Short Snotty Poems

Luciano Pavarotti
sang for the posh and snotty
how his songs proved mighty popular
that old fat tum of the Opera...

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In this poem-request, I hope I don't sound overly pushy or snotty :-)
But I pray more Depends can be donated so old people can go potty!...

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There was a man so debonair
That he held his nose high in the air.

When he tripped in a pool
And looked like a fool,

He said: "I really jumped in on a dare."...

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Construction worker Fred, never snotty
Boastful, self-righteous, or slightly haughty
   They laid him to rest
   Midst tribute the best
Gold-plated, silver-edged Porta-Potty...

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Wildlife 50 

A salty sea-lion called Nicky,
Had flippers all snotty and sticky,
Her friend Helen-Rose,
Said "Please blow your nose!"
"And then you won't be quite so picky!"...

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Wildlife 44

A slow moving, slimy old snail,
Was stuck upside down in a pail,
When someone kicked the bucket,
He slobbered "Oh 'flip' it!"
And left them a long snotty trail!!...

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As a poet, I'm aware of rhyming words
Like many such as these, birds, herds, and curds
Not being snotty
Not too haughty 
But at times I find witty ones like turds...

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Not a snotty type but love classical music
It's soothing and extremely therapeutic
Though I'm not a snob
Mozart makes me throb
If you could see me now, I'm wearing a tunic...

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I'm a fine host whose good heart is spacious
But some thoughts I let in are pugnacious
They're snotty and rude
Playing golf with my mood
It's a curse being giving and gracious

11/23/22...

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Sure not a snotty type but love classical music
It's so soothing and extremely hypnotic 
Though not a snob
Mozart makes me throb
If you could see me now, I'm wearing a tunic...

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A banjo picker elite I once used to be, 
Now my nose is the favourite choice of me
Don't always enjoy
My pickin' finger gets soiled
Let alone snotty dripping on my manly goatee...

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She is taking all my friends away.
Something I commonly hear.
Daily.

And it is weird but
As soon as it happens
The victim wants no other friend
But that one.

Crazy?
Yes,
But so
Third grade!...

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Going round in the buff is my prerogative
Which in some snotty circles is deemed provocative
So I gives them the finger
And jiggle my jigger
And my jigger says it's really not appreciative...

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Seemed like a fantastic day till I got out of bed
Deteriorated to the point it resembled moldy bread
Not a good analogy
Better than snotty
That reminds me of The Donald quite honestly instead...

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Lumps don't belong anywhere on our body
But don't be alarmed you probably need to go potty
If you have a good one
Smile when you're done
Take a deep breath till the next time, don't get snotty...

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I cross a river of sticks-
frozen, the fallen brothers
of the War of the Seasons.
Snotty dew grasps at siena tips
in a crack between the planks of time
as the Gods cast white petals down
from some isle south of heaven....

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Lumps don't belong anywhere on your body
Don't be alarmed you probably need to go potty
If it turns out a tough one
Just smile when you're done
Take a deep breath till next time, don't get all snotty...

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A “burn your face off” salad by kooky son Scottie
Likes to see tears forming as I grab my face all snotty
Such a funny guy is he
One day revenge he'll see
He's gonna pay for my numerous trips to go potty!!!...

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Allergies
Blisters
Coughing
Dry
Eyes
Fever
Germs
Headaches
Itchy
Joint ache
Kramping
Lifeless
Mucus
Nausea
Outstanding 
Pain
Queezy
Runny
Snotty
Tissues
Uncontrollable
Vomiting
Weak
Exhausted
Yawning
Zanny...

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the persnickety, snooty, snotty cat queen put on airs
as if there were not a ridiculous succulent on her head
I watched her climb those red-carpeted prissy throne stairs
and thought she must be low class, common, and pretty lowbred....

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EVENT PLANNER:
Party
Smarty

AWARDS BANQUET:
Winner
Dinner

STUCK-UP SUPERMODEL:
Snotty
Hotty

CHEERFUL DAD:
Happy
Pappy

TODDLER WITH A SNACK:
Munchin'
Munchkin

HYPERACTIVE CHIMP:
Spunky
Monkey

A SWEET TREAT:
Tummy 
Yummy


1/21/2013...

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Laughter at its fair best
brings reddened eyes, shining tears, and snotty noses
beats the rest

Chuckle or snort
among the riot of roses 
report 

so laugh
none opposes
gaffe!

Laughter at its fair best
among the riot of roses
gaffe!...

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Ahem this phlegm
In snotty body
Needs and pleads
A hotty-toddy.

Think a drink
Or pill will
Fight my plight
Kill this ill?

I might ply
With some rum
Debauch with scotch
Numb the glum.

Until that swill
Outs this bout
My poor sore
Snout will spout....

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Death sniffs around
until it finds the heel
works its way up to the throat.
Leaves a wet spot-on happiness and hope.
Two big black snotty holes, 
(one from which you came}.
The other where everyone eventually goes.
Death, like a bloodhound nose....

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Mrs. Squirrel goes shopping in her red scarf carrying her bag.
Many eye it, for it has a designer label, not worn by a hag.
She is flaunting it actually, for she has that kind of personality.
This snotty upscale fashion-labelled bag suits this squirrel to a tee....

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