Dear Self
Dear Self,
I'm oh so sorry I let you down, so many uncountable times
Sorry I ignored your cries and pretended I didn't hear them, though they were all
what was ringing in my ears
I'm so sorry I didn't listen to you and thought I was Ok without you
Sorry I left you crying your heart out in the rain while I had such a good time
Left you shattered at home, sealed in a closet, ashamed of yourself
Hoping to come home and not find you
All I can do is stroke this gentle pen on this paper
Stroke down my feelings,
For you
My broken words are all I have to offer
The years floated by so quickly
Like an idiot I sat there and watched, afraid to blend in
Where were my motives, my burning passions, my hunger for life?
For all those I needed Hope, a candle put out by reality a long time ago
—or was it by me?
Sorry again, for being the weak link in such a strong chain
For being the letter left not mailed, the uncooked meal
The unpainted painting, the unaccomplished plan
The loser of the battle for survival
Sorry for being a wilted petal, a worn out tree in such a strong thunderstorm
called Life
Sorry for being so scared to move
So glued to my spot, afraid to budge, face the world
I'm now paying with my crimson regret, I assure you, if it makes you feel any better
Please forgive me, I beseech you
I know I cancelled reality long ago, to float my way through fantasy, wait for
dreams to come true by themselves
Watched my heart crumble in the wind and my hope fly away like ashes
I kept wishing beneath brilliant stars, kept blowing eyelashes and looking for four-
leafed clovers
It all went in vain, and left you there watching me, pitying me, crying for me
Please find it in your heart to forgive me, and I hope we can start all over again,
working together this time…
Sealed with a kiss of everlasting love,
Me
Copyright © Omar Dew | Year Posted 2006
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