Shrew Poems | Examples

Married to a Shrew

He crawled out of the doghouse looking sad
His new wife was mean, big and bad
I had been warned, he said, by my dad
He had also married a shrew, big and bad

Reign of the Shrew

I sneaked in the house late last night
Couldn't risk turning on the light
Tripped over a chair and took flight
I felt the smite        I felt the smite

A bruise appeared upon my thigh
Although from drinking, I was high
Without having an alibi
I'd have to lie     I'd have to lie

I tried to keep my self-esteem
Covered it with expensive cream
But touching the spot made me scream
A faulty scheme     A faulty scheme

Wife heard and asked, "What happened here?"
I said, "Sorry to wake you, dear."
She didn't believe me, I fear
I smelled of beer    I smelled of beer

My suff'ring was not convincing
She used curse words without mincing
When washing dishes and rinsing
I am wincing          I am wincing

I'll never pull that stunt again
Wife threatened me with ball and chain
Inside our house, the shrew does reign
She is insane       She is insane

Do I Need To Write a Thank You Note

Samantha my cat brought me a present.
It really wasn't all that pleasant.
She brought it into my sun room door
and left it there on the floor..
I'm finally recognizing her gifting growl.
It's much more dramatic than a mere meow..
Now I'm wondering just what to do.
Does she need a thank you note for her dead shrew?

Wicked Shrew

The truth I can reveal
There’s a  inside of me
One I hope you will never see
I’d hide it away
Forever and a day
If I had my way

I can be petty and mean
Yell, swear and scream
Be unreasonable
Unrelenting
Never thinking
I might be wrong

Oh no instead
My position I will always defend
Sometimes until the bitter end

This may be more
Than you bargained for
Or are willing to contend

So hear these words
I will be different
My new heart grew

So kill the wicked shrew
Who ruled before
I met you

The Cunning Shrew

The cunning shrew
Her bow drew -- Why?
Bull's eye!  O, my!

Tiny Shrew

He's tiny
 barely one inch long,
 stubby tail
 too short to grab or hold.
Glossy black ebony fur
 so thick and full
 reflected in the rays of sun
 too brief to be seen.
He's fast and quick 
 slithering between the stones
 appearing in the hidden crevices
 then gone.
The seeds are set
 clustered in a dish
 prepped for bird, squirrel or chipmunk
 but from the earth below he rises.
Rippled fur to find a place
 taking seed hurriedly
 just one or two
 then disappears.
Beneath the stones somewhere
 below the piled branches
 in between the scattered leaved
 he slips into a burrowed home.
There lies piles of sequestered seed
 stored dry, ready and safe
 for the cold winter ahead
 the stockpile haven
 of a tiny shrew.

The Shrew

The feisty woman spewed torrential abuses
He holds her in his arms till her anger defuses  
To despair over her phobias he  simply refuses

Nightmares of being hated and unloved one day
Cloud her thoughts of his fearful avenge in some way
His calming voice cannot unnerve her in her usual fray

One such day his heart-beat stops as he lay stony still
A cold stare at her tongue that could no more bring him ill
Sobbing apologies echoed after her poisonous verbal pill

In his matrimonial life his patience had passed every test 
Gloom spread as the dead lay on the pyre after his cardiac arrest
Such pretence was unseen as she hammered hard on his breast 

Her beatings opened the flood gates of his arteries and he sat up affrighted
His son's eyes ogled out and hands quivered holding the torch that was lighted 
Shrieks and rampage confused the reborn while at his back the shrew snorted


October 16, 2016
Contest No. 224
For Brain Strand

The Untamable Shrew

(This is meant as sort of a counterpoint to all the mushy sentiment of "Valentine Day.")

The Untamable Shrew

By Elton Camp

It’s ever harsh words and criticize
Always excused by endless lies

All he says and does is wrong
Every day the same old song

With outrage, she will say
“Why do YOU do this way!”

For him, it’s to be expected
Every word will be corrected

All decisions are her domain
His views, she will disdain

Whether a matter great or small
She has her way, on them all 

Half a sentence he may get out
Before she interrupts with a shout

Daily misery is to be his life
Filled with unending strife

Taming of the Shrew

Before mankind evolved on Earth
or mammals roamed the land
t’was only bugs and dinosaurs
that God had ever planned.

But monkeying around one day
he thought he’d have some fun
and made a man to pass his time,
thus mankind had begun.

But boredom overtook him
nothing changed within his land
so he thought I’ll make a creature
that I cannot understand.

That way I’ll be surprised each day
by how this creature plays
and my boredom will be over
and bring interest to my days.

He named this creature women
but he didn’t get it right
he forgot to give her reasons
why she wasn’t always right.

So God or Man or creatures
could not ever prove her wrong
and now universal language
shares in woman’s nagging tongue.

Its not that I’m complaining
cause it would be just in vain
and anyhow my ear holes
really couldn’t stand the pain.

But my God if you could ever
see your way to tame the shrew
then I’m sure that man would turn from her
and start to worship you!

Ivor G Davies

To Tame a Shrew

TO TAME A SHREW


Tunke Tunke Tunke
I dragged her along and into the trunk
Clunk clunk clunk, 
I hear some screaming from the Tunke

I drove away, in my brand new Lex
Avoiding both grammar and spelling checks
Safely away, I saved the day
Off I am to the road by the bay

Tunke Tunke Tunke
Her crass verse I too stuffed in the trunk
Drunk drunk drunk
How else does one explain a skunk in the trunk?

So by the bay, I opened me trunk
Someone is gonna be going for a dunk
I unloaded the cargo chapter and verse
At the bottom of the lake let’s see her converse

Theshe,The Shrew

Sinew torqued and bowed as he pressed the weight
Of drudge claimed goods to be stacked and stowed.
The lady claimed that his omnipresent proclivities
Would neither build strength of character nor stature.
Laugh, she did, as she  knew the wolverine has left the den,
To  build his muscle with more willing obstructions.
The starving dog follows the master who feeds him:
And she, the mistress, always leaves flesh on the bone

Shrewdness of the Shrew

The shrewdness of the shrew
Out of place on her
Would better be placed 
Upon a gentle woman
Of genteel character

This shrew of a woman
Abused by a man in her childhood
Angry all the time
Doesn't even know why herself
The only thing she knows 
Is she is angry at this man




In the process of thought.....

The Taming of the Shrew

Balderdash, that's what it is
Balderdash. For shrews are untamable
except in movies.

Silly Shrew

Tiny, insignificant little shrew
Spinning lies which you spew
The rubber walls are calling you
Marbles left, you have but few

Shrew

pettifogging shrew

                                     mad landlady glares at you

                                              your rent overdue

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