Best Calamity Jane Poems

She makes the whip go poppin’, 
Her pistol shots are heart stoppin’, 
Woman of romance, grit and fame, 
Wild Lady of Heart, Calamity Jane. 
...

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Calamity Jane the adventuress,
Lived and died hard under stress.
She could drink, smoke and shoot,
Out rode most galoots,
Men had to admit she's the best.

Calamity had a...

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Donald Duck Chancellor of this fowl kingdom 
wearing an upside down smile's raging hypocrite backwards 
this deranged Duck twitters to and fro as his unhinged...

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Donald Duck Chancellor of this fowl kingdom 
wearing an upside down smile's raging hypocrite backwards 
this deranged Duck twitters to and fro as his unhinged...

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This poem was written after I took a tour of the Little Bighorn Battlefield National Monument in Wyoming, the site of Custer's Last Stand.

It was...

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"The 50 Move Rule"



Thomas Crown 
rolled his smile 
around her frown

Romance blew a warm breath
over her pristine cowrie shell
Voodoo Mojo Bag

There, 
just there, 
an Ocean...

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Geese, Goslings and the Bridge

Sometimes, when you least expect it, Mother Nature makes a u-turn and draws you into the ridiculous.  Such was the...

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Buffalo Bill

Stood in the rain and caught a chill

Was very ill and in some pain

He moaned and groaned…"This is a calamity, Jane!!"...

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Star crossed champions of mirth
Wild hair and wild eyes, both 
To the world they say with arms raised to the sky, 
"What a pity, for...

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Eighteen hundred and three begins U.S. destinies.
Merriwether Lewis and his comrade, William Clark, agrees –
They will go forth, avoid Frenchmen, fighting growling grizzlies.
To find a...

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Riding the quarter slot pony
at Woolworth’s five & dime
Would send this half pint cowgirl
back to another time

I was Calamity Jane riding hell bent
to bring the...

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The Ballad of Cat Ballou (Continued) 
 
With her outlaw gang they're now telling a story of how she rode the plains.
The wildest gal in...

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*original poem follows the Dramatic Monologue

Dramatic Monologue by a Coldcocked Husband

Yes, you know my wife is nuts,
no ifs, but oh her butt.
Mercilessly, I fell hard
for...

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The weekend is here again
And if I have my way
I'm going to spend my spare time
Watching films starring Doris Day

In nineteen forty nine
Ten years before...

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 Is It Deplorable
And Does It make me Criminal?
If I used my Genius
To become Felinous
As I was craving to become your Ethos

All that I Did
Was...

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