Short Playboy Poems

amorous playboy
eighteenth century England
British wry humour...

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Sweet sensual skin
wears scruples thin
until you see your own true sin....

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he is smooth
very cool
always beening choose
will play you like a toy
that
PLAYBOY...

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Embraced by bits and bytes
And yet forever lonely
I showed him Playboy sites
He visits them ’text only'...

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Words are my joy
    For me they are toys
      And boys will be boys ~
  Toying with words, I'm a Playboy...

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Red Ryder had a BB gun
That Playboy bunnies could outrun
Their fluffy tails
Alerted males
A Little Beaver is more fun!...

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A limerick ought to be funny
Like the puff on a Playboy bunny
'tis a bitter pill
But write what you will
Limericks don't earn easy money!...

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Play as you wish
There are no boundaries
Taste me eat me
I am your dish
Do as you wish
There are no boundaries...
Note.Johny Boy use me as a toy......

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Farewell to that playboy named Hugh,
Whose magazine enterprise grew—
He published gloss shots
Of naked sexpots,
Though men read the articles through....

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A playboy and his schnauzer in Ames
think life’s all about fun and games
With his money all spent
he can’t pay the rent
Now it’s his deadbeat dog that he blames...

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There once was a playboy named Ted
 Who'd taken many fine ladies to bed
  But he charmed the wrong girl
  And her boyfriend named Earl
  Started beating him upside the head....

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though croc may look sad
lying alone on river bank
eating life brings joy

Brian Johnston
July 12, 2015

Poet's Notes:
In the Malaysian language and culture, the phrase "land crocodile" is commonly used to describe a "playboy."...

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As if you are Helen of Troy
You are such a nasty playboy!

You wear a beautiful mask
From dusk to dawn dawn to dusk!

You hurt me with Cupid’s arrow
My life is now full of sorrow!

As if you are deaf and blind
You can’t hear and read my mind!...

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~*~
~~**~~
THERE ONCE WAS A LASS FROM MANHATTAN

SHE WORE PETTICOATS MADE OF RED SATIN

FOR PLAYBOY SHE MODELED NUDE

‘TIL HER LIFE WAS VIOLENTLY SUBDUED

AND HER NAME WAS DOROTHY STRATTEN
~~**~~
~*~...

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Santa was secretly reading playboy
on his porcelain throne in childlike joy
Mrs. Santa, frustrated
at the loo door she waited
flustered at her presence tried to destroy

12/15/2022


A Funny Santa Limerick Poetry Contest
Sponsored by: Tania Kitchin...

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My old playboy uncle named Terry

Was bent yet wanted to remarry ;

Until he got a lass

Who smooched without much class,

That his loose joints needed surgery.



LIMERICK CONTEST - BACK BY POPULAR DEMAND
Sponsor: Jan Allison   4/29/2017...

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Delilah's pleasures
Her head lain in Samson's lap
Blind, he grinds around

Concubines' treasures
Solomon's Playboy Mansion
Kingdom of idols

Bathsheba's gestures
Rivers and blood David stole
Hid to no prophet

Stronger have fallen
Your resistance is futile
If you compromise...

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The knives and plate were always between us
With your sister, you were hanging out
With those two handsome knives
At all breakfast, lunch and dinner times
But when you were in the dishwasher
The playboy knife cheated on you
On the dessert plates
Tons of times
Please don’t let him to deceive you
I am the one who will always love you...

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What the fish saw
I cannot still unsee
Naked, stark naked
Sitting there was
Uncle sam and
The statue of liberty
Buck naked at
The playboy mansion
So much for old fashioned
I guess this has been going
On for some time
Our leaders our washingtons
Have hardly shaped a
Mountain side
United Free States of America (North and South)...

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Congrats on your first born, my friend, 
Your playboy days are soon to end, 
Diaper change and sleepless nights 
Come with your new paternal rights. 
I know you meant  a one night stand 
Too bad it’s not the way you planned. 
Turns out your fling was with my wife 
Support them both, they’re yours for life. 

February 29, 2020...

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Let me tell you of something happening years ago:
It was in Atlantic City at the Playboy Hotel and Casino.
A redhead guy was at a craps table inside this joint.
He crowed like a rooster each time he made his point.
I said to him:  "In case you did not know,
the sun came up seven hours ago".

Inspired by a comment I made to one of Caren Krutsinger's poems.
...

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MEN’S WEEKEND FUN
……………………

THE GETAWAY

Vegas
First-Class


FOUR BACHELORS IN  A BAR

Find date
Stalemate


TIME FOR POKER

They bluff
Sell stuff


CRUISING BY MIDNIGHT

Road Trip
Bucks dip


GUY TALK

“Love hurts”
Rhum spurts!



PUNCHLINE  FROM A WOMAN

Playboy?
Girl’s Toy


....................

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An only child, actress, singer, nightclub entertainer
Jayne Mansfield.
Her movie Too Hot to Handle made sense to the people who knew her.
A tomato, lightning, a bonfire, married and divorce numerous times.
She loved her five children and kept her Playboy playmate figure.
Dying in a car crash in New Orleans at the young age of thirty-four.
She lived as if she knew she was running out of time....

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Comics come in many forms 
From Archie and friends 
To Batman and Superman
Beano and the Dandy
Vampire stories
If you have a penchant for blood
Japanese ninja assassin's 
Laura Craft tales for the girl's 
Science Fiction from Galaxy's far away

But if Hustler or Playboy
Are more your thing
A word of advice
Don't bother visiting Comic Con
It may be dark 
But It's most definitely not Blue
Sorry for you...

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Goblins and scarecrows
Hobos and whores
Dress up as a playboy
Become the singer who tours
Make up fun riddles
you can recite at the door
Recieve money and candy
from both the rich and the poor
Carve jack-o-lanterns
Make pumpkin pie
Howl like a werewolf
at the night sky
This holiday comes but, once a year
allowing you some time to just escape
It empowers your imagination
"Halloween" I think it's great!"...

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