It was Betty and Veronica
who asked Archie to play the harmonica
turned out the sound was so bad
that they rushed to replace him with grandad
This is the saga of Veronica Vole
Who committed the perfect crime.
She murdered three lovers,
But not all at once,
She did 'em in one at a time.
The first was a lemur,
A two-timing schemer,
Who seduced all thirteen of her nieces.
Every female enticed him,
So she sliced him and diced him,
Then stir-fried and ate all the pieces.
The second, a lobster,
Was also a mobster
Who threatened her once with a putter.
So she got him alone,
Then boiled him well done,
And had him for lunch with drawn butter.
The third was a vulture,
Devoid of all culture,
Whose name, she remembers, was Vince.
He was planning to eat her
After he bet her,
So she tased him in self-defense.
In a big pot she tucked him,
Then scalded and plucked him
And served him "en casserole"
To her fourth beau, a critter,
Who'll make a good fritter,
She thinks as she spoons out his food.
'cause though she doesn't tend
To have good taste in men,
She does tend to like men who taste good.
Ms. Vole is not a siren or a femme fatale,
The kind of dame who'd tell a guy to take a hike.
At heart she is simply a sweet-natured gal
Who never met a man she didn't like.
Archie did cartwheels for Veronica
Jughead even played his harmonica ~
But Veronica’s Jewish
Leaving two suitors bluish ~
Steinberg made her latkes for Chanukah
_________________________________
'Latkes' are potato pancakes, a traditional
Chanukah treat.
Why did Archie keep running after Veronica?
Betty was the nice one.
And she was blonde.
Why was Reggie’s mouth always drawn into a sneer?
Did they want him to look cruel?
Why did they want Jughead to appear stupid?
Oddly enough, I never questioned why
Betty and Veronica were both drawn like Vargus pinup girls.
Maybe because I was used to Barbie dolls in 1959.
Archie Andrews
Lots of girls from whom to choose,
But one young lady caught his eye
For her he could be the lucky guy.
Veronica Lodge
Would never our Archie dodge
She was always his girlfriend
From the beginning to the end.
FIRST PLACE WINNER
written August 29, 2021
for "Cleritoons" Poetry Contest
sponsored by Joseph May
I was sitting a the edge of the bar
thinking of my new car.
I saw her
she asked me to dance
I loved her at first glance.
She told me her was Veronica.
Veronica
every day is Christmas
and every day Hanukkah
with my Veronica.
Every day is Christmas
and every day is Hanukkah
with my Veronica.
She let me sleep at night
and always treated me right.
She loved my pride
and worshipped my ride.
Veronica
every day is Christmas
and every day is Hanukkah
with my Veronica.
Every day is Christmas
and every day is Hanukkah
with my Veronica.
Saturday night
singing with the band
Veronica holding my left hand.
People say to her how can you stand that man.
One day it was snowing
and I heard something blowing
my Veronica played the harmonica.
Veronica
played the harmonica.
Veronica
played the harmonica.
Oh Veronica.
every day is Christmas
and everyday is Hanukkah
with my Veronica.
Every day is Christmas
and everyday is Hanukkah
with my Veronica.
Keep playing that Harmonica.
Veronica!
Very vivacious and vibrant
Elegant and eloquent as ever
Radiant as the spring sun
Overall, amazing and odd in a good way I must say
Never fails to amaze me...allow me to smile in sunlit glee
Invigorating and intriguing always and forever
Change is a challenging chore, but nothing is impossible with Veronica, abiding by your side
A wonderful family friend - subside from her side, negativity of the night and let the light be her emerald compass of delight...now, everything is black and white when she plays a rad rhythm on the drums so tight, reminding us that everything's alright , so don't lose sight, sing joyously, and bodyquake with your might
Veronica, Veronica
Valerie, Valerie
oh! blond hair and perky breasts
tan legs and hot lips
when oh when will you be mine
not my girlfriend
no you're not that kind
but I have a use for you
and though it's a shame
after all I'm only a man
who can I be to blame
your soft skin and that sweet look
drive me crazy
and soon my sweet girls
for at least one night
both of you can be mine
Central Park has grizzly bears
(Don’t worry – in the zoo)
Residing in the habitat
The polar bear once knew.
While visiting the park today
I saw them in their lair;
With one asleep and one stretched out,
They didn’t seem to care.
Their given names, to comic buffs,
Will bring a little smile,
As Betty and Veronica
Explore their domicile.
It’s nice to know the animals
By name, but there’s one hitch –
We’d need an Archie bear as well
To tell us which is which.
Somewhere in the hills o'er yonder
My hear beats louder than the thunder
And day and night it roams and wonder
Why did we begin to fall assunder.
Sometimes when the moon is bright. I
Press her to my lips in prayer
For we must dance again before we die
While moon drenched nights can hunger.
I was committed here, and you still there
We could not tear the wind from the tree.
But sometimes come now and idle tear
And sometimes grow a stalk of memory.
Somewhere in the hills o'er yonder
My heart beats louder than the thunder
Do remember me, Veronica, do you remember
I was dry banana leaf in your ember.
Veronica
You have a way that pulls on gram-as heart strings
Bringing me so much joy and pleasure
For it is you that makes gram-as heart sing
Your gram-as little treasure
You bring a smile in little things you say
Or a laugh in little things you do
Your the sunshine that lights my day
Your the rainbow in it to
You have away of melting my heart so sweet and fragile
Veronica my sweet granddaughter your the reason gram-as smiles
You are old I am young
You have love I have none.
"Look. Look at those flocks of birds emigrating south!
They’re escaping with regular wing beats, crying farewell."
Tomorrow would be a good day to die
Today a good tomorrow
Dying must be strange, nonsense life is strange
We wait for nothing yet nothing will come
I never hoped you would accept an invitation to my farewell party
We wait for nothing yet nothing will come
Yes, like Fassbinder
Yes, like Veronica Voss
I owe my soul to the company store
Finishing Line Press. Book FAREWELL TO THE DUST, by C. S. Leaf avalible March 2008
www.FinishingLinePress.com