Short Blarney Poems

True beauty alarming
No harm being charming
Luck stone kiss Blarney...

Read More

blarney
noun BLAR-nee 
1 : skillful flattery : blandishment
2 : nonsense, humbug...

Read More

How to be a Good Speaker

Speak clearly
Speak gently
Say little and 
Mean much.

Oh, also, if in Ireland don’t kiss the Blarney Stone.
...

Read More

Come all ye, kiss that blarney stone
Join in the legend and be known
For the gift of gab
Ye come kiss the slab
Eloquence and luck shall be shown...

Read More

A beautiful girl from Killarney
Drove all her suitors barmy
She was having such fun
Didn't want to marry anyone
She just gave them all heaps of blarney...

Read More

Mark Carney:
A smart, gifted man and that's no blarney!
Politically speaking, he was on the perimeter,
but now he's Canada's twenty-fourth Prime Minister....

Read More

once was an tricky old leprechaun
colored blarney stone with neon crayons
so much for gift of gab
I just hailed down a cab
and ran over that fairytail icon...

Read More

Beauteous words
Bandbox words
Bristly words
Brazen words
Buffoon-like words
Busy words
Brainy words
Blarney words
Blimey words
Bewildered words
Be aware....

Read More

Assign region flattery gauges?
Silly but let’s try anyway.
The Scottish slather it on.
The Germans withhold it.
It’s Irish blarney.
Overindulge
Compliment
Praise...

Read More

Sheriff Andy’s had his share of strife
with his deputy dope, Barney Fife.
That first time that Barney
showed up full of blarney,
Andy ought to have run for his life!


Feb. 7, 2019...

Read More

There was a young jockey from Ireland 
Booked to ride the race horse, grey diamond
he wanted to be seen
painted grey diamond green
and kissed the Blarney Stone for Ireland.

15/03/2017....

Read More

There was a lad known for his shenanigans,
Who completed each act with such naughty grins.
He leaned backward all alone,
To kiss the old Blarney Stone!
That limestone-lipped lad known for shenanigans....

Read More

tis what happens when ya’ be kissin’ the Blarney Stone
although I never did~ they don’t wipe between kissers
and my wonderful wife said I didn’t need to~ my gift of gab comes naturally	


...

Read More

On Saint Pat’s Day, with the Guinness flowin’
All night long the blarney was blown’
I’ll trap a Leprechaun—I’d shout 
With chicken soup, not stout!
Then caught the rarely seen Lepre-Cohen!

Written 3/27/22...

Read More

On St. Patrick's Day, old boozehound Barney
Howls grand Gaelic airs at a pub in Killarney
Place a strong stout at his paw
And he'll howl Erin go braugh!
Yes, County Kerry folk are given to blarney!

3/17/23...

Read More

In a horrible dull monotone

Bobby spoke, and his girlfriend would moan,

“No kisses from me,

dear Bobby McGee

till you first kiss the old Blarney Stone.”


Written March 15, 2017 for
Kim Merryman's Luck of the Irish Limerick Contest...

Read More

There is no pain!just numb remains.
living inside and seeing clearly out!
Fear of the one who thinks you dumb!
blame?insane?have no doubts!
I never kissed the blarney stone.
I swallowed it in one sook!
never missed a beat!or owed a loan!
the dancing champion had this sudden stroke of luck!?...

Read More

enchanting ravishing seductress
keeps men guessing her constant needs
her latest conquest is my cousin Gus
victim of her spells, no one can supersede

full of blarney and oodles of bull
twisting him about with great success
she has mesmerized poor Gus’s soul
a black widow who does not confess...

Read More

There once was a leprechaun named Arnie,

   Who hailed from the village of Killarney.

      When his belly was sated,

         Said the lass that he dated:

            "You are chock-full of Guinness and blarney!"

Entry for Kim Merryman's "Luck of the Irish Limerick Contest"

(14 March 2017)...

Read More

There was an old sauce chef from Killarney, 
    Whose Irish stew, was flavoured with blarney.
    While he quaffed bottles of hock,
    That was infused with shamrock.
    Which spiced up his special bouquet garni.

    3 / 1 / 2021.

    For the St. Patrick's day contest.
    Sponsor. L Milton Hankins....

Read More

If you are going to frequent a pub today
Make it in Cork, though it be far away
Make it Murphy’s, for it is St. Paddy’s day
And while you are there, you had better pray.

The Irish are wild, never dull or gray.
They always talk blarney, want to have the last say.
If you want me to come, I will be there said Jay
I love Irish pubs, there is plenty of play!...

Read More

Mr. Jeremy Brown
His students he had to calm down
He tried to teach them English
But ended up in confused anguish

Miss Courtney
The principal who hated men's blarney
Paid Mr. Brown's class a surprise visit
Not one correct answer could she elicit



10.22.2021



"Mind Your Language" comedy series

For Joseph May's "Clerihew 2" contest...

Read More

Parade in the streets, eat corned beef,
And let the darkness flow.
St. James’s Gate is the birthplace.
Let the darkness flow.
Grand day for grazing, life’s amazing.
So let the darkness flow.
Jump in a reel or fiddle a jig.
Then let the darkness flow.
Drive out the snakes, embrace the blarney.
Letting the darkness flow.
It may be the day for wearing the green,
But let the darkness flow!
...

Read More

Shawn was full of blarney most of his youthful days
with his full face, his emerald eyes and his ginger hair
He sang Irish ditties in knee slapping ways
When he had too much beer at the Dublin fair

He is so rotund, so Rubenesque, so big, some said.
Santa Claus is too, said his wife, her head totally red.
She liked everything about her chubby happy man.
Loved him completely, as only a second wife can....

Read More

The Blarney Stone
It was a bucket list I had to fill
I puckered up and felt the chill
The stone was cold upon my lips
The ledge was hard beneath my hips
Within my head a bell had rung
And words were forming on my tongue
Stories for the young and old
Simply waiting to be told
A scrap of paper and a pen
I jot a line down now and then
In hopes someday someone will read
The gift of gab?  A gift indeed...

Read More