Curses! You woke my Simon Bar Sinister!
Cuz, you fondled Miss Sweet Polly's Purebred!
I'm not gonna tolerate this Riff Raff no more!
Now, you'll deal with the Mighty Underdog's lead!
So, no Shoeshine Boy today little boy!
Go on and call your Cad Lackey, he's cranky!
You're just one more of those Little Rascals!
You're all gonna get a spanking from Spanky!
spry purebred feline
hailing from siberia
snowsquall royalty
AP: Honorable Mention 2025
ghoulish gray ghosts gather in Galloway Gallows
girls scouts come by with Hersheys and marshmallows
goblins and ghouls stand around in the moors
hoping one of them will drop their tasty Smores
wily wild Wisconsin witches whisk by on Brookside brooms
tormenting the others, flying in and out of the rooms
we normals are quick to make excuses and leave
purple purebred puritans provide plenty of peeve
I saw Tarzan,
with no clothes on.
Who knew there
was a Black Swan?
Cinderella.
got home
after midnight.
Muhammad Ali,
is looking for a fight.
Pinocchio.
tells a bunch of lies.
A new movie,
Lord of the Flies.
Aladdin turned
out to be a thief.
Don't squeeze the
Charmin,
Where's the beef?
Batman drove
200 miles per hour.
Dr. Frankenstein
screaming for
more power.
Snow White lived
with seven men.
I thought that
was a sin.
Popeye had tattoos
And smoked a pipe.
Adolf Hitler on the loose
With the Reich.
Pac-man ate pills to
Improve performance.
The Hulk got mad,
And turned enormous.
Shaggy and Scooby are hippies
With the munchies.
Brenda Spencer didn't
Like Monday's.
Underdog was dating
Molly Purebred.
Kids in Africa,
Go unfed.
Felix the cat
had a bag of tricks.
Achilles dipped in the
River Styx.
The black widow
poisons her man.
The Police singing
about Roxanne.
Turbo1904 ?
Too stoned to care
wild eyes and hair
My friend and I dare
to order four pizzas
Where are your friends
the manager inquired
Oh, they’ll be here in a bit
our tongues purebred liars
Well, we snarfed down the pizzas
though ‘our friends’ never showed
So, when we asked the proprietor
how much we owed…
He told us $200 bucks
‘coz it’s just your good luck
to meet up with a fellow sleaze
who understands your ‘munchies’
~ and has already contacted the fuzz
Polly Purebred was a bit too stuck up for my taste.
But Underdog was always there, with a heave and a haste.
I remember being shocked when I saw him in color in 1964.
Picturing him in blues, not reds, now seeing him down to his core.
He flew across the screen at Polly’s first whistle.
His cape was smooth and clean, without thorns or a thistle.
Polly Purebred never stop yelping, not a favorite with me.
But Underdog always saved her, with a bit of cartoonish glee.
You villain, you fiend
We booed you each Saturday
When you came on the screen.
We shrieked, and we hollered
For Dudley Do-Right to make short work of you
We loved it when justice prevailed
And your just desserts were due.
Snidely Whiplash
You villain, you fiend.
Capturing Polly Purebred.
You were utterly mean!
A purebred Arabian horse
is strikingly beautiful,
Finely chiseled bone structure
Concave profile, a distinctive head shape
and high tail carriage
prized by the Bedouin people,
the desert dwellers.
But Duldul was a mule—
Historical accounts concur,
However, folklore refers to it as horse—
Even a winged horse
with the power of speech;
And according to the Quran, Prophet Muhammad
flew to heaven on a winged horse.
A mule is the offspring of donkey and mare.
A union between the donkey, Ya’fur,
and Kyrat, the Arabian Stallion,
She was favored by the Prophet Muhammad
and he rode her into many battles.
Duldul had been a gift to the Prophet from
Al-Muqawqis the ruler of Alexandria,
accompanied by a donkey called Ya’fur,
said to be the descendant of the donkey
ridden into Jerusalem by Jesus.
~Contest: A Notable Horse
~Sponsor: Robert James Liguori.
Paws on the Avenue
Every afternoon ‘bout half past four
Paddy and I go out the door
No straying from our daily ritual.
Paws on Fido Avenue
Happy tails of sloppy kisses unmuzzled
Parade of canines – every kind “bone-i-fied.”
A purebred mutt strut cavalcade
Fashion parade of single coats
Long hairs march in pants
Yaps and barks and woofs
Howling hounds the moon
Canine panoply unleashed
Treats at every yard
Toys at every door
Red hydrants for pee-mail.
Delight rolls over
For belly rubs and tummy scratches
A loving pat upon the head.
No stray warm beds on winter nights
No puppies sleeping in the rain
No litter left abandoned scattered by the winds!
This march of conformation
Moves by happy gaits
Where even cats are welcomed in humane harmony.
Every afternoon ‘bout half past four
Paddy and I go out the door
For this our fantasy walk on Fido Avenue.
9-18-21
Contest: Avenue
Sponsor: Julia Ward
Dudley Do Right.
And he did right, but he was banal and dull.
Polly Purebred went for Under Dog
The king of Pow! Bam! Zam! Whap! Whack! Wham!
Smash! Smack! Slap! Hit!
We are told to go for the easy-going sweet ones,
But maybe some of us learned to love the bad boys
when we watched the cartoons of the sixties.
Our children bought us DNA tests for Christmas.
Um, why would we want to do this?
What if we wanted to rob a bank or burglarize a home?
Aren’t these results going into an FBI data base?
We did it because they kept asking us about it.
Every nationality I wanted to be, did not show up for me.
My husband who has a German surname has always bragged.
We Germans are smart, we Germans are brilliant, we Germans.
His came back with this result. He is more English than the English.
He is ninety-seven percent English. I laughed my petootie off.
I would have at least half Native American blood, I was sure.
But alas, I did not.
I came out with Swedish, which is oddly odd.
A bit of German which was more than my husband
And mostly Pennsylvania Dutch and English.
I am a mutt, whereas he is a purebred – but not German.
Saturday Morning November 1964
My twin and I have a TV Guide in front of us
We are thrilled because we got a colored TV set yesterday.
In the TV Guide there is a peacock by the shows that are in color.
This will be the first time we have ever seen Under Dog in color!
We watch the clock.
10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1.
Under Dog music starts.
A flying underdog flashes across the sky.
He is wearing mostly red; his cape is blue.
My twin and I stare at each other.
“I thought his outfit was blue!” we both say.
We have only seen him in grayscale up until now.
Polly Purebred was a complete surprise too.
I had pictured her in green, and my sister thought she would be in pink.
She was dressed in blue.
We ate our soggy cornflakes in silence.
I felt betrayed. I am not sure how my sister felt.
It is like seeing a movie after you have read the book
and have pictured the characters completely different.
body builders have an ab-sense
girdles are just an abs-tractions
to communicate is to accomplish-'meant'
to know your limits means know-'ledge'
too much wine means too absorb-'bent'
a purebred can be a cat-as-'trophey'
being elected does not come with a flag'grant'
women's gossip is gal-'lore'
a thinker is as an idea-'list'
a divorcee can be over-'wed'
old age homes mean pack-'aging'
dinner out means a pal-at-'table'
a good marriage seems as a pair-'able'
conflicting medical opinions means a pair-a-'docs'
a couple can pair-'rent'
dying for some means to pass-'time'
to enjoy means to be pleasure-'able'
those pictures of your whole life are just a photo-'graph'
pharmaceutical companies do create pill-'grims'
insults can be two per-'verse'
be positive and plea-'sure'
the outhouse sign says po-'tent'
not expensive means price-'less'
an ocean cruise is a relation-'ship'
where does a frustrated writer ram-'page'
drinking properly means ration-'ale'
to be awake means two real-'eyes'
the preacher was right-'full'
poetry soup is made from different poet-'trees'
best university education is on a scholar-'ship'
stan sand
You love your purebred. I'll love my
Whatachamacallit.
I wonder how he came to be at our back door?
I must admit
He is exquisite
For something I've never seen before.
You love your purebred. I'll love my
Whatachamacallit.
Darling he's a misfit that will fit
Right in with our children playing under
The sycamore.
I must admit
He's becoming my favorite.
God sent me something I can't ignore.
You love your purebred. I'll love my
Whatachamacallit.
Look love he has personality and wit
He brought my sleepers to me that were
Over there on the floor.
I must admit
Honey, this is going to be definite
He will live here forevermore.
You love your purebred. I'll love my
Whatchamacallit.
Now our family's complete I must admit.
GRANDMA AT THE TRACK
foolishly
i threw the rock
and appeared
to hopscotch
until the ill of my ankle
violently mocked
i chalk it all up
to forget me nots
my mind over knees
ignores
the rusty gears
as my wrinkled hand
avoids resistance
hovering a half inch
above the bannister -
safe.
now i watch youngsters skate.
those whipper snappers
with the gait of a purebred horse.
i huddle with my overloaded purse
carrying 3 cell phones and mine,
a roll of ticket winnings,
leftover candy,
then i
chase my four-year old grandson
‘round the outskirts
as he weaves between strangers
taking my heart with him.
mind you,
the thoroughbreds
are resting soundly
on the bench.
4/25/2019
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