Short Dumber Poems

Dan is a dumber,
a big nose ugly jumber
So clear in their posts...

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After milk, dumber 
than her called her a dumber
a cold November...

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The More You Know

The Dumber You Know
You Are.

-Gray Squirrel

04-16-2024...

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Trump Is a Fat Cat

Trump is a fat cay;
Wants to be a bureaucrat;
Dumber than door mat.

Jim Horn...

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In Alice, this guy Tweedledum
By anyone’s rule of thumb
His twin, Tweedledee
Just had to be
A little bit dumber than dumb...

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One fine day last summer
came crazy Pete the plumber
he worked a whole week
I still have a leak
they just don't get any dumber...

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He had worked hard all his life, but
he was denied admission
because the other guy was ten points dumber
but a hundred points blacker...

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Words without knowledge 
brings danger to the mind
for it has been emptied
without a sound mind
causing the mouth
to spew empty words...

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Rub-a-dub-dub
Three men in a tub
What were they doing there?
A grout guy, a plumber
Not sure who was dumber
The third guy to open the beer!...

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A Doberman’s known to be picky
With friends so to greet one is tricky
To kiss is a bummer
Undoubtedly dumber
Is to sneak up and give one a hickey...

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T’was her ninth month and early summer,
My wife said she’d heard nothing dumber,
After she had spoken,
Her water had broken...
And me ringing up for a plumber....

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Laugh At Dumb Doormat

Looks like people like to laugh at,
Trump who is plump and also fat;
Often sneered;
Always  weird;
Did become dumber than doormat.

Jim Horn...

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Have you heard of Charlie Kemp?
The man was dumber than a poorhouse pimp
He stuck his foot in a lion's cage
Stupidity had to be the latest rage
Now see him walk with a limp!...

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Ever take an aptitude test and fail
Means you've stumbled off the trail
There's still hope
Join a class of dopes
 Methinks you're dumber than a bag of nails...

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comical movie
had me laughing in stitches 
crazy versus crazier

kookie zany men
driving across the country
short on common sense

a bag of money
returning to the owner
brings total chaos...

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Halloween's here!  It's the end of summer
Costumes, it seems, just keep getting dumber
I'm fixing the kitchen sink
And my wife said, "Let me think,
Pull up your pants or go as a plumber"...

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Sent away at age five for the summer
  No way his parents could have been dumber
     On Johnny's first day at camp
     His pants were completely damp
  Not toilet-trained yet ~ That's a real bummer...

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“Truth
a distraction”
the media pouts
Constricting
those voices
trying to shout
Dumber
than dumb
brain dead by degree
Digging new graves
for the few
— still left free

(Dreamsleep: April, 2024)
...

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Plumber’s Crack

While stuck awaiting the plumber
he thought “How could I be dumber”
‘twixt a text and a tweet 
lost touch with both feet
his now bluish cheeks growing number.


John G. Lawless
5/13/2015...

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Our love was like a lucid dream
I thought I was hallucinating, hooked on LSD
her looks were so intimidating
hearing the word "yes" seemed unlikely
her skin was warm like summer
love blinded me and I became much dumber...

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i woke
up

i tried
to put
pants
on but
it was
uncomfortable

a cummerbund
was even
dumber
and i
kept
thinking of 
a cucumber

i laid back
down
but was
still awake

i'll try to
sleep
but i'm
still
up...

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I’m not too smart
My brother’s dumber
We lie awake
We cannot slumber
Beneath the sheets
We built creatures
With multi-colored
Monster features
They stare at us
We dare not touch’em
We’ll scream and wait
for Mom to crush’em...

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I wonder if I can barter for smart
I would only need a little to start
I’ll trade my dumb
If you need some
Lord knows I have more than plenty to part!



For Dumb and Dumber contest
I'll barter for smart with some of my dumb (my own quote)...

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My sister had a date with a plumber 
He couldn't have been any dumber --
  His lips weren't too wordy
  His hands were quite dirty --
His plunger an absolute bummer


     January 03, 2019
 Entry in "Limericks" contest
   Sponsor: Joseph May...

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there it is
paper always
beats rock but what

shocked me was
aces high and
we tried to

apply but then again
the topic of lets
play life but

number and even left
right there dumber
i thought shoot

i've been
messing up
this game all my

life...

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