Best Flan Poems
Jam roly poly, treacle sponge
And sticky toffee pudding head the top of my list
But apple pie, rhubarb crumble
Or a decent cheesecake are hard to resist
Banana splits, eclairs or brownies
Dumplings, nougat, cheese board or mousse
Crème brûlée. Fruit cocktail. Yoghurt
Serve it up and set me loose!
Rice pudding, Christmas pudding
Let me say it loud and clear
Summer pudding, Eve's pudding
Figgy pudding - bring it here
Cottage pudding, Diplomat pudding
Pancakes served throughout the year
Plum pudding, mango pudding
Put it on a plate and cheer
Hasty pudding, Saxon pudding
Vanilla pudding, chocolate pud
Yorkshire pudding filled with treacle
Make winter evenings warm and good
Sussex Pond pudding, sweet biscotti
Semolina (if that counts?!)
Panna cotta, profiteroles
Gâteaux. Meringues in any amount
I guess spotted dick is a bit of a worry
But to bread and butter pudding, I say "bring it on!"
I could plan on a flan, or a lardy cake
Or butter with glee my scone or scon'
Mince pies, cobblers, baklavas, strudels
Loaves and pastries - all tell a story
Even blancmange has a heritage
To match or beat our knickerbocker glory
There's fruit tarts, jam tarts, custard tarts, egg tarts
Milk tarts, cheese tarts, butter tarts too
Tarts from Manchester, Liverpool and Bakewell
French tarts, Jamaican tarts - to name but a few
Buns from Chelsea, cakes from Eccles
Wafers and muffins from all over the place
Doughnuts filled with jam or chocolate
Made to squirt on your shoulder or face
Strawberries & Cream, Eton Mess
Artic rolls and brandy snaps
Trifles should always be trifled with
If laced with sherry - it's a perfect nightcap
Sorbets leave the palate tingling
Fritters fritter your cares away
Waffles and crêpes warm the spirit
And sundaes are perfect for every day
So, whatever we may call them -
Be it puddings, sweets, desserts or afters
They taste best when shared with company
Served with a spoon, a smile and laughter
Flan
The perfect dessert for me.
For it has the perfect texture , so consistent throughout.
It's gelatinous yet doughy body that is so sweet to the soul , tongue and mouth.
So beautiful and understating just like the perfect spouse.
But Pardon my manners If sometimes I wish to touch you with my hands and skip even using the spoon or fork.
Skip from I got to wait till you're done, to I can't wait to have some more.
Flan
Have had memories of you and I since back when grandmamma wasn’t so old,
and all I had to do was worry about what my abuelitos and parents told me.
When I finally saw you , suga it was like a dream come true.
Even if I was heavier than I should’ve been at 8 ,I would always take care of you.
And please listen to what I say because it’s only natural that as a former fat boy my words would also carry much weight.
Flan
There are so many types of you.
I've had the worst and the one's in between worse and in between.
But I've matured enough to expand my sense of taste and have acquired more than one sweet tooth.
But to only find out they don't even compare to you.
Flan
With your culinary curves it's almost as If I dishonored you with my failed homemade homages.
But can you blame my senses if I feel cozy around you?
Even though my comfort is only due to your confection,
you will always have my attention due to the enjoyment I feel in your presence,
For that I'' always say please and thank you.
Flan
With that cherry on top I just can't wait.
And I’ll see you, I’ll be picking you up at my abuelitas at eight.
I'll my bring my taste buds and you bring yourself.
But don't you worry about left over crumbs,
because I always clean my plate.
I knelt down covering the face with ground,
Romancing with hands spread
All over, exploring crevices, valleys
Undulating hills and mountains which spreadraggle.
His worshipful majesty blotting out of my turlips
In repeated recitation recalcitrant tongue,
Ageless ancestors do come together,
And let us broke on reason,
Plead case with the Almighty
Plead when prone to give in
Plead when on his Dinner spread,
Don’t offer chicken noodles and potato shuffle
But barbecue basted boasted Peacock, offer
Salami salmon salad in the sky
Roasted shark fins garnish with jellyfish
Add some coral reef to taste,
Dragon eyes buried in hot chili sauce;
Gut of Godzilla and chop chest of Plesiosaur
Mutton of Dinosaur and the baldhead of king Kong,
Breathing steam, sweet cherry on top,
All gather in a giant charger,
Let him not sip them down with Apricot flan,
Rousing rumbling champagne, bland brandy
But chestnut seed, olive and kernel oil
Sunripe grapes, camouflage lemons, rose of clematis,
Ceanothus, sunflower seeds and a sprinkle of cayenne
Let Hercules wringe together,
Let the violet juice drop to fill his goblet
And settle his heart.
attacking with achiote
burns with botanas
challenging us with chalupas
deluge of dulce
elotes by the ear
frightening flan
gouged with guacamole
heaping on the hongas
isla isolation
jugo huge jagged jugs
KKKKKKKKKK
langosta lunges
monumental mezcal
no count nopalitas
organized ostion
pummeling pepino
quivering quesadillas
rebelling relleno
sandia sword fights
tortured tamales
uvas uprising
venting vedura
war of the no "W" words
xnipec xanadu
yerbabuena yells
zanahoria zealots
There once was an ornament named Al
He loved to hang around with his pal.
To pick up a date
They often left late.
So the gals hung around fem fatale.
From a therapy tree they would listen.
Late Al never knew what he was missin’.
Bi-polar snow man,
Hit Rudolf with flan.
Santa gave Elf the new job of kissin’.
Christmas therapy session soon ended,
The old snowman outdoor remained frosted.
Santa ran out and squealed.
Now, I know I am real.
Snowballs flew through the air; boy exhausted.”
Al and pal alas came for their date.
The gals refused to go; it was late.
When laughter was found,
They all hung around.
Until the Christmas tree met its fate.
12/26/2016
There once was a man with a plan.
The man with the plan was named Stan.
Stan's plan as a man
was flan from a can
which he named Stan the Man's Canned Flan.
I treated this strange creature with great care
I knew she was not human, so unfair
She looked like my old cat before it died
Someone give her food, make sure it’s fried
She could not mew nor bark nor did she speak
I did not tell her that she was a freak
She liked to use her hair as a defence
Peering out as if in recompense
But if I’d cut it off, she would have screamed
As she watched the music fly in streams
She saw her visions and she talked to Lights
Noone human is vouchsafed such sights
But still I liked to gorge on her cheese flan
She might not act quite human but who can?
Share this:
I sat there staring at the screen
Thinking about lunch
Feeling very lean
I sat there still
Letters taunting me
Staring out the window sill
All I got was Nature staring back
Mocking me completely
I grew so slack
Haiku’s flashed through my head
So short and sweet
Frustrated, I went out to my shed
But narrative poetry that I must
Haiku’s so less sticky
My heads about to bust
Haiku’s I pressed on
The boss said otherwise
So much I think I might go eat a flan
Who’s this boss?
Master of school and more
Salad she did toss
She who is the bomb
Yet stern as a stone
She is known as my wonderful mom
What shall I ever do
Going through such misery
I shall go watch Winnie the pooh
Going to the big screen
I watched away
But I must return to my previous scene
Back at the small screen I ate a skittle
Procrastinating much
Thinking little
Finally arriving at the last
I think about Haiku’s
But I actually had a blast
In the yard I see our gnome
Standing there alone
Telling me to end my narrative poem
I love the egg custards, the apricot Danish,
And the warmed up apple dumpling.
And I especially love the creamy rolls,
Filled with that special something.
Do you like your apple crumble or,
Is your favourite coconut cream?
Is it the cherry crumb biscuit, lemon meringue,
Or a lemon supreme?
If you love indulging on all sorts of muffins,
The blueberry, carrot or bran,
And then dining on all the beautiful cakes,
If your favourite’s the Spanish flan.
Then I believe we should go on a date,
To the biggest bakery we can find.
We can have the greatest restaurant meal,
Leaving meat and three veg behind.
For customer services please now press one
for other assistance press two
we value your custom and thank you for waiting
you're currently held in a queue.
Thank you for holding, our agents are busy
they'll get to you as soon as they can,
in the meantime you can start to spring clean your house
or go bake a cake or a flan.
Thank you for holding (that's if you're still with us)
our agents will deal with your trouble,
please don't rub your chin on the telephone mouthpiece
you're starting to grow bits of stubble.
Thank you for holding and don't grind your teeth
please try and remain fairly calm,
We know that you're listening for the thirty-ninth time
to a piano concerto by Brahms.
Thank you for holding, our staff are still busy
but value the custom from you,
our call centre system's currently showing
you're now eighty-fifth in the queue.
Thank you for holding, the centre's now closed
our working day's nine until five,
please phone during these ours and our agents will help you-
assuming that you're still alive.
The rising of the seventh moon in an ornamental lampshade is equivalent to a nice round smiley dinner plate that had been recently washed,
Recently washed is neither a rotating wimpy wishing walker and neither is it a raspberry wafer wobbling,
It takes a lot of effort to squeeze a giant igloo through the eye of a needle,
And this is not pleasant for the spectating polar bears whose fish was being fried inside the dwelling holes,
But only a mini strawberry could flex the muscles effectively to cause a jam in a mile of traffic,
That is not good news for the jars who are already late and to be late is said to be as irrational as using a fork to make a morning brew,
A stew is far more intelligent than a gravy as many components equal more experience and more experience means that even a metric metre of labelled combinations could entice a bear from a sleeping hole,
But only when wearing a jacket made from paper,
It is nice and neat and true to form,
But format was often found to be a flame of frog leg on a carpet of mystical swirling frogspawn,
It is wise to offer up a little cup of cat milk to the buds then sit back as the colours loop in and swirl in a sky of answers,
But this can simply not be achieved nor archived when the moon is in the bin and the sailors are racing in the sun ship,
A trade is traditional and traditional trade can be nothing more then a hyper-fluted mini skirt of a skating rabbit on a promenade wearing 60 pairs of headphones,
Metronomes moaning making moronic motionless mixes,
And a nice little pair of glasses on the mantle-piece was swaying in the wind but not swearing for swearing was reserved for those who act out tanker talks,
Themes then?
Yes.
Where there were many now there are few.
But in fuse boxes the conversations are often quite absurd and who would put a floating camel in a tank then send it into a plane to cross the clouds,
Criss cross is a cleaning duty for a mission opinionated cloth wearing layers of clothing,
So what will one bring to the fair?
A mare
A single bud
A sanctified saint cushion with sparkles and satin.
And a heron in a pan of water with 60 fish to eat.
Consummation is the creational consumption cream of cropped chartered chunks. Said the 90 feet of cat by a door.
Z Leptailurus serval Z at 54 lemon sponge cakes laughing at 21 empty flan cases.
Valentine's Day is more special when you
Take your sweet out to eat at a romantic venue.
Add appeal to the meal,
And show him/her how you feel,
With a side dish not found on the menu:
With fajitas and flan
Say "te amo" to Juan;
Serve some "ich liebe dich"
With a schnitzel or fish;
"Aloha wau ia'oe"
Goes with roast pig and poi;
Sigh "je t'aime" if your man
Offers you coq au vin;
If lo mein's what she wishes,
Say "wo ai ni" to your missus;
"Naku penda" suffices
For most okras and rices;
"Aie imasu" to Lucy
As you're sharing some sushi;
Put "ikh hob dikh lib" in a box
With some bagels and lox;
"Ayor anosh' ni" won't sound quirky
With hoecakes and jerky;
Shout "ti amo" with gusto
As you serve antipasto;
"Mi amas vin" you'll emote
Over barbequed goat;
With a nice spicy curry
Try "mea tum se pyaar karta hu" in a hurry,
Though there's no guarantee it will work.
No, it's not a sure bet,
So don't get upset,
And don't fret if you start to feel tinglish.
If everything fails,
Don't start chewing your nails,
Just say, "Darling, I love you,"
In English.
Author's note: The "cuisines d'amour" mentioned in this piece are as follows: 1. Spanish 2. German 3. Hawaiian 4. French 5. Mandarin 6. Swahili 7. Japanese 8. Yiddish 9. Navajo 10. Italian 11. Esperanto 12. Urdu.
Pronunciation is at the reader's own peril…
on
the menu
crabs
clam
alfalfa
salad
lasagna
pasta
salsa
with
tramasalata:
carp
sprats
&prawns
parma ham
jam
tarts
and
banana
flan
When I Am Feeling Sad
When the bills come. When bad news breaks. When I’m feeling sad.
I simply start eating my favorite things. And then I don’t feel so bad.
I eat cheesecake and some doughnuts. Next its time for flan.
Peanut butter cookies, hot fudge sundae with whipped cream.
I eat many things.
When my heart aches. When I’m lonely. When I’m feeling down.
I sometimes start drinking my favorite things. And then I don’t feel so bad.
I drink: milk shakes. Diet coke float. Ginger with eggnog.
If still feeling sadly, I sit down and eat: a half-gallon of mint ice cream.
I eat chocolates, some with cashews, almonds or pecans.
If that doesn’t do it, I just eat more things until I don’t feel sad.
Calorie counting and meal planning do not seem to help!
My exercise buddy just threw in the towel. So, now I’m feeling sad.
It’s time to start eating my favorite things; I hope I won’t feel bad.
© Dane Smith-Johnsen
February 27, 2010
Poetic form: Narrative
John had a motorcycle crash four years back,
And lost partial use of his legs and right arm,
But found inspiration in Stutzman, not an arm,
At the London Paralympics, to top the rack.
“I watched the…Paralympics and saw Matt,
…so I thought if he can shoot with no arms,
I must be able to shoot [fine] with my arms,
And that’s where it started, [where I’m at].”
He shoots a compound and is righthanded,
He loves heavy rock and The Last Samurai,
He revels in the challenge of the ground, lie,
And he’s competitive and diligent minded.
He broke four world records, two European,
Gained a mixed team gold at the Worlds 2015,
And in the individual the silver he did glean,
Then at the Euros in 2016 he baked a gold flan.