Short Pantaloons Poems

Sleepy I am as I contemplate my navel
Dreamed of relaxing in my castle quite palatial
Servants to fan me
And when I pee
They pull up my pantaloons, quite playful...

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Talking about the trends that are new
Inspire my future beyond the new moons
Many long days ahead
Still butter my own bread
And put on my own socks and pantaloons...

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Monkeys, chimpanzees, and hairy baboons
Some good looking dudes, these jungle buffoons
Inside ANIMAL WEEKLY
These jungle sweeties
Are photographed wearing polka dot pantaloons...

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Monkeys, chimpanzees, and hairy baboons
Some good looking dudes, these jungle buffoons
Inside ANIMAL WEEKLY
 These jungle sweeties
Are photographed wearing polka dot pantaloons...

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Delightful hollyhock girls kick up their petticoats
Showing their pantaloons to the rest of the garden
I smile at their old-fashioned innocence
Bumble bees feel their exuberance and stop to chat....

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When I spot a squirrel
It is never common, ordinary or naked
They are usually fully dressed without a smile
The one I spied this morning wore a blue shirtwaist
When she ran up a tree, I saw white eyelet on her pantaloons
I wisely keep some of these observations to myself....

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The horses’ lacy white petticoats and ribboned pantaloons
Were kicked almost as high as a delightful orange harvest moon.
The anger came from the big burly brown baboons
Who were left out by the snotty uppity raccoon.
I felt like an uninformed ridiculous goon,
Because I had assigned the notorious snotty coons
The task of doling out the petticoats and the pantaloons....

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Gussied up Frog Lady is proper but not prim.
Her grotesque legs are thick and spotted, not thin.
She wears pantaloons with lace of cotton white.
Her stretched out undershirt is way too tight.

Frog Lady tries to put her pinkie up to drink.
Her fingers are webbed, and nothing is pink.
We can tell she is trying to be better than us.
She is an arrogant woman, says Mrs. McGus....

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Those madcap Victorian horsewomen were super confident
Silly when you realize they were riding at breakneck speeds, sidesaddle
In those day a woman did not know it was okay to wear pants.
The closest thing she could be caught alive in would be pantaloons.
I am staring at the screen years later, wondering ….
Do they break their tailbones when they fall off?
Or do their bustles serve as a landing pillow?...

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The forest of limitless green,
The spill of red blood,
The rite of sunrise,
White pantaloons to turn away the sun:

An elephant shuffles along
swaying side to side.
He is swathed in red.
The rider sways in his howdah.
His eyes squint at the Asian sun.

Somewhere in the forest 
a sadhu is chanting.
Monkeys are silent.
The prince on his calm beast
follows a path much trodden.
The insects swarm
with indifference....

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Sossled
I wandered as lonely as a dog,
Me pantaloons were full of frogs
Slurping suds while on the grog,
Dog paddling with the ducks,

I thought I knew her lovely face,
Got cuddling with Aunty  Grace
mascara was every place,
me swimming togs got stuck,

a rooster crowed up in the church,
cuckoo clock was in reverse,
I could think of nothing worse,
When incest, comes a riding?

18-sep-11
	Nancy Jones
Contest Name	Make me Laugh...

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Pure cotton ball fluffy
Most popular tissue, end of a q-tip
Fresh clean virginal snow
Bathrooms and bathtubs
Twinkles in the cosmos
White all around me

Lacy white collars
Lacy white anklets
Lacy white petticoats
Lacy white pantaloons
Lacy white old people
White all around me

Light fixture essence
Glow from a distant headlight
Porches and paper
All the same bright
Tails of deer, polka dots on a navy dress
White all around me...

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They drew straws to see who would choose first.
A dainty curly-haired girl with blue eyes drew the long straw.
“I choose the white crocodile please!”
The other children gasped, surprised.

“That would have been my last choice!” many said to each other.
“He matches my go-go boots, lace pantaloons and curtains,” said the girl.
The crocodile was pleased too. He had his eye on this girl for a little while.
Her skin looked so pink and tasty....

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Two friends converse
One idle forenoon,
About ages lost and shared
Sardonic as pantaloons.
How long has each known
The other's happenstance
Through days of sobriety,
And days of romance.
Regaling a mirthful tale
When each was young    
Not keen on life,
But the hymns they have sung.
How can we find worth
In ash and dust?
Not in our tribulations,
But each other's trust.
How long will that association last?
Only as long as regard has passed....

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Sir Reginald Fly-eating Frog is dapper and tall
Women swarm around him when he goes to the mall.
Some scream their appreciation as if Elvis is near.
He is my cousin, and I try to tell them he’s not really that dear.

He is dapper and distinguished though one argues toward me.
I look at him and roll my eyes, I know him better than thee.
I think it’s his jumping legs that puts their pantaloons in a spin.
He is diabolical too, truly not a catch, in no way a win....

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Sweetie pie in your red and white dress and bows on your head,
Your blonde hair makes a pretty ponytail the lady said.
Your chubby pink cheeks indicates your age around two
Those eyelet trimmed stiff legged pantaloons look terrific on you.

Darling girl with a glowing complexion perfect and fine.
I adore seeing you wearing that old red dress of mine.
You make it look fresh, I sing out into the world with glee.
Did not look that great on grandma and that would be me....

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The witch with pizzazz had her chunky legs on display.
Showing off her striped socks and pantaloons to many today.
Why does she sit like that? A younger uninformed lad said.
She is an older witch whose fashion sense curls up in her head.

The witch with pizzazz had a laugh that made us all think.
She was delectable and delightful, like a clean kitchen sink.
She roared to earth pushing her legs against the night air.
We saw that she dressed with absolute infamous care....

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