Slob Poems - Poems about Slob

I am a slob today

slob
unkempt
slovenly
my hair is weird
my face is dirty
my teeth are quite smelly
my underarms are screaming
I am a total wreck mama
I have worn this nightshirt for three days
there is a wood tick buried in my arm

Categories: slob, me,
Form: Free verse

The Slob Who Won'T Get a Job

Some call him lazy and his wife calls him a jerk.
His wife is very angry because he will not work.
He won't get a job even though he's an able-bodied man.
Her husband refuses to get a job even though he can.
His wife is getting sick and tired of having to support him and their four kids.
She'd

Categories: slob, humor, husband, jobs, money,
Form: Rhyme

Bob the Slob

There was once a lazy drunkard named Bob
He's so idle he's nicknamed the fat slob
By the pool he lays
In a drunken daze
He just drinks and shovells food down his gob.

In the summers heat Bob sweated and stunk
Didnt bother him cos he was so drunk
Tripped over a stool
Fell into the pool
And now smells more like wet

Categories: slob, humor,
Form: Limerick

Book: Radiant Verses: A Journey Through Inspiring Poetry

I Am a Sloth a Slob a Slug

I am a sloth, a slob, a slug
During the summer when school is out.
I move in slow motion from chair to couch to bed.

I am in the throes of binge eating –
sugar, sugar, sugar, sugar, sugar and salt.
pie, cake, cinnamon rolls, pie, cake and chips.

I am sluggish.
I have gained eight pounds in the eight pounds

Categories: slob, humor, summer,
Form: Free verse

Farewell, You Slob

Goodbye our very good best friend, we hate to see you go
We hope that you remember us and visit us below
And maybe you'll drop by to say how much you miss us so
That's when we'll call Security in case you want to know

We hear you have the most rad office on the fourth floor high
You're

Categories: slob, farewell, friendship, goodbye, humor,
Form: Rhyme

A Food Slob

She savored her delicious red eye gravy
Slurping it up while she was in the navy.
Most of us were truly uniquely impressed.
At how her stomach was adequately dressed.
The fabulous bib that she wore at her neck,
Was beauty-wonderful in every respect.
We followed her around this little tiny town.
Slurping ample bits of gravy off of the ground.
With a

Categories: slob, food,
Form: Rhyme

Corncobs

As a young boy named Bob
I was a bit of a slob
As I did my sweet chewing job
With typewriter teeth cleaning corncobs.

Many years have flown past.
I have grown old at last,
But dentures don’t force me to fast.
New typewriter teeth are having a blast.

Date:10/19/2019
Picture 3

Categories: slob, art, boy, food, humor,
Form: Rhyme

Married To the Slob


I don’t run with the mob ... 
the mosh-pit, gossip crowd
End of message     Stop!
Just wanna hip you to this fact,
right off the top

I’m a clean living woman,
the mop-and-pail type gal

I know how to swing a mean vocal mop,
don’t need no lip help to knuckle swab
I can empty my own pity-pot bucket,
these

Categories: slob, humorous, imagery, love, marriage,
Form: Light Verse

A Sentimental Slob

The way to a man's heart is through his heart
Contrary to how the old saying goes
After all my years this is what I've discovered
It's an axiom most people don't know

The “through his belly” quote wasn't accurate
As far as this old guy's concerned
If you could know me now you'd know for sure
The name “sentimental slob” is

Categories: slob, emotions,
Form: Narrative

Door Knob a Fat Slob

Door Knob A Fat Slob

Of sense Trump only has a small dob,
Who was discovered to be a door nob;
A dumb  cluck;
Foot got stuck;
Difficult entering and sure is fat slob.

Jim Horn

Categories: slob, allegory, analogy,
Form: Limerick

A Slob of the First Order

He never closes a door, or a drawer.
Dirty socks, candy wrappers,
abandoned on the floor.
Tools, left lying where he used them.

Muddy footprints, 
leading into the kitchen.
Crumbs everywhere 
on floors, tables, chairs-
leavings of a snackaholic.

But he has a heart as big as Texas.
When trouble comes,
he's in my corner.

He carries the groceries
and massages my aching back.

Even after fifty

Categories: slob, husband, love, marriage,
Form: Free verse

Sentimental Slob

The way to a man's heart is through his heart
Contrary to how the old saying goes
After all my years this is what I've discovered
It's an axiom most people don't know

The “through his belly” quote wasn't accurate
As far as this old guy's concerned
If you could know me now you'd know for sure
The name “sentimental slob” is

Categories: slob, love,
Form: Quatrain

**** Retentive Meets Slob

I'm as un-**** retentive as one can be
My wife's at the other end of the dial
Makes for interesting discussions at times
They sometimes last quite a while

Opposites attract, they say it's true
In our case it surely illustrates that fact
Must show restraint every damn day
For the sake of the dog and the cat

Dishwashers get loaded a certain

Categories: slob, marriage,
Form: Quatrain