Long Tragicomic Poems

I (a youthsome, wholesome, jokesome, handsome,...
gamesome, chucklesome, bothersome,
and awesome modest fellow)...
does not deliberately court immortalization,
and wonders what criteria confer elevation,
exaltation, glorification, hero worship,
idolization, veneration, or worship.

I go about a daily humdrum routine
me, a twenty first...

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Defecation accidentally clogged...

for the umpteenth time 
during spate to sit scrawny buttucks 
on porcelain throne id est 
videre licet toilet bowl...
with toxic water brew threatening
to overflow onto the floor,
and hence found yours truly (me)
immersing himself...

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Spouse cannot forget mine suppressed flatulence upon our first date

While yours truly sat here 
at the desk housing MacBook Pro,
pondering his next idée fixe apropos
for gamut of anonymous readers,
he unexpectedly, noisily and effectually
exploded out rear...

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The very abridged version recounting untold tragicomic storied life of Matthew Scott Harris

I led a boring life.
The end.

All joking aside, now the epilogue.

As a bookish fellow born January 13th,1959
he attended school and got promoted
as a...

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Courtesy severely receding hair line..., 
yours truly enveloped within morose mood

I (Samson incarnate) 
frankly experience zapped strength,
hence sulk and pine for salad days of youth
when abundant golden locks adorned me noggin.

Now in doddering dotage scant wisps...

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Shattered dreams of New Canaan

no longer land of the free home of the brave,
original rightful occupants hoodwinked, petrified,
where diseases xeroxed
ambushed, crushed, extinguished,
squashed, trashed, wampashed,
the entire kit and kaboodle zapped
violent unwelcome intruders
celebrated acquisition or outright
annexation of...

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Almost three years ago from today December 20th, 2022

self quarantined misanthrope...
pitched into purgatory wham!

Ably cane resign eternal damnation (mine)
courtesy devil specially engraved telegram
prestidigitation found me vanishing shazam,
without a trace I 
disappeared in thin air voila
Earthly...

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Defecation clogged toilet bowl...
courtesy prescription laxative AMITIZA

and found (me) zee papa pooped out,
thus embarrassing communiqué I post,
a reasonably rhyming poetic shout
to air grievances
concerning outsize bowel movement
hoping (fat/slim chance)
Mike Rowe happens tubby about,
though shadow of doubt
he...

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I cherish every precious lock of my hair as a keepsake

Twas partly on account
of yours truly being incarnation of Samson;
spouse and I wed
please fate, don't say alopecia didst tread;
though atheist to higher power
yours truly pled
heart...

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Self quarantined misanthrope pitched into purgatory wham!

Ably cane resign eternal damnation (mine)
courtesy devil specially engraved telegram
prestidigitation found me vanishing shazam,
without a trace I disappeared in thin air voila
Earthly travails atop horns of dilemma ram
into me...

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Defecation clogged toilet bowl courtesy metamucil..
and found (me) zee papa pooped out

Anal eyes zing thee
nightly dump for yesterday
July 8th, 2020 - whereby
plunger helped obstruction give way
I nearly lost me life and limb oy vey

oh my...

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I, (though ye feel averse associating
with birth father) attest,
perhaps undeserving your vicariously quest
regaling, surmounting, and triumphing
storied Penn ultimate academic conquest

affirms his pride and joy at
stellar success no credit to this beastliest
inept papa, who winces with...

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I
of
warped words
& soundless mind
out of mindless sight
no(some)where
blurring into
the No-Go Realm
(chasing cunning
cryptic clouds
of thoughtcrimes)

I touch
no man's land
out never
where I'm supposed
to be or
not begin

I am there
not here
catastrophically
contemplating
caricatures
of contorted
mindscapes

I am here or there
out of control
cleverly out of sorts
sorting...

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early this year
gentle as calm ocean waters
lapping along a weir
thumb and fore finger
of right hand would peal back,

(via diagonally flippant motion
asper calendar
representing progression of time)
gets flipped over to veer
in one direction (linear)

revealing the next month...

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equating dreams
as thought forms
by heart conjured
we pause the cause
of such movement 
getting to the roots
body identification 
also termed as ego

negating nothing
we examine desire
that so manifests
deluded cravings
again and again
needing fulfilment 
in this life or the next
until...

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The searcher searching, moves away from love
The all that is, is within, not above
Employing mind, to go beyond the mind
A tragicomic tale, how desires bind

All moments of joy are devoid of thought
Free from identity, that...

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