Best Dudley Poems

There once was a dude named Dudley
By all accounts he was quite ugly
As hard as he tried
He put makeup on his eyes
He still wasn't sweet...

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Please forget me.
Please move on.
Don't remember me
when you've gone.

Loose my number.
Loose my Address.
You walked her way
you know the rest.

Now you are gone
and I am free.
Now...

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"Not everyone who drinks is a poet ... some of us drink because we're NOT poets" -  Dudley Moore, "Arthur"



Not all poets are lonely...

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Lecherous Luther was wont to grope
He ceased to function at the end of a rope!

Here lies Cletus as stiff as a board
He slipped on the...

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The Great Bell of Bow

I feel such a Steam Tug and no Porkies
Some Tea Leaf Half Inched me Jam jar

In me local Nuclear Sub you...

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Here I am facing my death at age sixteen.
Each moment of my life has been a foreboding scene.
I never had desire to be this nation’s...

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The augury of him in Crimea was so
That Ekaterina said she was tired of sandwiches
But I did have black tea, black Latvian bread with her...

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Having a shower is relaxing, water gently falling,
Soothing your naked body, but I nearly went sprawling,
I was staying with Ricky and Robyn his wife,
When an...

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The Great Bell of Bow

I feel such a Steam Tug and no Porkies
Some Tea Leaf Half Inched me Jam jar

In me local Nuclear Sub you...

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She was a jolly woman in her prime, a beauty
And she had a crush on the man who made her laugh
So thus enamored, she asked...

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In a short time, you will be my executioner.
Your actions shall be considered a favor.
You say to me “Lady, please forgive me”.
I, Mary Stuart, am...

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MY HUSBAND TALKS TO ANIMALS

My husband talks to animals.
With squirrels he has conversations
and blue jays often counsels.

With squirrels he has conversations
concerning the garden and digging;
to...

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be on the lookout
for those who are curious about your personal affairs
at the workplace
be on the lookout for those who are always hanging around you...

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BORN ANEW
When Spring comes again
not the warmth..nor the rain
not the yellow ..nor the green
not the grass or verdant scene;
not the winds or blossom bright
not the...

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Madly Iridescent
By Rick Rucker

My wife had told me about her boss,
That, to not meet her, would be my loss,

I stopped by to see my Honey,
Something...

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