Best Former Poems
For years I wore
your shame as my own
and lived unknown
in terror of being seen
like a leper
self-quarantined
intrinsically unclean
Your neglect
became to me
my insignificance
undeserving of your glance
Your abuse
became to me
my fault and utter blame
my soiled but rightful name
Your abandonment
to me
was my unworthiness
unfit and valueless
'Til this layered shame became
a camouflaging cloak
wrapped about with care
disguising me as if
I wasn't even there
How I avoided them
my friends so true
for they could plainly see
the agony in me
and I couldn't control
it radiating through
Yet butterflies won't stay bound
in crippling cocoons
integrity impugned
by wings that cannot fly-
and I at last have found
the answer to my wounds
in exposing you
and all your lies
You were cruel-
I do matter
You were guilty-
I am not to blame
You were unfit-
I am worthy
You nearly destroyed me-
But I overcame
Now my only dread is
of leaving this world
as un-notably as I came
as invisibly as I lived
to be known only
by others
as unredeemed as
you thought me to be-
No! the truth
will set me free...
I humbly give
this cloak to you
it was yours to wear
not mine to share
I'm through
I'm through
I'm through.
A Former Love has
returned into my life.
I'm not too sure
it's wrong or if it's right.
He once made me feel special
in so many different ways.
It's starting again,
I'm daydreaming all day.
The same old butterfly feelings
are fluttering in the pit of my belly.
Again my heart is awakening,
I'm feeling a little silly.
Do I open my heart
and my arms once again?
Or turn away for fear,
That I may not win?
I'm not sure which way
to let my feelings go.
I do not want to get hurt,
this I do know.
With the idea that life is too short,
I will give this love another chance,
hoping and praying we can begin
a new song and dance.
Lament Of A Former Dark Soul
I was: once darken shadow of a real man
Those I met soon found me so very bad
Like false gold in a rusty, shallow pan
Time eventually revealed me an evil cad
I was: the partaker of my own laments
A demon hellbent on satisfying my lust
Broken down, scarred covered in dents
Charming for sure but not one to trust
I was: a mist that wraps and engages
Smooth talker, master of the love arts
A dark, evil force when in my rages
Ripping many kind, loving hearts apart
I am: now an angel that found the Light
A prayer offered, the blessing found me
Seeking truth and mercy, all thats right
Away from darkness my soul did then flee
I am: a voice that cries to be so kind
Once wretched spirit giving out pain
Light brought truth invading my mind
That darkness, never shall return again
I was: once darken shadow of a real man
Those I met soon found me so very bad
Like false gold in a rusty, shallow pan
Time eventually revealed me an evil cad
Robert J. Lindley, 04-27-2015
Note : A sinner was I. Not as bad as my write portrays(poetic leeway) but
bad enough to see my former self in true light.
Don't blame me, my muse forced this one out of me!
I hope I did not shatter any images of my kind, and generous
self...
Ode To A Former Wild Life
Drank too hard, rode my horses too fast
didn't give a damn if my body did not last
Midnight was a bell for me to pour it on
get wasted until my head felt like a stone
Pretty gals, O' how they spun my wheels
woo'ed them as I pleased, made no deals
Passionate nights spent dancing in the bed
plenty of time for sleep after I am dead
Life was just a big box to rip'er open
bigger thrills , prettier gals I was hoping
Once a spirited mustang, wild as all hell
wildest things I did I dare not to tell
Memories good or bad often can not decide
yet one thing is sure, had one helluva' ride
Memories good or bad , often know not which
yet having none at all would be a real *****!
Robert J. Lindley , 04-18- 2015
I dedicate this poem to you,
The one who I used to call "friend",
"Best friend", or maybe even "sister".
Yes, you meant that much to me,
And I thought I meant as much to you.
No, maybe not as much, but at least a "best friend".
Did I ask for too much?
Was that too selfish of a request?
I thought that we'd be best friends forever,
I really did.
But I guess it was all just a fantasy,
A fragment of my imagination.
After all, reality is a much harsher place.
I think I only realized that after you walked away;
After you walked away and never looked back
And left me in a deep, dark pit of torment,
Wondering why you'd changed.
If I'd done something different, would you still be the same?
Of all the people beside me, I never would have guessed that
You would be the one to leave me like this.
And as I watched from a mile away,
How well off you seemeed without me,
I fell into a sea of depression.
For the longest time,
I felt so lonely,
Questioning myself whether anyone truly needed me.
Or was I only just second choice?
Now, as I am writing this poem,
I cannot say that I have been completely healed.
I still feel the doubt, the uncertainty,
When someone says
"I love you"
Or
"You are my best friend"
Even when I know that it is all in my head.
But I think I can say with confidence that
I have become stronger,
Even if just a little bit,
Even though sometimes
I still miss you.
Dearest, former self
I hope this finds you well
I’ve learned a thing or two
From this weathered, carousel
It will not cease to spin
And knows of no reverse
You can count on ups and downs
In this ironic universe
Be forewarned, the paint will chip
The music will grow tired
Read my words aloud
Apply knowledge you acquire
Seating arrangements are subject to change
The ride shuffles when it sees fit
Alternating angles, perspective and friends
We almost never want, but need it
It will make a few stops along the way
Some exit and new will board
There’s time to mourn and it ends too soon
My apologies for being straight forward
I thought maybe if I could caution
I could suppress the initial shock
I can arm you with wisdom and truth
But no one can stop the clock
During the '70's, deep in the South,
I was white but raised black by a black man.
As a boy, I have watched the Ku Klux Klan
on the news—and was frightened as a youth
who felt “black.” In those times, it was uncouth
and a mark of disgrace to be less than
the child of a white mother and white man:
even back then I knew that racist truth.
Two-score years have passed and I’m still confused,
troubled, and unclear as to what or how
I should be: am I white—or “black”? (Abused
by my step-dad, I identify with him now.).
It’s terrible being me. But scarred like this,
(and once raised as black) I now loathe prejudice.
I was renowned as Chief Buffalo Chips, a great leader of many tribes.
I was given that pathetic name by my father resulting in a heap of gibes.
But with a name like his, Chief Tater Chips, what else could I expect,
So I had to count many coup in battle to gain my braves' respect!
I rode my pinto pony as free as the wind, as free as the eagle soars.
I smeared my bronzed body with colorful hues to enjoy the thrill of wars.
With bow and arrow true, I supplied my tribes with plenty buffaloes,
To feed and clothe the old and young to see them through winter snows!
I smoked the peace pipe with blue coats but they were wont to deceive,
But I got my revenge at Little Big Horn where I won my tribes' reprieve!
Many moons later The Great White Father set up a fund for Indian Relief.
(For some reason Libby Custer refused to donate due to a spiteful beef!)
My humble teepee housed many papoose and Red Deer my prolific squaw,
Plus her grumpy mother, Black Widow, my miserable mother-in-law!
When this mortal shell I shed, I thought I'd escaped eternal reprobation,
Only to find Black Widow in the Happy Hunting Ground! Oh! Such damnation!
Robert L. Hinshaw, CMSgt, USAF, Retired
(c) 2014 All Rights Reserved
Placed No. 3 in Carolyn Devonshire's " Past Lives" Contest - June 2014
I have experience as burlesque hyper
Like good policeman Chippendale stripers
A smile on my face
Bare in public place
In church Sundays… mama changed my diapers!
For and in honor of Miranda Lambert
And contest: Burlesque Boutique
How the thought of her smiling, sick, rude face
repels me. What ever was I thinking?
My time lost in her sickening embrace
was loathsome, base, gross, foul, vile, and stinking!
O, why gave I myself to one so whorish?
So eager was I to love; young, naive,
and simple, I failed to see then how boorish
she was—so blinded was I to receive
her. In hindsight, I would undo the past,
and remain forevermore a virgin—
pure, and chaste! No shame's in that; but the waste
of not reserving myself was my sin.
For me, carnal knowledge came at great price;
I've learned my lesson, and I'll not err twice!
Outside the city, tasty pomegranates grow,
the Wakefields look forward to delayed honeymoon.
British coffee merchant, James was raised in Bordeaux.
Each day, they sample wines after lunch, after noon;
sober sweethearts smile, their selections apropos.
New to their palates - pomegranate/cranberry,
two acidic fruits, both improve in the blending;
secret recipes mix sweetness with pungency.
The two lovers delve in, raw tastes that are trending;
mixing with dry merlot, a cheese rich and creamy.
James relishes sharing his past with Mallory,
his new bride of three weeks and his dearest delight.
It is here, she'll meet his extended family.
It’s here they foster new clients, enjoy old sights.
Here, they reserve a right and preference for coffee.
written 12 April 2016
Don’t let the last name fool you of Greene
As you continue to read, you will understand what made him structured lean
Mr. Greene was a man who won International Federation of Bodybuilders of MR. WORLD title twice
There were times when Mr. Greene called Joe Weider and asked for advice
It was intensity with the weights
Then taking in food protein and drinking protein shakes
Mr. Greene is a personal friend of mine
He used to tell me stories of bodybuilding ways
Also stay away from drugs and go astray
Yet he was every bodybuilder’s friend
But on the Bodybuilding stage, it was about the win
Mr. Greene’s muscles were his voice on stage
In the audience, it was the posing that did amaze
It left the audience and Judge’s in a daze
It was his proportion being the fine line
Then it was the repetitions that contributed being combined
Under the spotlight, Mr. Greene was the terminator
But it was his posing being the illustrator
Franklyn Greene was focused down to the finish
This is what makes him distinguished
A Bodybuilding champion who was meant to be
The world witnessed and was able to see
Mr. Greene made Bodybuilding everything that it should be
He is now retired from competition, but continues to train
Bodybuilding in his heart still remains
His motto, “Train with focus and eye on detail”
Franklyn Greene who did achieve and many bodybuilding awards he did receive. Accomplishments with many wins, and with a past being a milestone, but the name of Franklyn Greene who is still known.
We laughed so many times
Without even reason
You hugged me when I cried
Blandly called it “rainy season”
We were the closest friends
We might be together
Eternity has found it ends
We could deal with the weather
With the weather in our friendship
With the weather in our attention to each other
We were the same, now we’re another
Of course we’ve become older and more wise
I told you million times – “I’ll be by your side”
You're always in my heart even when we’re apart
We’ve got our history, our own life
I felt so much misery
When we twisted the knife
But thank you for being my former best friend
"The Prosecution "NOR" "The Defense", makes the accused come to court,and this is something I must "Report".The accused is not going to get a jail or prison sentence,and this is a fact that cannot go unmentioned. This trial shows "good intentions"! In this trial there will be no appeal,and there will be no one who will offer to make any kind of deal : I wonder if this "Trial" is really real? The "Trial" must go on,and cannot be dismissed,because "Democracy " Itself" was put "In Harms Way" on Jan 6 2021": The "Trial must go on to "Relieve the "Threat" that was made on "Democracy",and make that "Threat" known"to all Americans,and All Nations world wide who want "Democracy" in their "land"!! On Jan,6, 2021 something went "Wrong" and must not carry On in any "Democracy" so that "Democracy can remain "Strong"!!!! The "Trial of Donald J. Trump" is a "Public Display" that points to Jan 6,2021 when "Democracy in "The U.S.A. came "Undone" in front of "Everyone" under God's Sun!! The "Seat Of Democracy" wants to have this "Trial",even though no one will be sent to "Jail",or receive a "Prison sentence": Democracy "Might" some how be restored,after "Criminal" knocked down the "Democratic Doors"! The "Seat Of Democracy" "Was Put In Harms Way" ON Jan 6, 2021,and something "MUST" be done about that real true fact,and "Never Forgotten" if "Democracy wants to continue to "STAND".There are "Criminal Racist,White Supremacist,Black Supremacist,Yellow Supremacist,Brown Supremacist,Red Supremacist:God is "The Only Supreme Being"! Anti- Democracy is their plan. The real "ENEMY IS HATE". Hate will take all of those who practice it to "HELL"where they belong! Misery loves company,and when we are "Angry" we are not at all "Loving". When we are "Loving" we are not at all "Angry". The "Trial" of Donald John Trump must go on ,because on Jan 6,2021 something went "WRONG",and "Democracy Itself almost came "UNDONE"!!!!The Trial of Donald John Trump must go on,so that we can still "Write Money"and say:"IN GOD WE TRUST".We write these words on the money that we spend,and "NEVER" GLORIFY" ANY WOMEN OR ANY MEN"! It is a sin to glorify any women or any men! The saying "In God We Trust" "Unites Us All"!!!The Rich ,Poor, Middle Class,Weak, Strong,short,tall,and small!!!
Unlike you, I will not renounce
the passion of my youth,
now I am old and the fire burns low....
I do regret my sins, mostly of omission:
failing to tell of love, and sharing of love.
The women I've known could fill a ballroom.
Glad I am I danced with each in turn, yet
I wish I had held her tighter, lifted her higher,
giving joy to get joy....
If only I could love each of my loves again--
playing with her toes, caressing her calves,
sliding my hands along her tense, waiting thighs.
Then kissing the nape of her neck
while bathing in her hair and finally,
finally seeing the smile behind her eyes.