Toilet Roll Poems - Poems about Toilet Roll

... Life is like a toilet roll ~when it's half way it finishes faster......Read the rest...

... An Introduction to Max Hi, I am a Mastiff cross and my name is Magical Max. To be precise it’s actually Magical Maxi the Wonder Dog but you can call me Max. That’s not to say I possess ma......Read the rest...

...Whilst pensive and serene and seated on the loo contentedly having my morning number two my serenity was shaken torn asunder by a massive mistake a terrible blunder someone had installed ......Read the rest...

...My mother was talking to her friend and I was drawing fruit on an Izal toilet roll. Only because we didn’t have any writing paper and Izal because it was the cheapest Unfortunately it was shiny and......Read the rest...

...boxful of Scotland souvenirs at a car boot sale a life’s possessions in thirty or so boxes from the back of a white Transit knick-knacks from Scotland a wee man with ginger hair tam o’shant......Read the rest...

...The clocks go back on Sunday. Don't forget! Another hour in bed for those that sleep For those that don't, another hour to keep On thinking of the things that we regret Time rumbles on. We fumble......Read the rest...

...I’ve picked at it, tore at it Pulled it with my teeth My mouth filled up with nibbled bits Which gave me loads of grief I had to rinse and gargle With diluted chlorine bleach Every time its ......Read the rest...

...A troll followed me home one day, Looking to bring me down. I told it I didn’t want to play, To go dig a great deep hole, Roll its little soul into the black hole. It didn't matter where I went ......Read the rest...

...The smallest room in the house, Phew what a smell, It smells so bad, It's my lads, Replace toilet roll, End of the day it's used, Do they eat it????? It's my lads, Hairs fill the plughole......Read the rest...

...No comes quickly to my lips underneath the wave of lies truth drowns and loses grip Off the end I remember before the memory formed If i could give a i wouldn't Toilet roll telescopes Shinni......Read the rest...

...Some guys sprinkle when they have a tinkle and spurt wee wee all over the floor Then they leave the lavatory seat up these two actions I simply abhor! The ladies sit down on the toi......Read the rest...

...Two metres apart Is where we start Then self-isolate Before it’s too late Wash your hands Else virus expands Using PPE Helps safety Society shut We all stay put Food shops empty Used to be......Read the rest...

...GONE VIRAL (For Corona virus/ Covid 19 contest) Don’t splutter, don’t wheeze Don’t cough and don’t sneeze Or they’ll lock you up And they’ll mislay the keys Don’t tell them you’re hot Jus......Read the rest...

...With the world in lockdown What is left to do ? But log onto soup And write about it It's a sorry state of affairs In solitary confinement Such as doing simple math to while the ......Read the rest...

...COVID-19 They christened her Corona, and not to be dismissed The blight that made the planet, get its knickers in a twist They closed the universities, and then they closed the schools The world......Read the rest...