom vanishes of its own accord.
The cause of my anxiety increased tenfold
as larger pieces of me fractured and snapped.
My fragility was as bare as my soul,
both unprotected and vulnerable.
Wounds no bandage could cover or conceal.
My exterior had become a brittle shell,
falling around me in sharp edged shards.
The obvious camouflaged the obscure.
I had to be brave if I was going to heal.
I wanted no Humpty Dumpty Canticle
sung by pitying voices on my behalf.
The wall I once climbed no longer held me up
but I had learned to restrain my weakness
and the need to lean upon it as a crutch.
I motioned for the King's men to mount
and continue along on their journey.
If I was to be rescued, I swore to do it myself.
Carefully, I gathered each shattered fragment,
every crushed dream that had been broken.
I nurtured my wounds until my lamenting heart
stopped bleeding as we hobbled our way home
to be made whole once more.
January 6, 2023
2022 Poetry Marathon Mile 24
Sponsored by Mark Toney
Thank you Ma, for not imposing your thoughts on me
You let me listen to myself.
Thank you Ma, for not thrusting your beliefs on me,
You let me frame self opinions.
Thank you Ma, for not solving all my problems,
You let me win over them myself.
Thank you Ma, for not often pitying on me,
You let me take difficult turns.
Thank you Ma, for not voicing on my behalf,
You let me speak my mind and heart.
Thank you Ma, for not finishing my incomplete classwork
You let me pay for wrong doings.
Thank you Ma, for not pushing me into something I don't like,
You let me choose the path I love.
Thank you Ma, for not taunting me for my wrong choices,
You let me correct them myself.
Thank you Ma, for not rushing me into a relationship,
You let me be wise and matured enough.
Thank you Ma, for not being a worried mother of a daughter,
You let me be me, by always being by me.
You let me frame an identity
You let me dance to the tides I encountered
You let me shout my heart
You let me sing to the uncertainties of worse.
I don't say Thank God, I say Thank Mom.
I don't say God's grace, I say Mom's grace.
Because
who I saw,
who I heard,
and who I felt
is YOU.
Ive danced with the devil a thousand times,
disowned my family and commited crimes,
lost relationships and lived on the street,
and still i would not accept defeat.
Ive created so many different personalitys,
adapted my life to so many reality's,
Ive fort,lied,stole and blagged,
picked butts off the floor when ive had no fags,
and still i would not accept defeat.
Ive trusted and lost,lost and trusted,
been in a house when its been busted,
begged money in the street from total strangers,
put myself in life into all sorts of dangers,
and still i would not accept defeat.
pretended to be someone im not,
taken drugs and lost the plot,
anything in life, just to fit in,
lived a life of every day sin,
and still i would not accept defeat.
ive pushed anyone who cared away,
women who loved me i would play,
selfish,malipuative,unpreadictable and devious,
self pitying,scared,depressed and mischevious,
and still i would not accept defeat.
A driven desire in search of happiness,
self sabotaged,lazy,scandalous, and shabbyness,
drank every drink there is to drink,
depths of despair i had to sink
and still i would not accept defeat.
Rejected
Defected
A hopeless case
Lost, drifting
Vanished without a trace
Sorrowing, woeful
Mired in despair
Anguished
Frustrated
Tearing out fistfuls of her hair
Lonely, yearning
Trapped in solitude
Hoping for a pitying hand
To raise her up and help her stand
Desperate, on edge
Whirling this way and that
Frantic, caged
Like a hissing wild cat
Untamed, undisciplined
An unbroken horse
No kindness, no softness
Her spirit so unyielding and coarse
Is there any hope for her now?
To whom can she turn?
Who would want this rebel child...?
Who can lure her in from the wilds?
Perhaps there is nothing left for this witch
But the muzzle of a gun,
Pressed to her cheek,
The squeeze of a trigger
So obliging and meek
And the crack of the bullet
Splintering her skull
The closing eyes
The graceful fall
And then...
The bloody bittersweet end of it all
Children give me pitying stares, At least I'd at home,
Pointing and screaming, Home,Sweet Home,
Giving my cubs a scare. Home in my forest,
Deep in China.
Keepers poke around my space,
Making me uncomfortable, When I'm lost and feeling alone,
In my place. I'd like to think that I was at home,
Back In my Home,
Adults think me as a comic pet, In China
Laughing and cheering,
It's like putting me under a net. At least I'd be at home,
Home, Sweet Home,
Teenagers think nothing of me, Home in my forest,
The past, the present, the future to come Deep in China.
I'm stuck in captivity,
Why can't they see?
Toddlers look,
As if I'm a wolf,
I'm nothing from a story book.
If I was back in my home,
Back in China,
It would be dream come true.
My brothers and sisters,
Would be waiting for me,
We would play together,
Out in the trees.
I would still live in fear,
From gunners and destruction,
But I would be at home
My heart is poinsettia red,
You have filled it with Your own dear blood,
My love in return to all others spread,
None do You exclude, tho you could.
Our efforts to give wax so pitying,
Next to Your humble babe's crying,
Even so, tho some decry harried gift-giving,
It is in such giving we are living, nor dying.
Explosions of shiny foil red blue and green,
The most novel expressions Man's ever seen.
What's too much for me, if I am quieter,
Let everyone be, the gaudier the better!
Lights on trees, doorways and stores,
Echo that star that bids us yore.
Hail, hail, the bells, let red hearts sing out!
You live in us - there is no doubt!
And my heart is poinsettia red.
Happy Valentines Day ... or for the rest of us
"It Sucks to Be Single Day"
Bring on the chocolate and the chick flicks.
For single girls, this is our kicks.
No one will send us flowers this year.
This holiday is not for we singles I fear.
Couples in restaurants, couples in parks,
couples in the movie theatre setting off sparks.
For them its a holiday like no other.
Their sappy little faces we'd like to smother.
T.V. commercials and our families take care
to remind us we're single while love's in the air.
Yes, we're alone on Valentine's Day.
No roses or jewels are headed our way.
No secret admirers , no Valentine's card.
For this one day, being single is hard.
Of Valentine's day we've all had enough.
Please no pitying looks, we're just not that tough.
So we'll call this "It sucks to be single's day"
.....Now pass the chocolate..... and just go away.
Dear Self,
I'm oh so sorry I let you down, so many uncountable times
Sorry I ignored your cries and pretended I didn't hear them, though they were all
what was ringing in my ears
I'm so sorry I didn't listen to you and thought I was Ok without you
Sorry I left you crying your heart out in the rain while I had such a good time
Left you shattered at home, sealed in a closet, ashamed of yourself
Hoping to come home and not find you
All I can do is stroke this gentle pen on this paper
Stroke down my feelings,
For you
My broken words are all I have to offer
The years floated by so quickly
Like an idiot I sat there and watched, afraid to blend in
Where were my motives, my burning passions, my hunger for life?
For all those I needed Hope, a candle put out by reality a long time ago
—or was it by me?
Sorry again, for being the weak link in such a strong chain
For being the letter left not mailed, the uncooked meal
The unpainted painting, the unaccomplished plan
The loser of the battle for survival
Sorry for being a wilted petal, a worn out tree in such a strong thunderstorm
called Life
Sorry for being so scared to move
So glued to my spot, afraid to budge, face the world
I'm now paying with my crimson regret, I assure you, if it makes you feel any better
Please forgive me, I beseech you
I know I cancelled reality long ago, to float my way through fantasy, wait for
dreams to come true by themselves
Watched my heart crumble in the wind and my hope fly away like ashes
I kept wishing beneath brilliant stars, kept blowing eyelashes and looking for four-
leafed clovers
It all went in vain, and left you there watching me, pitying me, crying for me
Please find it in your heart to forgive me, and I hope we can start all over again,
working together this time…
Sealed with a kiss of everlasting love,
Me
Should you fear the difference in me
Should you fear the depth of my essence
Should you fear the unfamiliar personality
The independent nature, the unusual originality
Pray, lower your swords, throw them away
And raise up your hands to throw at me your commands
Yes, know that I mean you no harm
Know that I remain a submissive soul
Submissive and obedient to the ways of life
Care I solely to have my uniqueness accepted
As I accept that of yours and that of the rest of the world!
Fear not the unexplored ocean that rages in me
Fear not the soothing notes that are played by my heart
Fear not the wolves that protect my body
Fear not the distant gaze that I throw upon you
Know that I've seen both the higher realms and the lower ones
Know that I've chosen to wear a crown of flowers on my head
Know that I'm a peaceful soul
Meaning not to shatter your brittle soul
For I've already had mine torn apart; and; sewn back
By the Goddesses of Heaven, who, pitying me,
Gave me my difference as a boon of mercy!
Pray, come, come and sit with me in the mystical bond
That binds us, together, we shall weave words
Words, which have never been read as such, on Earth!
In the darkness of a cold stormy night
You snuffed out the little flame of my life
Why did I let go without a try
May be the abandoned infant in me could no longer cry
Despite all the wisdom from your age you gained
Beating this little child, to you was fair game
How could I protect myself when I was so frail and thin
You put an end to my story before it could begin
I had the face of an angel and like a feather I weighed
But I was your nemesis, so your cruel heart said
With swollen lips I cried helplessly through the night
But the world turned away without pitying my plight
I hope you are happy with your accomplishment
May God reward you, not deliver punishment
Although I am a little child,I pray for you
I have a large heart, I forgive you
I wish she were dead
If she were dead
May be then i could have
Had enjoyed her lie by me
As deep nights surround us.
If she were dead
May be all she stood for
Would be immortalized
On cold stony floors.
If she were dead
May be the fantasies would cease
That supersede reality
But love never dies
That's what they said.
Humbly i bow, facing the end,
As I've found, painfully, what life really meant.
A fate all men face
The inevitable end to the rat race
we see, we feel, we fear
What lies beneath our apathetic face.
Hoping against all odds
That beyond the doors of our faults
Redemption, forgiveness, paradise,
Await us, our self-pitying lies.
In truth the summer dies.
Monsoon's rains and winter's skies
All hail the endless cycle
The toil of years gone by. Our demise,
Unquestionable obedience to Thy will.
Would she regret it?
Would she pray for one more chance?
I swear by my death bed
i'd pray for one more dance.
One more time to stare into her eyes,
One more sight, one more love driven crime.
I wish she were dead
May be then i could live for
Another future, faded within our closed,
Hidden destines.
I wish i was dead.
In another life i'd choose
Another path i'd fall in to.
Another choice, i'd fold in two.
No, i know..
Given my breath once more
Without a second glance over my shoulder,
in a promiscuous heart beat
I'd choose this this life once more.
Gomer
Pretty fool, beautiful
you laid down
you got down
with your lover Wooo!
what you do now no ones pitying you now
you now unfaithfulness to the Lord
You though he loved you now
you walked away from your first love
You thought he loved you child
there's more than his manhood
He's a man-child
Gomer
Unfaithful to the Lord just a whore
What if you prayed
Why? Didn't you stay
Yet you strayed no longer a virgin
Now you're a burden
Gomer
It is more than his manhood
He's a man-child
Gomer
unfaithful to the Lord just a whore
Why did she pray
Why didn't you stay?
Yet she strayed
No longer a virgin now
You unfaithful to the Lord
Just a whore where are you now
How can the government and the village must now help you child
You should have kept your dress down
You should have kept your pants on
Modern Gomer
unfaithful to the Lord
just a whore
He done got what he wanted
You thought he loves you but he doesn't
He just came alone came along to hit
His 6 minutes of pleasure now quit it-(acquitted)
Now going to give you nine months of misery,
Gomer
Just a whore- unfaithful to the Lord just like Israel
6/3/22
Written words by James Edward Lee Sr.2022©
KUTUB MINAR
A
Line
Upright
Reminds
A slave
A king
A court
Witness
Intrigues
Pitying
Avariced
Thrusts
Miseried
Minions
Staring
Baring
Nothing
Form: Shape
LOTUS TEMPLE
Peacock
Park.Touching turf.
Gem afloat flowing grace
A pinnacle. Where is the prince.
Claustrophobic confines open out now
Opened up. What vibrant white trance.
I turn a clairvoyant
I’m everywhere
Peace, peace
Form: Rictameter
For Catie Lindsey's contest.
Things before our sight
We did not realize true value
Shadow when realized us
Beam enters eye to continue
Say: Not salvation pitying
Loss of wings mid-day
It has become dream to flying
Is the truth, to wind?
Seagulls cordial
Beautiful roses in grove
Mothers to subsequent
Face your father always bright
Who loss of his father
Tasted bitterness of existence
He lived alone with fullness of the universe
Would offset tremulous
Way episode to append