Best Housefly Poems
I chased that thing all morning
But he always got away
He must have found a hiding place
Somewhere safe to stay
He was on the kitchen table
Then on the bedroom door
I probably looked like an idiot
Crawling across the floor
I chased him to the fireplace
Then too the window screen
On to the kitchen counter
Was the last place he was seen
While trying to eat my breakfast
He just sit there staring at me
I finally caught him just for a second
But again that thing got free
I decided that he was smarter than me
So I gave up and went to bed
That's when I heard a mighty swat!!!
For my wife had killed him dead
Categories:
housefly, funny
Form:
Rhyme
continued from Pt 1
With my name underneath!/ I said "Who is keith?"/ She looked over her shoulder,/
The room got colder,/ When she harshly whispered "you!"/ That's when she rose from her
seat, and with her feet started using Kung-Fu./ Like she was a Kangaroo!/ She beat me
black and blue./ Then I heard her scream "That's for taking advantage of my virtue!/
When I finally came too, I was moist with dew./ I felt sick and prayed it was not swine
flu!/ I found a Doctor nearby./ He was also a Rabbi./ I had a lot of ails including pinkeye./
He cured me and took me into the "matrix" like on Sci-Fi./ He then taught me the ways of
the samurai!/ I was now ready, for with one hand I could catch a housefly!/ I adjusted my
necktie, and told the Rabbi goodbye./ I began my next journey under the blue sky./ Off
after that whore I must rectify!/
Note: for Constance La France contest "A Magical Journey" - If I offended anyone with this
piece I apologize It was written only to be morbidly humourous.....
NOTE: Had to alter for contest because of size. This is the actual way it ends. Jimmy
Categories:
housefly, depression, funnyme, me,
Form:
Free verse
Day 1
I sit to write in peaceful solitude,
while words of tranquil elegance exude
visions of nature's beauty and soft light,
but it's not my muse which has taken flight.
A bastard housefly sails a curvy path,
as irritation grows to rage and wrath.
Essentially, the reason is because
this little jerk emits a galling buzz.
When I think the skumbag's finally stopped,
and I could hear it if a pin were dropped,
the excrement eating insect starts again,
an insidious attack upon my brain.
You would not think a creature who is this small
could find a way to bother me at all,
and yet he drives me completely daft and nuts,
until upon my window, I see his guts.
Day 2
Awaking from a frightful fever dream,
I hear a buzz, and choke down a helpless scream.
The window guts, a subconscious, wishful scene,
before I slept, I missed with the magazine.
One slight move, he's no longer stationary.
Have I misjudged this pint-size adversary?
His flight is like 3-D billiards in the halls,
bouncing off unseen, invisible walls.
Why has this beast chosen me to torment,
to lead me in my sanity's descent
to Hell, a place I would gladly send him
if my worthless Westways could only rend him.
Yet, I said, "fly to the screen door, for once,
and we'll both be free, you insectoid dunce".
A desperate jack o'lantern, I am hollow.
Everywhere I go, he seems to follow.
Perhaps, the little guy has something to say,
tracing the 3-D model of DNA.
Does he buzz the hundred thirty-seventh psalm?
Could it be that last week, I killed his mom?
Day 3
Hopefully, I think the fly's diminished,
and that soon this monster will be finished.
He seems to be flying slowly like he's drunk.
His decibel measure significantly shrunk.
He's fast and young, but he's aging faster,
giving me the better odds to plaster
him. Who will be victorious in the end?
On whose nerves are made of steel, it will depend.
Day 4
Dead on the floor, two haggard creatures lay.
In one's hand, "you're just like a summer's day".
Categories:
housefly, death, humor, insect,
Form:
Rhyme
(Dedication: For Dave Wood, the Lyric Man)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Teary moonlight
Flash from heaven;
Lovers unite
~~~~~~~~~
Teenage lover boy
Bus-stop waiting;
Delayed arrival
~~~~~~~~~
Nicotine addict
Puffing for dear life;
Carcinogenic highs
~~~~~~~~~
Grass blades
Protrude through cracks;
Sidewalk stone slabs
~~~~~~~~~
College vacation
Rowdy students arguing;
Monsoon weather hurls
~~~~~~~~~
Housefly fly past
Unceremoniously;
Decadent visit
~~~~~~~~~
Stars decorate
Night sky twinkling;
Croaking August frogs
~~~~~~~~~
Anxious To-Do List
Smudge of raindrops;
Go with the flow
~~~~~~~~~
Crazy poet laughs
Mad self-talk;
Intoxicating grief
~~~~~~~~~
Back track then
To nowhere far;
Celestial timing
~~~~~~~~~
Words carved
Old tree trunk code;
Open secret
~~~~~~~~~
Grassy flowers
Humble affirmations;
Perennial song
~~~~~~~~~
Stray voices call
In these woods;
Bird song melody
~~~~~~~~~
Romantic ideas
Dehydrated fruits;
Winter sonata
~~~~~~~~~
Self-made home movie
Unknown stars;
Awkwardly famous
~~~~~~~~~
Leon Enriquez
15 August 2014
Singapore
Categories:
housefly, allusion,
Form:
Haiku
1.
Tired and desperate,
I walked out of the house
and out of poverty!
2.
The housefly perches
again on the cow dung
and back to our food!
3.
The sun sets by itself
Leaving nothing behind,
Not even a shadow.
4.
The sun rises this morning
Frowning at yesterday
and its sins.
5.
Birthdays,
Boys drink to stupor
Beautiful girls hide behind makeups.
6.
A green snake
Fork-tongued, licking from my tap
I, holding a bucket and a towel helplessly.
7.
The mosquito,
Pot-bellied from my blood,
Escapes through my clutched fingers!
Categories:
housefly, beautiful, birthday, encouraging, environment,
Form:
Haiku
A tree trunk spider was listening to a conversation between
An elderly Sparrow and a Housefly and got annoyed with how they talked.
So he dropped down in a single strand of silk and said,
“Hey you guys, birds are supposed to eat flies,
Not talk to them like a member of the family!”
“That’s a myth, a legend, a fairytale” said the fly to the spider.
“No it’s not, its Mother Nature’s way,” said the spider to the Housefly.
Unexpectedly the spider moved his legs like lightning strikes
And used his fangs and ate the fly for lunch.
Then the elderly sparrow flew toward the clouds to hide
And the spider went up his single strand of silk to take a nap.
That’s when I woke up from a long winter’s nap
And began to wonder about this Mother Nature lady
Who invented the rules for who could talk to whom, and who could eat who
No matter the time of day or time of night.
Categories:
housefly, age, earth, imagination, nature,
Form:
Free verse
One day i watched a housefly perish.
A memory i'd never hold or cherish.
A soul escaped his writhing mass
magnified by looking glass.
I swore i'd seen its final breath
and knew i'd been its cause of death.
Insignificant i know God slap my wrist!
Oh lord i wish the fly swat missed.
Categories:
housefly, funny
Form:
Rhyme
a neighborhood dog would cry
while eating rhubarb pie
so we added honey
and this made him runny
till he morphed into a housefly.
Categories:
housefly, butterfly, cute, dog, fun,
Form:
Limerick
There's a fly in the house
Buzzing around
Driving me nuts
With his buzzing sound.
I get the fly swatter
It's here in my hand
I wait and I watch for that sucker to land.
Then ever so slowly I lift my arm
Intention to pounce with a flap
Down comes the thunder
I'm swift and I'm quick
But just not as quick as all that.
I swat with a vengeance
In midflight air
He moves lickety split
First he's here, then he's there.
Don't get too comfortable
You housefly from Hell
For my house is not your place to dwell.
Categories:
housefly, house,
Form:
Rhyme
It was a righteous hit and the silky smooth euphoric familiar feeling was racing through her veins to her encephalon.
It was an energetic stimulation to her central nervous system.
Her whole body fell back onto the foul-smelling and heavily stained mattress.
Her mind slumped into oblivion.
Her eyes rolled to the back of her head.
The last thing she remembers seeing was a vivid shadow.
A shadow of a housefly on the ceiling.
It appeared to be eating something.
Through a purple haze, she wonders about the filthy creature.
In nonsensical supposition, she could feel the beastly fly attack.
Scissoring meticulously against the flesh of her forehead.
Scissoring against the hard connective tissue of her skull.
Systematically and relentlessly thrusting its cutting blades.
Regurgitating its vile acid fluid onto the soft tissue of her cerebrum.
Imaginable pain and reverberation of the piercing sound were consistent.
And then, the morning light faded.
She saw luminous colors of red, yellow, and different shades of blue, like cyan and turquoise.
She felt her body floating around in a large kaleidoscope.
copyright 2016 Torsional Storm
Categories:
housefly, addiction,
Form:
Narrative
Creator V Imitator
God created a bee
giving honey for free
Devil, housefly
cholera an' dysentery.
God bestows rain
to sprout the grain
Devil, drought
giving people naught.
God made all rivers
an' aquatic divers
Devil, desert
Thirst an' no dessert.
God made the Sky
so that we can fly
Devil, Hell
Where it is not well!
God alone Above
made piety an' love
Devil, Hate
an' unending fate.
God created Life,
mirth and not strife
Devil, Dearth
an' a coffin wreath.
God created Mars
and all the stars
Devil, Diarrhoea
an' epilepsy of Maria!
God created bowers
with racy flowers
Devil, Thorns
prickly as his horns!
God created a voice
for both girls an' boys
Devil, numbness
an' stark dumbness.
God created sight
in gloom to see light
Devil, Blindness
and infinite darkness!
God created taste
to savour soup o' paste
Devil, things bitter
that tongues fritter.
God created sound
where melodies abound
Devil, Discord
like a broken record.
God created 'Soupers'
never to be floppers
Devil, all so prosaic
blind to poetic mosaic!!!
08th Sept' 2013
Categories:
housefly,
Form:
Rhyme
Emperor dragonfly had a ball
Stag beetle came big and tall
Water springtail brought housefly date
Common cockroach came without a mate
Eyed hawkmoth arrived in style
Caught ladybug’s winsome smile
Praying mantis brought sense of doom
Other mantises quickly left the room
Green lacewing came with water spring tail
Silverfish brought rest of supper from jail
Cicadas arrived with bottles of ale
Unusual feather bug came smelling quite stale
Bumblebee brought fresh honey and wax
Colorado potato beetle was holding his flax
Black ants brought chips from master’s house
Only one empty handed was elderly book louse
Morpho butterflies arrived dressed to dance
You could hear the music half way to France
Emperor Dragonfly’s shindig was a huge success
Firefly made magic with his sexy light up mistress
Everyone had a fine time except Praying Mantis who left mad.
Best Shindig ball the host, Emperor Dragonfly had ever had!
Categories:
housefly, 2nd grade, 3rd grade,
Form:
Rhyme
Swimming in the pool of despair
They conclude that the world is unfair
But not all people are fair
(light skin)
Or fair
(impartial)
I see pretty women; dark and fair
With short and long hair
O yes, I look at them not because they are fair
No. I look at them because I expect them to be fair
(with life)
Women, look closely and you would realize that your breasts are not fair in size
Do not be shy
One is slightly bigger than the other
Men, look closely and you would realize that your testicles are not fair in size
Do not be shy
One is slightly bigger than the other
Women, why aren’t you all having buttocks with the same size?
O the creator has some sense of humour and diversity
I see ladies passing by, attached with big and small buttocks
Slim and fat buttocks
Dark and fair buttocks
Light and heavy buttocks
Gentle and arrogant buttocks
O! Buttocks with diverse shapes, colours, sizes and characteristics
Women believe that the world is not fair so
They take in pills and injections just to change the size of their breast and buttocks
Men also believe that the world is not fair so
They want to be hard like the rock
They want to be long like a python on a rock
Like a housefly, they defile their matrimonial bed and lift up their arms in the air like the famous wrestler, the ROCK
Burnt in evil passion, men and men engage in an abominable act because they think it’s fair
You do all these because you believe that life is unfair?!
I believe that life is fair
Because not all are fair
God wants you to be fair in an unfair situation
You know why?
Because that is designed to make you strong in life!
The fact is that life is not fair
But the truth is that life is fair
So in all your thoughts and deeds, be fair
Because the Lord is always fair.
Categories:
housefly, abuse, bible, humanity, i
Form:
Verse
We deploy a cat
to get rid of a field-mouse
But why swat a 'housefly'
when it's inside the house
Categories:
housefly, insect, word play,
Form:
Epigram
Their honks were like buzzes
From a desperate housefly;
Streams of smoke blurred the air
As the metallic insects cued up
On the road beaming the light of the night
Like a trapped lampyridae in a race-field
Its moves in snail-pace
Overtaking the unfortunate scraps
With broken eyes and disfigured body
Again, the honk increases
Like a trumpet from an elephant nostril
There came a monstrous millipede
Pregnant with commotion
It cuddled up few insects with one squeeze....
BANG!!!!!
Categories:
housefly, journey,
Form:
Free verse