Long Texas Poems

Limericks I - Relatives and Relativity

The Cosmological Constant
by Michael R. Burch

Einstein, the frizzy-haired,
said E equals MC squared.
Thus all mass decreases
as activity ceases?
Not my mass, my a$$ declared!


A$$-tronomical
by Michael R. Burch

Relativity, the theorists’ creed,
says mass increases...

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Twenty two years had passed  by

She blinked, and a lifetime had passed

She started this job as a lark

She never thought it would last

Two husbands and rehab were part of this bar

The husbands...her clients all...

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Alone I arrive, walking from Frederick
over the gaps, across gentle hills
out onto a knoll
overlooking this burnished landscape.
Before me I see countless writhing rows
of indiscernible shapes gathered
in terrible rituals mid fire and smoke
darkening the sun.
From distant...

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Limericks VI - Religion

Pell-Mell for Hell Mel
by Michael R. Burch

There once was a Baptist named Mel
who condemned all non-Christians to hell.
When he stood before God
he felt like a clod
to discover His Love couldn’t fail!



Why I...

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Yet at this very moment the cathedral was crumbling
down upon the cries of foresaken refugees, 
the monastery's walls wobbling from war's wreckage, 
and as the black bursts billowed into sun drenched brutality
with the bodies of...

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The Alaskan Oil Pipeline

Nineteen sixty-eight confirmed the year
Of discovery by ‘Humble Oil’
To North America’s largest oil field,
On the North Slope of the Brooks Range;
A west to east Northern Alaskan mountain chain.
An area forty miles wide...

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Dear Siblings Three,

I was reading a story
in which some siblings became estranged
after their parents died,
while others moved toward greater solidarity.

This is a variation on a diaspora story.
But, here growing physical distance
is seen more as a...

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Hello CRYSTALSKY*.                                 ...

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Dear Toni,

I saw you on The Daily Show
the other day
having your way
with Trevor,
or was it the other way around?
Not sure.

I'm also not sure where we first went wrong,
but I'm sorry for once having thought you...

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A Most Courageous American President for the Ages

I thought it would be most appropriate for me to take a moment to
share some of my reflections on the life and distinguished public
service of the late 41st...

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if you have taken the time to browse through this eclectic collection of self-indulgent foolishness, I hope you’ve been entertained by the quirkiness of its content, or at the very least, annoyed by the pervasiveness...

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They came from as far a way as New York and Dallas Texas. The class of 1981 wasn't a large class, it was the very first class of a very very private school. Their school,...

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Dedicated to the 2000 National College Football Champions, the Oklahoma Sooners 

--------------------------------------------------------------

Over fifty years, boy and man, I’ve been a Sooners fan
Watched and reveled in their glories, every one;
But there’s no more glorious “Sooner Magic”...

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Paper preparer please find cherry terror jackfrreeze frost frozen ice cycle are called and not chosen God fearing beware betrayal falls to all chosen green guys small my Homeys disaster only falls once in a...

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Hold the phone, hold the freakin’ phone. Lisa’s got a boyfriend!
I’ve never seen Lisa with a boyfriend. Lisa draws men like fireworks on a dark night, but I’ve never seen her keep one. I mean,...

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This is, as indicated, the 1st THIRD of this lengthy poem. The 2nd and final thirds had to be posted separately due to Poetry Soup's file-size limitations. No other way I could manage to make...

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Galloping hooves broke morn's peace in Soup Creek's Main Street
When Jimmy Smith rode in from Bar 20 his face white as a sheet
He stopped at Sheriff Koplins office and banged heavily on the door 
"What's...

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A couple of months ago, my wife received news that there was an                      ...

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Limericks IV - Donald Trump

The Hair Flap
by Michael R. Burch aka "The Loyal Opposition"

The hair flap was truly a scare:
Trump’s bald as a billiard back there!
The whole nation laughed
At the state of his graft;
Now the...

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Gaylord Laryngitis was a monstrous human being.    
They say he weighed…at ten years old…at least 400 pounds,
But standin’ 6 foot 7…and because he exercised…
he actually didn’t look real “fat”…despite the way it...

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It gradually turned chilly between Thanksgiving and Christmas. Although Frosty the Snowman rarely visited our part of Texas, his pal, Jack Frost, surely did.  He wafted his way through the drafty house, chased by...

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I

These days I forgive myself everything. After all
I'm alone and unhappy so I give myself a little treat
whenever possible. On summer nights I remember
the good women who loved me but live with their husbands now.

This...

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Sipping cherry limeade, driving in the car parade, 
we're cruising in the Lone Star state.
Didn't want a bucket seat; the thing it couldn't beat, 
was sitting up close to your date.
One hand on the wheel...

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What are some differences
between post-millennial Trumpism
and pre-millennial Republicanism?

I know...I know!
Republicans used to be fiscal conservatives
but now support a one trillion dollar deficit
per unaffordable health and safety care year,

Expanded deficit spending 
despite taking more from not...

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I hope it would not be a parody of Michael Morrell’s political scientific position
to suggest all relationships are political
and all political relationships fall somewhere on a spectrum
between perfect co-empathic trust,
nutritionally and regeneratively favored by creolizing...

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