Best Dud Poems

...At the footbridge Sue was meeting her beau
(He was married to a woman called Flo)
Sue soon found out his deception
She dismembered his ********
For his love life it was a massive blow......

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...
6 years ago, I wrote limericks about 5 PS poets. Today, I've posted
about another 5 and will continue to add more...  before 6 years.

I tickled funny bones of five Souper men
So, I gave though......

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...Mom caught her boob in the washer’s wringer
Rotor made Mom an opera singer
    Tit for tat, she got redder
     Pop struggled with the lever
I pulled the plug, was able to spring ‘er

Wow!  Mum is th......

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...(after Edgar Allan Poe's "The Angel of the Odd")

It was a tidy day and I sat, replete, under vellux blankets.
Sadly, my tea was weak, the bottle of cinnamon whiskey
tantalizingly low, and my feet sw......

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...I hated homework - what a bore;
And wanted time to play.
I’d tolerate that stuff at school,
But that was during day.

We didn’t have a dog or cat,
But Teacher didn’t know:
Those creatures chew......

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...Violinist

Of all human evils
That happend in history
Bigger than Holocaust
It was not, and it will not be.

One Violinist was there
His life was violin string
He made the bloody nest there
......

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...Original limerick  written by Jan Allison


A petite ballerina named Tina
Seemed serene but she couldn’t be meaner
When she got in the sack 
She was on the attack
At the size and t......

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...maudlin

maudlin Monday's mostly mud
halts the weekend with woeful thud
laughs and sillies
get the willies
on maudlin Monday, what a dud

tintinnabulous

tintinnabulous Tuesday
is the seco......

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...8/27/18
"Big"



You're a puppy, I'm a big dog
You're a guppy, I'm a big cod
You're a tadpole, I'm a big frog,
You're a piglet, I'm a big hog
You're a shrimp, I'm a big prawn
You're a baby,......

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...Me: Say Charlotte, is your story true?
C: It’s fictional, now are we through?

Me: So are you rich from telling yarns?
C: I’ve got nice threads, but live in barns.

Me: Are you a speedster in d......

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...We all need a Savior
In this world today
Because to enter Heaven
There is no other way.

So a Savior God did send
Jesus His own Son
For He is salvation's gift,
Gift for every one.

So why d......

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...To put an end to the myth that Santa lives in Lapland

Santa is a Yorkshire man everybody knows that
People just say he's from Lapland, cos he’s round and fat.
Well Yorkshire men can be the same they......

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...To stop the myth going around that Santa is a Scotsman, a huge hit on the radio here. So fo those that believe this is the truth.


Santa is a Yorkshire man everybody knows that
You just say he is Sc......

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...Roger was an humble man, 
who dreamed of being a stud; 
for when it came to pleasure, 
poor Roger was a dud! 

He created a little tool, 
powered by electricity; 
guaranteed for pleasure, 
a ......

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...So bridge to bridge, of other things speaking
Of which my comedy does not take care,
We walked; and reached the top, when seeking
For watching the next slit, then we stopped there
Malebolge to se......

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