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MY PET HATES - LAVATORY HUMOUR

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Some guys sprinkle when they have a tinkle and spurt wee wee all over the floor Then they leave the lavatory seat up these two actions I simply abhor! The ladies sit down on the toilet when they are in need of the loo But they always take ages to finish it’s no wonder there's often a queue! But my biggest bug bear when I'm sitting is that there is no darn toilet roll I have to fumble about for a tissue so I can wipe my dirty butt hole! LAST VERSE INSPIRED BY GOING TO A VENUE WHICH HAD WALL MOUNTED DISPENSERS ... FOUR OF THEM IT WAS IMPOSSIBLE TO GET THE PAPER OUT OF .... ARGH, THANKFULLY I ALWAYS CARRY TISSUE IN MY BAG 08/14/20

Copyright © | Year Posted 2020




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Date: 8/19/2020 6:35:00 PM
Hi Jan, We love potty humor here, nothing is beneath us. This is a hilarious write on a frustrating subject. Smiles & Hugs :)))
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JAN ALLISON
Date: 8/19/2020 11:40:00 PM
lol Regina, not everyone is a fan of my 'toilet humour' I got told in my early days that 'scatlogoy is not a subject poets should write about - but I will never stop - I write about poop... some folk are just full of it lol:-) hugs jan xx
Date: 8/18/2020 2:03:00 PM
Considering I fall in the 'men' category I can assure you that I am fussy about using loos, and I hate public ones!! Thanks for the laugh Jan:) Hugs // paul
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JAN ALLISON
Date: 8/18/2020 2:50:00 PM
I don't like using public loos unless absolutely necessary lol:-0 hugs jan xx
Date: 8/16/2020 1:34:00 PM
I think anyone would hate that - I would! Made me pee with joy :)
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JAN ALLISON
Date: 8/18/2020 2:50:00 PM
ha ha ha thanks Michelle:-) hugs jan xx
Date: 8/16/2020 12:55:00 PM
:) You gave me quite a laugh, Jan! So glad you brought the tissue. I think we've all experienced this. Hugs, Carolyn
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JAN ALLISON
Date: 8/18/2020 2:48:00 PM
there is a little poetic licence of course lol:-) hugs Jan xx
Date: 8/16/2020 10:31:00 AM
Ha ha, love it Jan, you made me smile and belly laugh! Hugs :)
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JAN ALLISON
Date: 8/18/2020 2:46:00 PM
Thanks Tania:-) hugs Jan xx
Date: 8/15/2020 4:36:00 PM
Hello Jan ... the trick is Jan, for men; have a fly stuck low down in the bowl. They never miss trying to remove the fly, and why don't ladies put the seat up for us men - thanks again Jan - Lindsay
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JAN ALLISON
Date: 8/15/2020 4:38:00 PM
ha ha ha so that is why blokes have flies in their trousers - and no way am i lifting the seat lol:-) hugs Jan xx
Date: 8/15/2020 12:56:00 PM
Nice write! In the men's, the toilet paper is usually found all over the floor. I think mothers should assign their sons to the toilet cleaning chore as the smell should convince them that is no way to treat their mother! Aloha! Rico
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JAN ALLISON
Date: 8/15/2020 1:48:00 PM
thanks Rico:-) I have to say it is not often I have frequented men's toilets lol:-) hugs jan xx
Date: 8/15/2020 4:57:00 AM
DUCK! TOILET DUCK! LOL. I’ll leave the typo there for your amusement.
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JAN ALLISON
Date: 8/15/2020 11:40:00 AM
I am crying with laughter thanks Nina:-) I wanted to use asshole at the end but it would have got starred lol:-) hugs jan xx
Date: 8/15/2020 4:56:00 AM
Well what an ending to leave us with! Haha! Here’s another pet hate. How many of us live with people who know where the little bits are on the outside of the loo that collect stray boy-pee? Or even know that that is a thing? Grrr. I’m sure some people think that squirting the toilet dick round counts as cleaning... in fact I know they do! Rant over! Anyway, I neede something silly today so thanks!
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JAN ALLISON
Date: 8/15/2020 11:39:00 AM
OMG @ toilet dick ha ha ha:-) so glad I made you smile and you certainly made me laugh:-) hugs jan xx
Date: 8/14/2020 4:55:00 PM
great one, jan! my pet peeve in a public toilet is the lack of a hook on which to hang my bag. so often they are missing and it drives me nuts!
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JAN ALLISON
Date: 8/14/2020 5:19:00 PM
I agree with your Ilene it's irritating but think I can do without the hook... i can;t do without loo roll lol:-) hugs jan xx
Date: 8/14/2020 2:59:00 PM
Hi Jan cannot beat a fine piece of toilet humor, had a great laugh at this one I try use the urinals myself or lift the seat but your probably right I forget to put it back down, typical man cheers David, damn them tight dispensers.
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JAN ALLISON
Date: 8/14/2020 3:13:00 PM
the 'tight' dispensers with the tiny hole that the paper pokes out of drives me mad... more often than not the person before left it so no paper pokes out ...now I always check before I sit down lol:-) hugs Jan xx